


An (Im)Perfect Angel

by Streamyyy



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Angel Brian, Angel Dan, Demon Ross, Divorced Arin, Eventual Romance, Game Grumps - Freeform, Human Arin, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, My First AO3 Post, Slightly OOC (for a bit), Slow Burn, Tabacco Use, cigarette use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2021-03-03
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:15:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 51,965
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25078978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Streamyyy/pseuds/Streamyyy
Summary: Dan's a not-so-good angel. Working in HALOS Inc's "Department of Human Wishes" in Heaven. He works among other angels to grant human wishes... if he finds them so deserving. However, with Dan's wholly consuming dislike of humankind, he's begun granting wishes solely based only on the beauty of the human wishing it. Upon being caught out for breaking the "Golden Rule" he's banished down to earth, now a mortal, only able to earn back his wings by completing a very Hanson sized task.
Relationships: Dan Avidan/ Unnamed Character (Mentioned), Dan Avidan/Arin Hanson
Comments: 75
Kudos: 95





	1. Light as a Feather

**Author's Note:**

> So...as a long time lurker this is pretty scary for me. It's been a while since I stretched these fan fiction writing fingers but hey, worth it. I'm a little outta practice so cut me a little slack if I get some things wrong. Dan may seem very out of character at the start, he's a super dick fr fr...more Sexbang than Avidan, but he'll grow into the Dan we all know and love as we move forward. Stick with me, and feel free to leave a comment if you so choose. Many Thanks, and enjoy.

"Fuckin' humans, man."  
  
These chips are stale. Dan's sure of it. You'd think Heaven would have it in its good graces to stock the lobby vending machine with non-stale chips, but it seems not. 

It's times like this Dan's one-hundred per cent certain HALOS Inc. doesn't want their employee's working at their best. That's how he justifies cheating the system as he does. Here on HALOS Inc's 76th floor, the Department of Human Wishes deals with the wishes humans make, if that wasn't clear by the name, however shallow and superficial. Whenever a human looks to the sky, hoping someone might hear their prayer, they can bet it does reach someone's ears...that's not always a good thing though. Sometimes it lands on deaf ears, someone who's more concerned with the size of your tits than the size of your heart.

Leigh Daniel Avidan, or as he's better known to his peers: Danny Sexbang, was and is an angel with a very skewed sense of superiority. Humans, to him, are scum. The lowest of the low. Sick, gross sacks of skin with the complexity of a glass of water. Why work in an industry geared towards human betterment? Well, that wasn't entirely his choice. His father Avi worked here before him, working his way up to the top, rung by rung until he had the ears of some big wigs up at the top, managing to get his wayward son an interview. Dan was only convinced to take the opportunity to make some money. As an angel grows older the birds up here become more interested in what you're willing to spend on them rather than what you're willing to commit. He decided this job, however against his views he perceived it, would get him somewhat of a steady income. So, if charming the pants off the interviewer was what he had to do, then that's what he would do...and charm he did.

Dan was as attractive as they come. Lean and tall. Hair so wild, that when it caught the wind it would remind anyone of a shampoo commercial. Careless scruff on an angular, chiselled face surrounding a million-dollar smile. Deep-set, dark eyes that held a spark of mischief and life. Lastly, blindingly white wings anchored to his back, brushing the floor ever so slightly as he walked with an immense wingspan some would only dream of. Landing ladies and keeping them coming was no problem for Mr Sexbang, and he knew it too. He was certain whatever trouble made its way to him, he could sweet-talk his way out of it no problem. Just another fuckin' waste of time.

He stares at his computer screen with absolute apathy. Today it displays a man running for a bus stop, lugging a briefcase behind him. Rain is hammering down around him and he's looking up at the sky, silently begging whatever deity there is to at least let him catch the bus. Unfortunately for this nameless man, that deity today was Dan. Not-at-your-service Dan Avidan.

The Department of Wishes work was very simple.

1\. Receive a short video clip of the wish being made via your computer screen.

2\. Read the file on the human that accompanies the video clip. Simple enough.

3\. Then finally decide, based _exclusively_ on the information in the file, whether or not that human deserves that wish granted. 

Dan had started ignoring these instructions since he decided it would be more fun to check out the sacks of skin of the female variety based on looks than it would be reading their file. Hell, they could've killed a whole family. Damn, they could've murdered 10 whole families in cold blood for all Dan cared. If they were hot, and they could get it, they could have their wish, whatever it was. To this tune, Dan had granted many a senseless wish. A modelling job. Curing a craving for a McFlurry. Inspiring a long-inactive band into creating new music. These were all unoriginal, uninspiring, dull wishes to him. However, it really didn't matter. These girls were smoking hot. Men who happened to end up on his screen, well, they might as well not have made a wish at all. Dan was _not_ gay, and he struggled with anything that may imply otherwise.   
  
There was only one problem. HALOS Inc worked on a 'Golden Rule' that would implicate any angel caught breaking it in an immediate shit storm. No one really knew what the punishment for breaking it was. You hardly ever see an angel who had done so again, but Dan still didn't care. In fact, his memory of such a rule existing at all was blurry. He knew there was something of the like, but he doesn't remember what it was. If only he did. If only he knew what kind of shit he was getting himself into.   
  
The 'Golden Rule' is as follows:   
"We shall not hold any personal human bias."  
  
Quite simply, that means if you grant a humans wish, want or desire based on anything outside of the information provided to you; you were absolutely, unequivocally, unreservedly fucked. 

Dan eyes the man on his screen exhausted. Maybe he had too much golden elixir with the no-name date at the bar last night but something about this meaningless wish annoyed him even more than it usually would. He slams the button above the video labelled 'DENY WISH'.   
  
"Bri..." Dan turns to his salt-and-pepper haired friend at the desk next to him, whining, "I need a smoke. Come with me?"   
  
Brain arches a silver brow at him, "That's the fifth one this morning."  
  
Dan ignores that, "It's so hot in here..." His eyes catch a lady checking him out, passing behind Brian, "But maybe that's just me?"  
  
Brian huffs, grabbing the cigarette packet thrown haphazardly on the desk, "Alright, hot stuff. Let's go before your ego gets as big as you try to convince me your dick is."

\---  
  
Outside the air was dry, and the sun was shining as always. Angel's controlled the weather and usually, it only rained over plots of crops and agricultural lands. Elsewhere it was always the perfect temperature, with a cloudless blue sky. The only reasons angels knew what clouds looked like was the ground. Fluffy, white, misty clouds made up the floor of Heaven. There was something about all this perfection that Dan hated. It just seemed so...alien to him. Like it didn't match, or something was missing. Yeah, he enjoyed the cushy lifestyle. It was nice to always be able to find something to do. It was nice that people were always willing to help. It was nice people often made you shit out of the goodness of their own hearts. Recently a bakery nearby to Dan's place had started making a very specific type of bread just for Dan had he happened to stop by that day. At the same time...it really irked him. He never fully felt like he belonged. He liked the colour black, he liked a little bit of dirt, and a little bit of nasty. He liked wasting his time, not always in the pursuit of betterment. He liked sleeping in. He liked a little...dark. 

"So." Brian began, "Saw you deny that wish earlier. Does it ever worry you that maybe that might affect your work ethic?"  
  
"Dude...When have I ever really given a shit about work ethic?" 

"Then why work here? What's the point?"  
  
"The cash," Dan explains matter-of-factly, but then again, he wasn't entirely sure of that either. Originally that was the reason, but now he had some doubt. "or somethin'. I dunno man. The ass. There are some hot ass ladies here."

"It's always the damn ladies with you, Dan. What happens when you run out of ladies? What happens then? You know I adore you, man. I've stuck with you and your bullshit from day one, but you and I both know that you've only started doing this since--"  
  
"Since? Bri. I told you to cut it out with talking about that. Yes, I was broken up with. Yes, maybe he was my first love, but you know since then I've decided I don't like dating guys anyway. There's really no loss here. I'm good. I've moved on."   
  
Brian shifts on his feet, leaning against the glass floor-to-ceiling windows of HALOS Inc's lobby, blowing out cigarette smoke in front of him. He watches the tendrils intertwine with one another and tilts his head unsurely. "Right. Well...All I'm saying is you got a reputation, y'know. I can only take solace in the fact that since you haven't been fired yet, you must be granting some wishes."  
  
"Tch. Yeah." Dan kisses his teeth, "Hardly, only of hot chicks...Human wishes are so pointless, Bri. They're so unoriginal. All they can think about is their white Pickett fences and house on the hill. A golden retriever called Fetch and a white Persian called Fluffy. Two kids, twins, a boy and a girl. I can't stand it sometimes."   
  
"What do you mean 'only of hot chicks'?" Brian's interest seems piqued, leaning in, "More specifically, what do you mean 'only'?"  
  
"Well...I can't remember the last time I granted a wish for someone ugly--"  
  
"Dan!"  
  
"What?" Dan whines again, loudly, "Don't get your panties in a twist." He takes a drag of his cigarette, "If that creates an issue then I'll just talk my way out of it."   
  
Brian roughly takes Dan's wrist and pulls him inside the building, pointing to a large, unmissable, gold plaque plastered behind the secretary's desk space. The Golden Rule sits inscribed into its surface.   
  
"You're telling me you missed this every day on the way in?" He pauses, "You're telling me you don't remember taking he fucking oath on the first day of the job?" Brian looks annoyed, pressing two fingers to his temple.  
  
Dan reads over the plaque a couple of times, "Well, sure, I remember this..." He mutters sheepishly, "I just thought it was there to liven the place up a bit. It's mighty dreary in here anyway so--"  
  
"Dan!" Brian exclaims a second time.  
  
"That's the name."  
  
"That's the Golden Rule that you just fucking broke! The big-G probably only knows how many times...you're fucked. You're totally fucked."  
  
"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Bri." Dan huffs, more interested in checking out the new secretary, "Listen. Whatever the Golden Rule is, it's no biggie, I haven't been caught or--"  
  
Dan is quickly cut off by an announcement over the loudspeaker, "Leigh Daniel Avidan to the CEO's office please."   
  
Dan locks eyes with Brian, "Soooo...that's me, right? There isn't like...another me?"  
  
Brian shakes his head, pulling him into a quick hug, "It's been really nice knowing you, dude."  
  
"My dick is hard for you too, Bri." Dan quips sarcastically, rolling his eyes, turning on his heels and heading to the elevator, taking the trip up to the CEO's office.   
  
\---  
  
As Dan waits in the waiting room outside the frosted glass windows of the CEO's office, he feels the first bead of sweat run down his temple. It was unusual for Dan to sweat, much less get flustered over being called into the office. This had happened many times before. He'd been called in for stealing from the vending machine, hitting on too many members of staff, just all-around bad behaviour, but somehow this time...it felt different. It felt heavier. The wind picked up and he was heading into the eye of the storm. 

The secretary's phone rings and she nods, looking to Dan, "You can go in now, Mr Avidan."  
  
"Thanks, Stacy." He felt familiar enough with the secretary now that he felt comfortable on a first-name basis.   
  
She leans forward, "You didn't call me after that night."  
  
He shrugs, "Sorry...got busy. Next time?"  
  
Stacy slumps back into her seat, rolling her eyes, "You're some piece of shit, Avidan. You're lucky you're so good in bed."   
  
He almost coaxes a grin onto his face but then he remembers who he's here to see and steels himself before pushing open the doors to the office.   
  
The CEO sits there, staring out the windows onto his view of Heaven's perfectly perfect skyline. His office has all the must-haves of a luxury study. An ice bucket and a table brandishing hard scotch. Polished leather seats and a desk filled with numerous ambiguous awards. Random photos scattered about and plaques detailing some bullshit degree he has. 

The CEO himself wears a white suit with a sky blue tie and pocket square. Cufflinks in sterling silver made into the shape of HALOS Inc's logo. His white hair still holds some of the blonde of his youth despite looking remarkably young for his real age. Angel's were always blessed with that though. Seeming to stop ageing once their body clock reached a comfortable plateau. His face is hard and cold, not looking pleased, "Avidan. Good to see you again."  
  
"That seems sarcastic, sir." Dan heads over, taking a tentative seat on the chair opposite his boss, "Though...you always did have a remarkable sense of humour!"   
  
The CEO's face doesn't move, nor does his body, his eyes just eerily slide over and lock onto Dan like a target. Eyes so clear blue they're almost see-through.   
  
Dan smiles softly, "Hopefully we can sort this out pretty easily though, yeah? We've got...uhm...such a rapport built-up here."   
  
"It's not quite so simple this time though, Mr Avidan." He moves so quickly it almost gives Dan a shock, turning the monitor of his computer to face him. 

What meets Dan is a spreadsheet with too many red marked boxes to count, all marked 'Denied' with a maximum of two green boxes marked 'Accepted' within the last month.   
  
"So, Angel resources did some digging, you see? There was an odd discrepancy in the turnaround of your wish-granting compared to other angels. You go through many more than the average employee in record time."  
  
"But surely that's a good thing?" Dan interjects, "That means I'm efficient!"  
  
The CEO narrows his eyes, "Not quite. They did some looking back in some of these wishes and found many of them to be deserving of their wishes granted. Then they took a look at the wishes you did grant, all of them happened to come from females. Attractive females. Not all deserving. Some criminal. Given your reputation, that came as no surprise, and harboured very little doubt."  
  
"But--" Dan goes to interject again, but is quickly shut up by the daggers sent his way.  
  
"It almost seems like..." He takes a long pause, "Personal bias."   
  
"Y-you see..." Dan shrinks into himself a little, "How's about we just call it even and I try harder?"  
  
"Even? Avidan...I've given you so many chances because of your Father and I's close relationship, but this one I can't just let slide. You're aware of the Golden Rule?"

Dan sighs, crossing his arms and pouts, "I just can't seem to escape it today."  
  
"You may not know what happens when someone breaks the Golden Rule, but that's okay. You're here to find out today. A rare commodity."  
  
"Hold on." He stammers, "It's really not that serious."  
  
"Angels who break the Golden Rule get banished."  
  
The word 'banished' hits Dan like a train. It knocks the wind out of his sails and he's shocked into silence. Banished where? Banished? Is this guy serious? He didn't even know that was a real thing, or if that was something they could even do.  
  
"How odd." The CEO picks up a pen and spins it between his fingers, "It's not like you to be shocked silent, dear Daniel."   
  
"Banished...where?" He whispers.  
  
"Earth."  
  
Dan screams internally. Earth? This had to be some kind of cruel joke. If this was meant to scare him, they were doing a good job. He instantly regretted everything. He couldn't imagine being among all those mindless drones. Going through dull conversations. He wanted to die already.  
  
The CEO only continues as the pool of dread deepens in the bottom of Dan's stomach.  
  
"So...You'll also lose your wings and magic...and become a mortal. But it's not all bad. You do have a chance to earn your place in Heaven back. Your wings will be held up here while you complete a task within a set time period on Earth. I will give you..." He thinks for a moment, "Three months. Your task is as follows. You are to find one person the love of their life within these three months. However, this person thinks they have already found the love of their life, and recently he lost her. He doesn't think it exists anymore. Since wishes involving love seem to be your least favourite to grant, I'm sure this will be a valuable learning experience."   
  
Each word only makes Dan want to fade away more and more. No wings? No magic? A _mortal? LOVE?  
  
  
_Dan shakes his head, "Please...I can prove I can do this job properly, I just---please, let me prove it to you. Give me a second chance!"  
  
The CEO purses his lips, pressing a big red button underneath his desk and Dan starts to get hazy. Speech slurring as he still attempts to plead his case. His vision blurs and fizzles out. He stumbles forward, and eventually, he loses consciousness, only hearing the sound of something collapsing to the ground before falling headfirst into darkness. 


	2. Tweety Bird and the Big Cat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan's down on earth a new mortal, and along with his new demon taskmaster, Ross, he's gotta figure out how to get hired by Arin for the new co-host gig. However, neither of them are in the best of moods and Dan's task has only evolved in involve even worse consequences for incompletion!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! So thank you to all you guys who read the first chapter. I realise I'm the new little fish in a very big, ultra-talented pond! Seriously, some of these fics are so amazing you guys should get paid! 
> 
> Anyways, since this story takes place more or less a little after Jon left Game Grumps, Barry's still around, and Arin still has the blonde streak. Bear with me if I get some stuff wrong or make mistakes. I only started watching GG about three years ago, so I wasn't there through the whole beginning of the Dan saga.
> 
> I hope you enjoy :D Feel free to comment. (Also I copied this in from word so the spacing is a little weird in some places!

Woozy. So…woozy. 

Dan’s eyes crack open and the world around him rolls and swims in all directions, as the ocean does. His head pounds like it’s been cracked open and jumped on. He rolls over onto his back, staring up at the sky above him. Or really what looks more like a ceiling.  
  
“Oh good. You’re awake. It’s about time.” Someone purrs, just out of view.  
  
Dan groans softly, pausing tentatively as the distinct smell of smoke floods his nose. Not just any smoke though. All angels know this poignant smell. In elementary school you’re taught to avoid it, no matter the risk.

Demons.   
  
What happened before he woke up comes crashing back into Dan’s head, filling his empty consciousness like a tsunami. Swelling and bursting at the seams with questions and worries. Breaking the Golden Rule, getting banished. Oh, Heavens…what was going to happen now? What will happen to Brian, his sister, his parents? To him?   
  
A face he'd never seen before finally enters his line of vision above him. A slender man tilts his head, lips curled into a cruel grin. “Such a dirty bird! We need to give you a bath.”   
  
Dan wills what strength he has left into his arms, pushing himself up so he’s sitting upright. The man who was looking down at him moves back effortlessly, almost as if he were floating. He cocks his head back, crossing his arms over his chest tightly, blue eyes burning holes into Dan.   
  
This is when Dan notices two ram-like horns protruding from under his brown hair, and a whip-like tail curling behind him. “Who are you?” He manages to croak out before getting a better look at his surroundings. He sits in a relatively normal human apartment. The walls are decorated with band posters and the walls lined with shelves stacked with colourful CD albums. “Where are we?”  
  
The man in front of him grins again, “One question at a time, fairy boy. You angels are so stupid sometimes. Or should I say…you humans?”  
  
Dan glares at the demon until he realises what’s missing, trying to crane his neck around so fast he’s struck with whiplash, “M-my wings! They’re gone! Fuck, fucking fuck, shit, fuck! Are you serious? I’m wingless!” He cries, slumping back, “No…Man, no! I refuse. this can’t be happening!”  
  
“Sorry…I don’t make the rules.” The guy stretches, rolling his shoulders, “ As tiresome as that becomes. So, getting back to your questions. I’m Ross, I’m your taskmaster while you’re here on Earth.”  
  
“T-task master? But you’re a demon? How is that fair? That’s a fucking recipe for disaster if you ask me.”

“No one asked you, though. And they couldn’t put another angel in charge of your rehabilitation, could they? That would be _biased_. Coincidentally, that’s what you yourself are down here for in the first place. You know plenty about all that, now, don’t you?” Ross chuckles to himself, “They put us demons in charge of you defective angels because they know we aren’t gonna take any shit from you. Plus, we did offer. We love watching angels suffer.”  
  
“Prick.” Dan huffs, managing to scramble to his feet unsteadily, swaying back and forth, “Man…I feel like I’ve been in a flying accident.”  
  
“You’re a mortal now, Leigh. You mean _car_ accident.”  
  
“It’s Dan, and fuck you. I am _not_ a mortal. I fucking hate those bastards.”  
  
“You bastard. You are one of those bastards.” Ross tuts, shaking his head, “You have a lot to get used to. Do you remember a mention of that task monsieur cock-womble upstairs gave you?” Ross manifests a piece of paper in his hand in front of him, glancing up at Dan, “Find someone true love in three months. No mean feat, seemingly, but the fact he doesn’t even think it exists anymore makes this shit extra juicy!”   
  
Dan grumbles, walking over to the shelves to take a look at the CD’s, “Yeah, well, he’s right about that. Love doesn’t exist. It’s all just a farce.” Dan narrows his eyes, “And it hurts. It hurts like a mega-bitch.” He stamps his foot, spinning around to face Ross once more, “And I asked where the fuck we are!”  
  
“Your apartment.” Ross mutters breezily, avoiding what Dan had said about love, disappearing in a puff of smoke and reappearing right next to him, “Well, for three months.”  
  
“My apartment?” Dan mumbles in disbelief.

“What? You thought we’d just let you live on the streets? Your task is pretty specific. There are no stipulations regarding you living on the sidewalk throughout….though, you can if you want to. I think this place is pretty slick. I have a place in Hell, but if you don’t want a roof over your head, I’ll take it.

“No!” Dan interjects, waving his hands about, “It’s fine, I just…” Trailing off, he picks up a CD, “ _Rush?_ I don’t know who any of these bands are. I hardly know anything about Earth, except that I hate it.”

  
“Chin up, birdie. All the shit in here is tailored to your liking. You got a pretty sweet deal, even while this is supposed to be a punishment, or is it a rehabilitation? Whatever. Either way, in Hell we’d just cut your organs out and show them to you instead, but angels deal with things a bit differently.”

Dan makes a face, “Yeah, okay.” He goes quiet for a bit, “So are you gonna tell me more about my task or what? I don’t have all day.”  
  
“You have three months, actually.” Ross smirks, pulling a stopwatch out of his pocket and pressing a button, “But I’m nice and gave you a 10-minute head start. Anyway, you know the basics. Love, one person, blah blah. Bullshit, bullshit, but here’s where it gets really interesting!”  
  
Dan scoffs, “As if this wasn’t already interesting enough.” He sighs sarcastically.  
  
“Well, via the information in your file… and yes, I did my homework, you’re not the type who takes instruction very well, so there’s a little ‘incentive’ to make sure you get cracking on your rehabilitation ASAP.” He leans against the shelves, “If you dawdle, refuse to work on the task, or even come to me and tell me you give up, well.” He has to stifle a laugh, “You will remain a mortal forever.” 

Dan blinks as he processes that fate. A human? Forever? He wasn’t sure he could even handle that. The body stinks already, and what if he got so used to it he started to become a boring, under-achieving dolt like the rest of them? The thought made him want to be ill. 

“You’re lying.”  
  
“I never lie. Well, I do, when it suits me. But that’s not now.” He hands the paper to Dan, “See, it’s right there in black and white.” He jabs that sentence, leaving a crease behind.  
  
Dan gulps, shaking his head in incredulity. “This is ridiculous. How is this gonna work anyway? Walk up to him on the street and be all ‘Hey man, this is gonna sound really weird but I gotta find you the love of your life!’ and he’ll just agree like that? Yeah, that’s gonna go down really well. Human’s are stupid, but they’re not _that_ dumb.”  
  
“Well, you _could_ do that if you so choose, or you could go to the interview I lined up for you this afternoon. Get to know him, gain his trust. Put your little actor hat on and pretend to be friendly? Y’see. Dude’s semi-internet famous. He runs a little gaming show on _Youtube._ Recently his co-host moved onto bigger and better things so he’s running interviews for a new partner. He’s not really in the best of moods since a bit of a messy divorce a few months ago, so no one’s really tickled his fancy yet.” Ross leans in, “And that’s where you come in.”  
  
Dan leans back to get away from the smell of smoke wafting off Ross, “Are you serious? _Youtube?_ That little human website where celebrity wannabe’s go to die? Why are you making me lower myself down to such a level?” He whines, heading over to the couch and collapsing on it, covering his face, “Alright, alright, alright. Sounds like a deal. But how do we know he’s gonna hire me?”  
  
“Well, if you try hard enough he will. This is the only favour I’m gonna do for you. To get the ball rolling and all that good stuff. If you fuck this up then it’s up to you to get close to him some other way.” Ross reappears behind the couch, leaning over to look at Dan, “His name is Arin Hanson, by the way.” 

Arin. Dan hated that name. It reminded him too much of the name Erin. The name of his very first love and the name of someone who scorned him in cold blood. He could feel the heat that name brought him creep up his neck. Fuck. This was gonna be one hell of a rollercoaster. He hoped he’d wake up in his bed and it would all just be a nightmare. Although, there seemed to be no chance of that now.   
  
“Arin…” Dan let the name drip off his tongue like it tasted bad, “You have no idea how much I hate this already.”  
  
Ross nods, “Oh, I do. And it’s absolutely delicious. Mmm…feed me your former angel tears!” He tumbles over the back of the couch, straddling him and hovering above him, “Oh…and one more thing.”  
  
Dan’s eyes go wide and he shoves Ross up and away so hard that he lands on his ass on the floor next to Dan, “What the fuck are you doing?”   
  
Ross hisses, forked tongue slipping out of his mouth as he concentrates on getting back onto his feet, rubbing the bottom of his spine, “Fuck you, man. Touchy motherfucker. Listen.” He sighs, “I’ve done myself the favour of getting a job there too, so if you manage to kick your brain into gear and get yourself a job there, I’ll be there all the time, watching everything you do, for the whole time. Forever.” 

“That doesn’t make all of this any more appealing.” Dan rolls his eyes. Sitting up on the couch, watching Ross uneasily so he doesn’t try anything else. “But a job with the guy does fix the issue of getting in a close enough proximity to him, so…” He watches the ceiling fan swing above him, “When and where is the interview?”  
  
Ross looks to the clock on the wall, “Half an hour? And the place is about…half an hour away.”  
  
“ _What?_ ” Dan exclaims, leaping off the couch and running out the door, not even taking anything with him, not that he had anything in the first place, and stopping in the middle of the hallway outside. Oh yeah, he’s never been here before, and he doesn’t know where he’s going.   
  
Ross shakes his head, following Dan outside, suddenly his horns and tail disappeared into thin air. “I’ll drive you. And you’ll need this.” He hands a phone to Dan, “Human’s use their phone for everything. Communication mostly. If you’re gonna be this guy’s co-host, you’re gonna gain a following pretty fast, so try and familiarise yourself with human social media platforms. Make a few accounts on the big ones. _Instagram. Twitter. Facebook. Reddit.”_

Dan looks down at the phone. They were so primitive. A basic touch screen. The ones in Heaven projected your home screen up into the air in front of you. Also, angels had learned many millennia ago that digital communication only took the life out of talking with others, so most neglected to use such methods and instead desired to meet up in real life. As Dan had assumed, Humans are lazy. 

Dan pouts, opting to stay quiet and follow Ross to the car, huffing and climbing into the passenger's seat. As Ross pulled out of the parking lot and down the streets, Dan started to wonder how he was gonna pretend to be friendly with the human. He had such enormous hate for them, it was going to be like the acting job of his life. 

He watches the streets go by, looking up at the tall buildings, all the humans shuffling down the streets. They were all talking and smiling like nothing was wrong. Like they didn’t know how underdeveloped they were. The only reason angels even took the form of humans was because it was one of the easiest forms to maintain, with the most useful extremities, Like fingers, and opposable thumbs, for example. It was also more compact. You could fit hundreds of humans into a room where you could only fit a dozen or so real angel forms. 

After a long silence of Dan trying to figure out how the hell he got himself into such a dire situation, he opens his mouth. 

“Where are we?” He asks, more to himself than anyone, but Ross answers anyway. 

“Los Angeles, California. But you Dan, are from New Jersey.” 

“New Jersey? Why New Jersey?” He blinks.  


“I dunno. That’s what the angels put on your passport and ID. Maybe because Hanson’s never been there? I have no idea. It just means you can make shit up and Arin doesn’t really have any way to verify you’re telling the truth.” Dan feels the car take a hard right and then a building comes into view. “Here we are!”  
  
Dan is sent reeling, “So fast?”  


“Mm…Dude. You were daydreaming most of the way. Now put a smile on.”  


Dan watches as Ross gets out of the car and he feels his soul escape him. Suddenly he’s nervous. He’d never fully grasped the gravity of the situation. It was still like some sick joke for him. Like a terrible but fantastical dream. 

Alright. He’d need to grow a pair of balls. Be someone he isn’t. Be Mr Friendly. Mr Funny Man. Mr Business. He closes his eyes and plasters a smile on his face. Honestly, it felt foreign. He pushes open the car door with as much confidence as he can muster, following Ross inside. 

Ross greets everyone once he gets inside and they all wave back to him, greeting him like he wasn’t a fucking demon who reeked of smoke. Someone approaches them. A smaller guy with shining eyes and a beard. “Hey Ross!” He seems pleased, “Who’s this?” The kindly man eyes Dan.   
  
“This is Leigh Avidan. He’s auditioning for the co-host role, Barry.”   


“Oh?” Barry blinks, taking a closer look at Dan, “You must be crazy.” He laughs heartily, “Arin’s always in such a sour mood now, even the lovelies are starting to pick up on it.”

“I’m Dan…not Leigh. And…the lovelies?” Dan mumbles.

“Our Youtube fans, man. Remember I told you that’s what they’re called?” Ross shoots him a look.

Dan nods, “Oh yeah!” He smiles widely, “Duh! I’m like, super forgetful sometimes. Call me Mr Am-Amnesia... Amnesia- Mr Amnesia man! Solid save.” He high-fives himself goofily, “God, that was dumb.”  
  
Barry laughs again, “Alright Mr Amnesia man. Well, since we don’t really have a line out the door waiting for this job, Arin’s office is just through there. Knock and see if he can even be bothered to open it.”  
  
Dan follows the way Barry’s finger was pointing and Ross pats him on the back, “Good luck, Buddy.” He gives Dan a smile but his eyes read differently. Dan hesitates a little before attempting to will his balls to be even bigger.   
  
Dan stares at the door with a plaque that reads ‘Arin Hanson.’ He’s got a sick feeling in his gut. The plaque reminds him of Heaven and what got him into this mess in the first place. He knocks firmly after a little back-and-forth. 

He hears a short curse come from inside the office and some shuffling of papers. Then the door flies open in front of his face, so fast it makes his hair blow back. 

A man stands in the doorway. He’s shorter than Dan by a small margin, with hair that cuts off at his chin. A blonde streak breakups the brown, He has a moustache growing through and is wearing a bright pink hoodie. Despite the colour of the hoodie, the dark circles under his eyes indicate he’s struggling through something. He looks like Dan after a week-long bender.   
  
While Dan stands there wordlessly, Arin shifts irritably, “Yeah? What?” He turns around, heading back to his desk, “Who even are you?”  
  
Dan already doesn’t like this guy just by the tone Arin was using but forces an easy-going, calm smile onto his face. “How’s it going, man? I’m Dan. Dan Avidan…I’m here to audition for the co-host…thingy.”  
  
Arin arches an eyebrow. He looks to his computer, probably where he keeps his schedule. “Oh…right.” He breathes out shakily, leaning on his desk and dropping his head to compose himself before looking back up at Dan, forcing an equally as easy-going smile. “Arin. Uh…My name. My name is Arin. Hi.” He looks to the clock, “You wanna go eat?”  
  
Dan pauses, “What?”

Dan had never been for many interviews at all. Actually, he’d only ever been to one, but he was absolutely sure they never involved going out to eat. 

“Like…out to eat… sushi?” Arin grabs his stuff, “The whole gig is like…how well we get along and shit so…” He looks to Dan, “Come get sushi with me and we’ll figure that out.”   
  
Dan stares at Arin for a while, “W-Well…I mean…you’re not wrong.”  
  
“Right? So, let’s go. C’mon. I’ll drive.” 


	3. O Ye of Little Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan is out at lunch with Arin, and at first, the conversation seems stilted. However, when they finally get into it, Dan manages to distract Arin from his sadness. They seem to gel and Dan gets Arin laughing and talking, and they start to craft a bond, leading to Dan landing the job, getting his task off to a rocking start.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeey :)  
> So I know I seem to be posting these chapters at the speed of light, and I appreciate all the hits I've been getting. It still gets me anxious each time I post. Thank you to everyone who keeps reading, comments and leaves kudos. You've got me feeling good. 
> 
> I feel very lucky to be in a group of such talented writers.  
> Enjoy this chapter~ I hope it's alright. 
> 
> :D

Dan sits across from Arin quietly. The car ride to the restaurant had been less than stellar. It had been silent and awkward the whole way. It was becoming quite clear to Dan that the reason why this position wasn’t filled wasn’t wholly because of the lack of talent concerning the possible candidates, but instead Arin himself.  
  
Dan knew enough about love personally that he knew it could destroy your trust in everyone and everything, but Dan wasn’t about to dive straight into that with some guy he didn’t know. The fate of remaining a mortal loomed and he knew better than to start pressing a recent divorcee and rubbing more salt into the wound, but he just didn’t know where the hell to start.

Arin met Dan’s eyes for a second and didn’t look impressed, almost like he already knew this was a waste of time. 

“So you said your name was Dan? What do you do? Or what did you do before trying for this job?”  
  


Dan is caught off by the question. He felt stupid. He had a whole ass car ride to try and figure out an optimal life story, but he didn’t know what to say. He couldn’t say his main hobbies included fucking mad bitches. Dan tried to remember what he used to do for fun as a teenager instead, before starting his job. He vaguely remembered writing some stupid songs with Brian, with crude and imaginative lyrics that no angels would ever approve of.  
  


“I’m…I was a singer…or songwriter. You know. Low-key stuff. You’d never find any evidence of it, it was so low-key.”  
  


Arin puffs his cheeks out, “Tough career path, I guess. What kinda stuff did you write?”  
  


Dan blinks like a confused deer. but in the end, decides that he has nothing to lose by just singing something of a song he remembers.

“Everybody, shut up! I have an erection, it only happens eighty-seven times a day. Just stop what you’re doing and witness penis perfection! Please hold your applause…”  
  


Arin just stares at him for a bit and Dan thinks he saw something light behind Arin’s eyes. The few silent seconds between them feels like an eternity.  
  
Is Dan fucking stupid? What the fuck? Who just…bursts out in song about dicks over a business lunch? He could’ve just been all ‘Oh, some lame comedy stuff…’ but no. He had to go and sing. Real life isn’t a musical, Dan. 

He’d fucked it already. Dan didn’t even have anything to go off of. If Ross had given him a little more time he might’ve had the time to watch some of this ‘Game Grumps’ bullshit so he knew what angle to shoot from. Instead, he was here looking like a pervert. However, that was only until Arin lost his composure and a smile finally graces his features.  
  


Arin leans back in his chair, putting the menu down in his lap, dropping his head back. His laugh was so loud and clear and it was just another thing that caught Dan by surprise. 

“Oh man!” Arin giggles, finally calming down after a little, “Was all your stuff like that? If it was, I dunno why you didn’t make it. That stuff would make it pretty big on _Youtube._ ”  
  


“Really?” Dan remembers to put a smile back on his face, “I mean…I guess. It’s just…I guess people in the community at the time would probably find it in poor taste.”  
  


“I’m no singer, but I always thought it’d be kinda cool to write a comedy album. It’s like…a really under-appreciated genre. Plus it requires talent, you know? You never know what people are gonna find funny. It’s all subjective.” 

Dan shrugs. “Why didn’t you do it? You have the platform, don’t you?”  
  


“Well, yeah. But we’re only known for one thing, one type of comedy. I couldn’t do it by myself. Yeah, I have an animation channel, that’s where I started on _Youtube,_ but that’s just it, animation. Music is a whole other ballpark. My cohost didn’t really know anything about that either.” 

Dan tilts his head, “I’m not sure ‘just animation’ is a good representation of how long it takes to animate.” He’d granted a few wishes of chicks in the past who wanted to learn how to animate, “It’s difficult, it takes forever. You have to learn and be good at drawing. If you found some fame from animating, it’s not really anything to sneeze at, honestly."

Arin looks at Dan like that meant something, “Mm… I don’t really do it so much anymore. I really wanted Game Grumps to take off instead. I just got so caught up in wanting to make it work I guess I never really thought about what would happen if it fell apart. Oh yeah, that reminds me. Why should I choose you?”  
  


“Choose me?”  
  


“Yeah, like a pokèmon.” Arin teases, “No. Obviously I mean as a new cohost?”  
  


This was it. He had to sell himself, but what was he good at besides eating stale vending machine food and flailing his dick around? He picks thoughtfully at the skin around his thumb.

“Ahaha…good question.” Dan falters, looking everywhere but Arin, eventually deciding he’s just going to have to be honest. “Look, man, I’m gonna level with you. I don’t really know too much about gaming.” That was true. Video games in Heaven were different. They took place in a full virtual reality pod where you could touch, feel and experience. They didn’t happen on a screen. It was more tactile. Dan didn’t know the first thing about human games, “But I think it’s special…”  
  
Arin looks interested. “What’s special?”  
  
Dan doesn’t know where he found these next words. They didn’t sound like a lie he thought up on the spot. It sounded like something real, but it still surprised himself when he heard himself say it. “Creating a community. Enriching someone’s life so far away by just…making them feel like part of a group. A team. A friend.” 

Dan stares directly into his glass of water after speaking, like it might save him the embarrassment of acting like it was such a deep thing. Maybe Dan had felt like this all along. It’d already become clear he didn’t really fit in in Heaven, so maybe he really did want a community, but he wasn’t exactly sure a dumb internet community was the one he wanted or the one he deserved.

He continues, “Or is that dumb?” 

Arin considers this, spinning the straw in his drink between his thumb and forefinger while he ponders the answer Dan had given, “I feel like a lot of people look for a community on _Youtube_. I mean, growing up I was always this weird kid. I wasn’t popular. Didn’t have too many friends. _Youtube_ gave me an outlet to express my weirdness somewhere where it might be appreciated, and I found my ‘people’.” He looks off to the side, laughing softly “Oh my God…What am I doing?” 

“Huh?” Dan looks at Arin. His face holds a slightly new light, as if he just figured something out.  
  


“I guess I kinda forgot how important _Youtube_ is to me. I’d been so caught in the negative things that happened recently, I guess losing my cohost on top of that meant the end of all I had worked to build to me. I was just so ready to give up."  
  


Dan still doesn’t know exactly what he means, “Ah?” 

“It probably sounds stupid, but I’ve spent weeks looking for a cohost and it’s not them that sucks like I thought it was. It’s me and my attitude. Obviously no one’s gonna be the same as Jon, but I have to take that step or I really will lose everything.” He sighs, “And everyone has been so supportive and it just sucks. I can’t pull myself out of this slump.”  
  


Dan kind of relates. He feels a bit like he was in a slump himself. Doing the same job every day. Going to the same bar every day. Granting the same wishes for the same type of girl everyday. 

“Um…it’s okay, man. We’re all in a slump sometimes.” Dan kind of wants to reach across the table and pat the guy on the shoulder. He tries to remind himself that Arin is just a human, and he’s just got simple, superficial feelings but…the guy just looked so crushed. “Even though I don’t really know what’s been going on with you…” Dan lies, that’s the whole stupid reason he’s here. “You can always find a way out.”  
  
Dan keeps lying. It’s like it’s natural now. If he couldn’t get out of his own slump, how was he supposed to help guide Arin out of his? Or maybe he could just help Arin find someone who could. Gotta keep his mind on track! Not here to help him. Here to find him love! 

Arin gives him a thankful look, though small, “I think it’s easier said than done, Daniel.”  
  


“Daniel?” Dan makes a face, chuckling lightly, “Gross! I almost hate that worse than Leigh!”

“Why, Daniel? Is it too biblical?” Arin jokes, “Does me saying your name like this bother you, Daniel? If I am your boss, Daniel. I’m going to have to say your name sometimes, Daniel.”  
  


“Ain’t no one the boss of me!” Dan protests but then it dawns on him, “Wait…what? Boss?”  
  


Arin shrugs, looking back to the menu, “‘M just testing how it would feel to say it. Hypothetically, if I was your boss.” 

Dan watches Arin like he’s the most interesting specimen he’d ever come into contact with. This big, sad, teddy bear in a bright pink hoodie. Though he’s hurting, he still has it somewhere in him to run a business, to make jokes.  
  


“Hey! I almost thought you just hired me! You can’t just say shit like that! It gets people excited.” He leans in close, across the table, “What if you made me get a boner?” He feigns a worried expression.  
  


Arin looks a little surprised by how close Dan is when he looks up, “Well then, wouldn’t you want everyone to know about it? That’s what you say in your song.” He tilts his head, a mischievous grin coming over his face, leaning back and tapping the shoulder of the guy on the table behind them, who turns to look at them questioningly.  
  


“Hey man, I just gave this guy an erec-“  
  


Dan panics, “An EXCITING piece of news!” He shoots a very firm look at Arin, “So exciting! I’m gonna be his cohost!”  
  


The guy wavers, looking even more confused, “Con…congratulations?” He turns back to enjoying his meal, giving his girlfriend a weird look.

Arin crumbles into hysterics and Dan flushes. What was with this guy? You don’t just tell random people about your dick! 

“Dude! What is wrong with you! The song was a joke.” He pouts, but he can barely keep a scowl on his face with how much Arin is laughing. “Plus…that is not how you pick up chicks!” 

“I don’t wanna pick up chicks.” Arin manages to get out, wiping tears from his cheeks after laughing so hard, “Oh man…That was gold.”  
  


Dan lightens up just a little, “Plus! If he knew I had such a massive, gorgeous, majestic erection he wouldn’t be able to stop staring. It would consume his mind, soul and being. He’d achieve spiritual enlightenment and become one with the sun. And his girlfriend would get angry, and I, Leigh Daniel Avidan, am no home wrecker.” 

Arin nods. “Right. Right, I can’t wait to achieve spiritual enlightenment when I get to see it. I’ll make our penises kiss.” 

_“Arin._ ” Dan says firmly, “Just shut up and order already. We’ve been sitting here with no food for, like, 20 minutes.”  
  


Dan hadn’t noticed until they were finally both quiet again, looking at their menus, that he had quite enjoyed their banter. He almost forgot how much he hated humans for a second, but not for long. There was just something weird about Arin. It was like…he wasn’t as shitty and basic as the rest of them. Maybe something, somewhere inside of Dan had become greased up and he _actually_ felt bad for a human for once. Maybe it was just him getting focused on his task. He preferred the latter.

He wondered what else was going to come from lunch from Mr Hanson. If that conversation they had was just a one-off or if it was something special. Either way, Dan was suddenly feeling pretty confident in getting the job. So confident in fact, they might as well just give him his wings back right now. Piece of cake.

———

“No Arin! That’s the _bishop_. The horse-man is a _knight!_ You dumb fuck!”

Dan and Arin rolled back into the grumps office after lunch, completely caught up in their conversation that they didn’t notice everyone staring.

“How am I dumb, Dan? What the fuck makes that piece a bishop? What is a bishop anyways? Who cares? Chess sucks!”  
  


“Arin. For fucks sake. A bishop is a high standing member of a Christian clergy, Fuck. Even I know that! The fucking piece has a fucking _cross_ on the top of it, you dolt.”

Arin fakes frowning, crossing his arms over his chest, “Avidan. Are we gonna come to blows?”  
  


“What. You think you can come at me? Danny Sexbang, bringer of the great bangs? Do you quarrel, sir?”

“I quarrel big time! In fact. I only have one word to say to you!”  
  


Dan raises an eyebrow as Arin heads for his office. 

“And what is that?”

“Hired!” Arin grins, “Someone get him the paperwork to sign or whatever the fuck we do here. I barely remember.” He continues to the rest of the office. “Avidaniel.” Arin looks back to Dan, “We start tomorrow. You better come prepared. People aren’t gonna like someone new right away.”  
  


Dan shrugs, “Maybe they’ll like me better when they realise I’ve managed to teach you what a bishop is.”  
  


Arin chuckles, “Shut your whore mouth.” He heads into his office, closing the door behind him. 

Dan turns to where Ross is stationed, shooting him a shit-eating grin. 

Ross rolls his eyes whilst everyone else seems so surprised to see Arin in a much better mood. 

“So you’ve managed to distract him from his sadness for a couple of hours.” Ross comments, coming over to Dan and lowering his voice, pretending to welcome him to the team, “Congratulations. Now see if you can keep that shit up. You can’t fix a man in a day.”  
  
“O ye of little faith.” Dan purrs, “I know, but at least I got my foot in the door.”


	4. Three Months

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Arin sit for their first session of Game Grumps, and it goes well as far as they can tell. Arin is worried about how the fans will react and has to wait to see if the hate for his new cohost will ever subside. In the meantime, Dan wonders if it's just easier to actually try to enjoy his time here, and be genuinely friendly, instead of just putting up an act. He's feeling good until Ross reminds him of the three-month time period, and Dan starts to wonder if that's long enough. While he ponders this, a mysterious package shows up at his door that both complicates and simplifies life for Dan while he's mortal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back again~  
> Posting chapters like it's my job, clearly.   
> I'm still getting the world-building out of the way but hopefully, this should be the last chapter before I can really start doing some character diving. Those of you who have left kudos and comments, thank you! And feel free to keep doing so, if you're so inclined.  
> ♡

Arin drifted into the office the day after he had hired Dan, deep in thought. Though he had been confident in his choice of Dan the day before, he couldn’t shake the lingering doubt he had. It didn’t matter if Arin liked him in the end, it was if the fans liked him. After all, what was GG without the fans? They were all fans who had joined the community on the promise that it would be he and Jon playing games, now, bringing on a whole new person…would any of them stick around? Would the channel continue to grow? 

Arin knew, as with most things concerning the internet, nobody appreciated change, and he knew Dan would get hate for a while. It was just a waiting game to see if that would ever subside. Arin hadn’t even checked with Dan if he could handle that kind of negative attention. Arin huffed, but again, the idea of Dan had stuck with him all night. There was something about the guy that was different. He had a weird…kind of…edge that Arin was looking for in possible incoming cohost candidates. 

Arin was shaken from his internal monologue by Barry entering his line of sight, “Kinda blocking the passageway here, man.”   
  


Arin blinks, spinning around and realising he had stopped to think right in the middle of the hall. 

“Oh. Sorry.” He mumbles, stepping to the side so people could get through. 

Barry smiles, “So…you excited about your first day with the new guy? Dan? Ross seemed pretty confident he would impress you and it looks like he really did! Yesterday was the first time in a while we’ve seen you back to normal.”  
  


“Oh?” It wasn’t so much a question as something to reply with. Arin thought back to yesterday and he did remember feeling a little more at peace after Dan left, having had a good time with him. Over lunch they seemed to really click. He hoped it wasn’t just a one time thing, and the thought of seeing Dan for the second time today struck the bottom of his stomach with nervous energy. “I mean….’excited’ is an interesting word choice.”   
  


Barry nods in understanding, “Don’t worry. We’re all at battle stations ready for the oncoming onslaught of hate from the fans. We’re all ready for it. I’m not sure about Dan but…he seems like a cool guy, I’m sure he knows how it is.”

Arin shifts uneasily, “Right. Well—“ He goes to respond but is quickly cut off by the new voice in the building.   
  


“God _damn it_ , Ross!” 

Arin looks over his shoulder to see Dan walking in with Ross, who has a devious smirk on his face.   
  


Dan looks tired, but weirdly enough, did not look like shit in the least. He actually could really pull off the whole bed-head vibe. Arin kind of envied that. He needs at least 20 minutes in the morning and a strong cup of coffee to look even human. 

Dan looks away from Ross for a second and catches Arin’s gaze, shooting him a million-dollar smile. He split off from Ross who heads to his desk and approaches Arin easily, looking like a rockstar in his oversized hoodie and ripped black jeans. “Mornin’ cohost.” 

“Don’t you mean ‘Morning Boss’?” Arin quips in somewhat of a knee-jerk reaction to Dan. 

Dan kept the grin on his face, “Oh yeah. Guess you’re right about that. Morning _Boss._ ” He gives him a lazy salute and a wink.  
  


Arin hadn’t realised yesterday but this guy was most definitely attractive. Arin didn’t know anyone quite like him. He had a quality to him that was foreign to Arin. It was almost otherworldly and wild. Unwieldy confidence that Arin himself was lacking. 

Arin definitely had a ‘camera’ persona that he presented. Crude, brash but fun and lively. However, offline, while still holding some of those qualities, the quiet artsy kid that he was in school never quite left him. This left him with some unresolved insecurities. While he was married to Suzy, he never worried too much about impressing people, he always had her to fall back on. Although now it was just him again, he felt more vulnerable than ever.

Regardless, Arin quickly killed his thoughts about Dan’s attractiveness, strangled them out until it was like they never existed. Though he was no longer married, it still felt like he was being unfaithful even noticing someone else had a nice face…or whatever. 

Arin clears his throat, forcing a smile onto his face, “So…you ready to record?”   
  


Dan nods, “I think so. I did lots and lots of research last night, just to check I was really kinda, in the right headspace, y’know? I’m not sure I can replicate exactly what you and Jon had. Your banter is somethin’ special, but I was thinking…well, you and I can probably build something new of our own, and see if that sticks?” 

Arin shrugs, “Well. You’re _not_ Jon, so no pressure to replicate him. Seriously. It’s not a big deal. They’re gonna hate you for the first few weeks anyway.” Arin saw a short flash of uncertainty cross Dan’s face, and cursed himself for being so honest. “Whoa, hey, but I’m confident that’ll change after they get to know you and we all get comfortable.” Arin gestured for Dan to follow him to the recording room.

———

Dan didn’t know why his heart was in his throat. He’d watched hours of GG last night. So much he fell asleep to the sound of Arin’s laughter and woke up to more of their videos autoplaying. 

He wasn’t stupid. He knew he’d have to figure out exactly what his new job was, but up until he sat down on the couch, surrounded by all the equipment and stuff, he’d felt confident. Now he felt the same butterflies you feel just before you’d go out on stage. 

Arin pulled out a game, “ _Punch Out_!” He waves it in Dan’s face, “Heard of it?”

Dan shakes his head, “Naw…but…it looks like a boxing game, and sounds like one too, frankly.”   
  


“Bingo!” Arin nods, “You got that right, Avidaniel.” He turns to set up the game and consoles. giving Dan a better opportunity to steel himself.   
  


“So…how does this work exactly?” He tapped the mic pinned to his shirt, “We just start playing and be funny?”  
  


“Pretty much.” Arin glances at him for a moment, “You get the hang of it pretty quickly, honestly. It’s less about the game, and usually just about random shit. So no pressure. Just be yourself.”

“Just be myself?”   
  


Dan _hated_ the sound of that. This whole time he’d been on Earth, even though at this point it was just a one day stint, he’d been anything _but_ himself. ‘Himself’ was an angel. A confident, sparkly, infinitely attractive angel. Now he was just a boring human. A human who didn’t know what he was doing, that got himself into a job he had no idea how to do, to complete a task he had no expertise in. 

Dan pondered his new persona. This friendly guy who was just here to have a good time. Would it be so bad to try and _be_ this guy instead of just emulate it? He could see acting this person out becoming excessively exhausting the more he did it. So…would it be easier to just try to…be friendly? Try to enjoy himself while he was here? It couldn’t be impossible. He’s enjoyed himself with Arin yesterday. 

Dan sighs but hardens his resolve. Objective one, try and have fun. Earth was his punishment, but he felt that maybe if he had a good time, it’d be an even bigger ‘fuck you’ to the people in Heaven once he returned. Like, a whole ‘You can’t keep a guy down’ kind of thing. 

Arin hands a controller to him, “So, I know you don’t play video games a lot, after what you told me yesterday so…that’s fine. I’ll just explain the controls to you and you’ll pick it up super easy. Trust me.”

_Trust me._

It sounded so nice coming from Arin, so Dan decided to do just that. He watched Arin as he explained the controller to him, looking back up to his face occasionally, and finally, the confidence that was in him this morning started to reappear again.

———  
  
Dan returned home after the grumps session. He took a cab since Ross was still working. 

However, as far as Arin had seen, Dan had ‘Really hit the ground running.’ 

Despite knowing nothing about human games, or being an entertainer, Dan seemed to really have a knack for it as long as it was with Arin. There was no awkwardness and they seemed to gel even better than they did yesterday at lunch. 

Now he was at home alone, he was still kind of buzzing off the energy that he had generated at the grumps recording. He hoped the fans would give him a chance because this definitely seemed to be the closest and easiest way to get to Arin. 

He noted a calendar hanging off the wall near the kitchen in his apartment. He raised an eyebrow and made his way to it. It looked very skinny like it didn’t have enough pages, and already, a single day was crossed off in red ink. 

Pulling it off the wall he flipped through two more pages. The final page, had a big red circle on the final day, with a small doodle of a pair of wings on it. 

“Do you like it?” 

Dan yelped in shock, spinning around to face whoever was talking to him.

“I made it especially for you!” Ross beamed, “Do you know how hard it is to find a calendar of only three months?”  
  


Dan’s shoulders slumped, and he rolled his eyes, hanging the calendar back up, “How sweet. You shouldn’t have.” 

Ross leans on the wall next to Dan, the smile just as prominent, “You should be nicer to me! We’re sort of in the same boat here. I’m not good enough to be in Heaven, and coincidentally, neither are you!” 

“Aren’t you supposed to be, I don’t know, at _work?_ Isn’t that why you couldn’t drive me home?” 

“I am at work as far as everyone knows, in the bathroom. I just thought I’d stop by in the meantime to see how you’re doing.” 

Dan walks over to a full-length mirror, staring at himself. He didn’t have the same Heavenly glow that all angels carried usually. The sparkle in his eyes, diminished; the sharpness of his jaw, dulled; his wings, missing. He wondered if it was like losing an arm or leg for humans. What was that called, phantom limb syndrome? He could still feel them there, he could still flex the muscles in his back he’d need to lift them. 

“I’m fine, Ross. The grump session went good. If you’re so interested, you can watch it when it’s posted later. You can go now. You stink up the whole place like smoke.” Dan sighs.   
  


Ross looks between Dan and the calendar, “You know this calendar is a tool to help you, right? A constant reminder you are on task. A task that, if you leave incomplete, could keep you here forever. As you are until you die, like a mortal.”  
  


“They really must be thinking you have awful indigestion since you’ve been gone so long.” Dan remarks, hoping he’s been able to avoid what Ross had been saying. He was starting to think, even on his second day, that three months seemed like a measly amount of time to figure out someone’s love life. It seems Dan’s hope about Ross had been dashed as quickly as it arrived.   
  


Ross comes behind him in the mirror, “Don’t you look upset! An angel losing faith…how ironic! Well. You’re right, I really must be going. Nice seeing you. I’ll be back, so stay decent.” 

Ross disappears in a puff of smoke and Dan lets out a groan, about to collapse back onto the couch until the doorbell rings.

“What now?” He grumbles, heading over to open the door, expecting to see someone there, but lo and behold, no one stood in front of him. Confused, he glanced down the deserted hallway outside his door. Then, once he finally looked down he noticed a small package. 

It was wrapped in pale blue paper, inconspicuous with no return address and just a tag labelled, “Dan”. 

Dan took a seat and tore open the package, pulling out another human phone, and an envelope. Setting the phone aside he opened the envelope to read the letter. 

_Dan,_

_I hope all is well where you are. I had to do some highly illegal digging to find out what even happened to you after you went to see the CEO. I guess now even I know what happens once you break the Golden Rule. Didn’t I tell you to watch out for that?_

_Regardless, I’m here to help you out with the task they set for you. I’ve enchanted this phone so you can contact me in Heaven when no one else is around. I’ve figured since you don’t know anyone down on Earth, it’ll be easier for you—given my access to human files—which people to pair Arin Hanson up with if I give you some pointers._

_Keep in mind, what I’m doing is highly dangerous for both you and I. Me because I will be banished too if I am found out for helping you. You, because your task will be immediately ended for cheating— but I want you back up here. So, with that said, here are a couple of rules regarding the phone._

_Firstly, make sure no one, including the demon handling you, does not know this phone exists. It complicates things for you and makes other humans suspicious of your activities. Secondly, burn this letter. Don’t just put it in the trash. The demon will find it. Finally, discard of the box somewhere he will not see it._

_I hope to see you soon._

_Best wishes and luck,_

_Brian_

Dan sits there, staring at the letter in complete amazement. 

“Damn Bri. You’ve got some balls.” 


	5. My Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been two weeks and Dan has made little to no progress. Brian, in an attempt to help, urges Dan to take Arin out for a day of fun to try to convince him to tell Dan the divorce story, figuring it's probably best Dan knows what happened before trying to set Arin up with anyone else. 
> 
> Dan agrees and takes Arin to an arcade to play some games, but eventually ends up opening up to Arin about his own painful past relationship instead, in hopes that it might convince Arin to spill his own. 
> 
> It works, but it leaves Dan feeling crappy as he had to relive his own painful past. However, Dan's openness also softens Arin's feelings about his new cohost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all the kind comments and kudos! 
> 
> Please keep in mind, I absolutely adore Arin and Suzy and would never wish for anything to come between them. The divorce is only a plot device. <3
> 
> I do this weird thing where sometimes I accidentally switch between past and present tense. I've tried to correct it through this chapter but if you come across some of it cut me a little slack, lol.
> 
> This chapter is significantly longer than the last few but I hope that's cool with you. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

\---

“Two weeks and you’ve gotten nowhere?”  


Dan rolls his eyes, holding the special new handphone Brian had gifted him between his cheek and shoulder, picking a couple CD’s off the shelving unit, letting his eyes drift over the song indexes printed on the back of them. 

“I don’t feel solid enough yet, Bri. Yeah, I’m in _Game Grumps,_ but the fans are still getting used to me. You should see some of these comments, though. For every one of them accepting me, there’s ten more denouncing me. I don’t have a stable enough foundation yet to make an in-way concerning Arin’s love life.” 

Dan had been keeping Brian updated on the general goings-on and advancements he’d been making since he got the phone. So far he’d been able to keep the phone and his conversations with Heaven a secret, but the pang of anxiety in his stomach never lessened every time he fished it out from behind the toilet, where he’d been hiding it.  
  
The past two weeks had gone by in a flash and Dan was starting to get antsy. A fortnight was already gone in his twelve-week period on Earth, and it was starting to feel like it’d be a whole lot longer than that if he didn’t get a move on. 

“Need I remind you of your time limit?” Brian muses on the other side of the phone.

Dan goes silent for a bit, his eyes flitting over to the three-month calendar from Ross tacked onto his wall, “Contrary to the popular belief of you and Ross, I’m constantly reminded of it.” Dan opens one of the CD cases, pulling one of the discs out, heading over to the old school stereo system installed, turning the volume way down and letting the tracks play. Strangely enough, he was really starting to enjoy some of this Earth people music.  
  
“May I offer a suggestion?”  
  
“If I said no, would you still do it?”  
  
“Probably.”  
  
“Then no.”  
  
Brian laughs gruffly, “Listen, do you ever see Arin outside of work?” Dan could hear Brian leafing through a few papers probably from Arin’s file. “I’m seeing here he’s more of a homebody. He’s a Capricorn. He needs a little bit of a push to go out, but I’m thinking with the persona you’re projecting, he might alter his energy to be more outgoing. I think you could get even closer if you went out off camera. You said you had a good time with him, right? Well, I think before we start trying to get anywhere, love-wise, with him, you need to get him to spill his guts to you about that past relationship he was in. He’s been bottling that all up, it’s personal to him. If you get him to tell you about it, you become more valuable to him. Someone he’ll trust, and probably be more flexible when it comes to you setting him up with other people.”  
  
Dan listens to Brian carefully, “Mm-kay. So invite him out for drinks?”  
  
Brian makes a disapproving noise, “Nope. Dude doesn’t drink. You’re gonna have to be more creative than that.”  
  
Dan runs a hand through the floppy mop of curls he calls hair, “Fine. I’ll have a think about it. It’s still early in the day. Since we’re not recording today I’ll do some googling about nearby places and shoot him a text. See if he wants to hang.” 

“Gotcha. Gotta bounce. Talk later.”  
  
Dan nods as if Brian could see him, disconnecting the call. 

“Arin, Arin, Arin. What do you like to do?” Dan mumbles to himself, collapsing back onto the couch, pulling the laptop his apartment came outfitted with towards him.

He’d spent quite an amount of time with Arin at this point. Yet Dan still had a pretty loose idea of what kind of person he was. Arin only showed one side of himself while filming. Dan had to figure this guy out before he could even get a start on his task. 

Games. The idea kept floating through Dan’s mind and suddenly a thought hit him.  
  
“Ar…cade?” He tilts his head, googling if there were any classic arcades nearby. In this modern-day and age, Dan wasn’t sure they existed anymore, with all the home gaming systems and stuff. Luckily, it seemed there were still a couple of novelty ones around according to the internet. 

Landing on one that was near enough to both his and Arin’s place, Dan considers this a good starting point. It seemed to be attached to a diner as well, so if Arin wanted to eat, he could. 

Dan pulls his phone from beside him, quickly realising upon picking it up, this was the special phone, and he had to hide it before Ross showed up randomly. 

He grabs his other phone from the coffee table, shooting Arin a text as he heads to the bathroom to put back the ‘Brian only’ phone.  
  
 _Hey. Since I’m new 2 the area, wz wondering if u wntd 2 go out 2nite? Interested in this classic arcade nearby. U in?_

Dan leans against the sink, reading the text over fifteen or so times before catching himself out.  
  
Why was he so nervous to send the text? He spoke to Arin at work all the time. Dan considers it could be because he might be crossing a line. Like. Are they friends, or colleagues? Is Arin willing to be friendly with him all the time? Would going out with Dan be like a chore for Arin? Dan had no clue but he summed up in the end that he had to light a fire under his ass somehow. So he hit the send button.  
  
Turning to look at himself in the mirror, “You’re a mess, Avidan.”  
  
———

Arin hates to admit it, but he had been stalking Dan. There was something weird Arin had noticed about Dan. He seemed to be clueless about some things. Other times he just seemed so, for lack of a better word, pretty…and confident. Arin couldn’t figure out how this guy didn’t have a following already.

His public _Instagram, Facebook_ profile and _Twitter_ had all been created the evening Dan was hired. This struck Arin as weird. There seemed to be no trace of him anywhere else on the internet. No family information. No family in his Facebook friends. He was totally unattached to anything, Arin had no basis to work from except for his connection with Ross and what he knew of Dan from the time he had spent with him.  
  
Dan had only posted a couple of pictures on his _Instagram_ and seemed to still be working out the point of _Twitter._ It was almost like he’d never been in contact with these websites before. The guy appeared in his mid-thirties and Arin couldn’t piece together how he wouldn’t know anything about these websites until now. It wasn’t like he was necessarily old.  
  
It was then his text tone shook him free of his thoughts. 

Speak of the devil.  
  
Arin read over the text a couple of times. Dan wants to hang out…with him? Arin couldn’t say he wasn’t curious, or that he didn’t want to. All the time he’d spent with Dan at the office had been loads of fun, but outside of work, wouldn’t Dan rather hang out with someone he knew better? Like Ross? Perhaps Dan was just trying to expand his circle of friends? 

Arin shrugs to himself. It’s not really like he had anything else to do today. He could keep suspecting Dan and looking him up online, or he could meet up with the real thing. One seemed better than the other.  
  
Arin texts back.  
  
 _Um, sure. Txt me the address and I’ll meet you there, say…5?_

It doesn’t take long for Arin to get a text back including the address and a smiley. 

There was a rush of something inside of Arin. He’s a little excited to see how things would gel with Dan outside of work. Arin wouldn’t want to confront his thoughts about Dan head-on at this point, but he had been getting more and more excited each day this past fortnight.  
  
Dan seemed born to do _Game Grumps._ Arin had found a real gem and liked him enough that he always felt a little bummed to have to end a session. He wondered more often then he’d like to think he did what Dan thought about him. How Dan was finding the sessions. Then he’d find himself getting anxious, making a dumb little quip, and immediately Dan’s laughter and additions to his jokes and bits would soothe him. 

A comedy duo birthed from Heaven, seemingly. 

Arin stands up to go get ready and clean himself up a bit. He has about an hour before he has to meet Dan, so it was just enough time to shower and change. Maybe today he’d be able to find out more about his cohost.

———  
  
“Oh, BOOM!” Arin calls out, sinking a basketball in the net at one of the dumb hoop games at the arcade, “Suck my huge, long, gorgeous, ticket-winning DICK, Avidaniel!” 

Dan had been basically unable to drop his smile since Arin arrived. Dan wasn’t very good at these games, but he could tell Arin was. Something about the way he got excited when he started collecting tickets was very entertaining to Dan. 

“Arin.” He repeats in a disappointed tone, but his smile gives him away. “I feel like it’s not even worth me trying anymore."  
  
“Aw. c’mon.” He locks eyes with Dan, a mischievous smirk playing at the corner of his lips, “You pussy? You a pussy, huh?”  
  
Dan giggles, “No….but I’m pretty good at _scoring_ pussy.” 

Arin matches his laughter, siding with him as they roam around the game floor. All the thoughts Arin had about Dan before he was invited out had disappeared completely. It seemed they were just as good friends outside recording as they were in the Grumps room.  
  
Dan checks the time on his phone, “Do you wanna thrash me in air-hockey first or are you hungry?”  
  
Arin shrugs, “I could eat. Then I’ll thrash you at air-hockey. Then I’m gonna buy so much shit from the prize counter and you won’t get ANY of it.” 

Arin’s child-like excitement kept Dan at peace. He still felt a deep hatred for most humans, but he kept thinking of Arin less and less like a human, and more as just…Arin. Arin, on the other hand, had been Dan’s fan since the day he was hired. it had only become more clear lately.  
  
They chat and laugh on the way to the diner, and as soon as they were sat at a table Dan notices their waitress eyeing Arin from across the restaurant. He leans forward, lowering his voice.

“10 o’clock. Our waitress is totally checking you out.” 

Arin seems a little surprised, his cheeks taking on some kind of pink hue once he managed to take a sly look. “I don’t know about that.”  
  
“You are such a liar, Arin. You _know_ she’s looking at you.”  
  
Arin puffs his cheeks out, “Mm…even so. I’m not really interested.” 

“Is she not your type?”  
  
Dan looks at her from where he’s sitting. She seems perfectly attractive. Dan would probably grant her wish if he were still in Heaven. Blonde hair, blue eyes. Not a bad figure. 

“Well, she isn’t my type, but that’s not why I’m not interested.” Arin mutters, “It just feels too soon.” 

“Too soon…after your divorce?” 

Arin had mentioned his divorce in passing a few times since Dan had been here, but never at length. Dan knew it was probably too much of a sensitive topic for Arin to talk about, but Brian was right. If Arin never opened up to Dan, he’d never be trustworthy enough to him. 

Dan wonders how he was going to get it out of him. 

Arin nods in agreement, “Yeah…I just…You know what? It doesn’t matter.” He smiles sadly, “You wouldn’t understand.”  
  
Dan wonders if maybe Arin would open up to him in that respect if he shares something similar first. He blanks for a while, never having had a serious relationship since…well, he didn’t even like to say his name anymore. It still stung, what he had before, but there were similarities between that and what Arin was probably feeling now. 

After they place their orders Dan hardens his resolve This was as good a time as any, quite honestly. Maybe he’d feel a little better sharing it too. 

“I think I understand kind of.” Dan sighs, running his tongue across his teeth in preparation, “Sort of. We were never married but sometimes it felt like we were.”  
  
Arin pauses, suddenly looking slightly more interested. “With who?”  
  
“My first love.” Dan looks at Arin, “Erin. Similar name to yours right?” He doesn’t give Arin the chance to respond, “So…We were like, best friends through high school, but it always felt like more than that. I really tried in high school to get the best marks to get into the same University as him. I wanted to do everything I could to just follow him wherever he went. It was like…I was a dog. To make a long story short, I wanted more than friendship with him. I wanted to be even closer to him. It didn’t make any sense, so I spent a while figuring out my feelings and it became clear I’d fallen for him.”  
  
Arin listened to Dan’s story. Arin was a bit surprised Dan was even sharing this with him, but he felt flattered that Dan trusted him enough with it. It made it clear to Arin that Dan really was trying to prove to him that he might know where he was coming from and was making an attempt to get closer to him. 

“Then…” Dan continued. “I told him how I felt about him and he accepted my feelings, and we, just, you know…kinda started dating. Our relationship was like fire when it began. Like…you know when you just can’t stop thinking about someone…you can’t wait to see them again. It was very that. We kissed, we screwed, we spent time together, all that good shit.” He pauses, thinking through his next words, “But then…time moves, and people grow for the better or for the worse.”

Arin searches Dan’s face. He could see Dan was reflecting and saw the pain in his eyes. “Wh…” He could barely bring himself to say the next sentence, “What happened?”  
  
“He cheated on me.” Dan says very plainly, “Not just once, but lots of times. Not just physically but emotionally. He broke up with me when I figured him out. I made him tell me everything and he did. There was no sugar coating, it’s like he didn’t even care how I felt about it anymore. The way he spoke to me tore my heart right out of my chest. I felt like I was dying. Then he just left, and I stood there in my dorm room by myself. I can still hear the empty silence. God.” Dan kisses his teeth, “So from there…I kinda…just…” He shrugs, “I don’t know? I shut down from there. Started drinking. Started fucking girls non-stop. Swore to myself I’d never date or fall for anyone else, especially not a guy. I started to hate anyone who _did_ date a guy. I hated anyone who even thought I might swing that way. You feel fulfilled for a hot minute until you realise that it’s really over. It gets worse before it gets better. I’m not sure if I ever fully healed. I haven’t stopped drinking or scoring pussy since, but none of it hits the same.” 

Dan drew a broken heart on the table with the condensation off the side of his drink. 

Arin didn’t really know what to do or say. Dan just shared probably one of the most painful stories with him, and he feels closer than ever to the dark-haired male across the table. He really wants to tell him it does get better, but who was he to speak? He’d just spent months obsessing over Suzy leaving. Suzy never cheated on him, but they did grow apart. Dan had been there before, but in a worse capacity, it seemed. 

“Dan…” Arin mumbles, “Thank you for sharing.” He wasn’t even being sarcastic, something about Dan opening up about something so painful really played at Arin’s heartstrings.  
  
“Mm—“ Dan laughs uneasily, “Yeah. It’s just… I didn’t think I’d be diving right back into that today, but I just wanted you to know I can kinda picture how you felt, even if that’s just my perception. I don’t mean to turn the attention onto myself.”  
  
Arin thought back to his relationship with Suzy and realises he’d never really spoken about it to anyone. Maybe that’s what he’d needed all this time. Someone to just talk to. “Well, um…if we’re sharing. Do you wanna hear my own sob story? I’m not great at telling stories but…maybe…you’ll understand?”

Dan nods, “Sure. Whatever you feel like, man.” 

Dan had struck the jackpot, but the feeling was lost on him. An automatic feeling of numbness overcame him whenever he spoke about his past. Maybe, just maybe after he’d finished on earth and Arin was happy, Dan would have to use his newfound skills on himself. 


	6. The Crush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Dan returns home, he's got Arin's story about the break up swimming about in his head and it's making him feel unexpected...'emotions', his feelings on humankind starting to crack all because of this Big Cat. While Dan sleeps on it, Arin tries to work out his suddenly new affections towards the dark-haired male, worried to go to sleep should he have a dream about it that confirms his fears. Ross comes over to scope Arin out and distracts him, realising Arin's developing a crush. Meanwhile, Arin realises the lovelies are finally accepting Dan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always have to swap tabs I have open in the background when I'm writing these stories, it's almost like they're watching me sometimes. 
> 
> Sorry if the spacing is weird. Word copies my spacing all weirdly directly for AO3.  
> Finally, I'm able to write the teeny-tiniest bit of fluff. It's meant to be a slow burn but I'm just so impatient to get these dorks together, I had to start somewhere! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy, I appreciate all the comments and kudos as always, it always brightens my day! (A little like Dan brightens Arin's!)

\--------------

Dan tosses and turns in bed as the night swells around him. Flopping over onto his back, he lifts his hands to rest under his head. “Fuck.” He mutters to himself softly. 

  
The night he had with Arin had ended on somewhat of a high note. They had finished dinner and as a final play, Arin mopped the floor with Dan with a few games of air hockey. It was a great way to forget all that they had talked about at dinner, but now with no one but himself, Arin’s heartbreaking story swam about in his head.  
  
***

_“It was a Tuesday, I can remember it clearly. Like some kinda…flashbulb memory. I got home from a session and I felt as soon as I entered the house that something was wrong. Something had been slightly off all day like it had all been culminating up to something big. Not many of my jokes or bits had landed in the Grumps session. I didn’t listen to any music on the way home. Suzy wasn’t there when I woke up in the morning. It was all just very…wrong. You know what they say about waking up on the wrong side of the bed.”  
  
_

_Arin sips some of his cola, twisting a lock of hair around his index finger._

_Dan didn’t know how to respond to that, so he just waits for Arin to continue._

_“Anyways, she was there, at the kitchen island. She gave me the same sweet smile she always did, but her eyes were red like she had been…you know…crying or whatever.”  
  
_

_It was clear it hurt Arin talking about this._

_“I couldn’t bring myself to ask why for some reason, I think I already knew why. Long story short…We talked for a little about nothing specific, and then it was like she decided she just had to come out with it and she was all, ‘Arin…I think this is over.’ And I mean, I knew exactly what she meant when she said it. She didn’t have to clarify, and we both knew that. I couldn’t fight it either. There wasn’t much of a conversation to be had after that. She just kinda…packed up and left…and I was just…alone. It all went so fast that I didn’t have any time to process it. So, a week later, when the shock finally subsided I sorta fell apart. Then…a month passed and the divorce papers came in the mail, signed. I guess she hurt too much to give them to me in person, and I’ve never blamed her for that.”_

_Dan winces. This sucks. This is what he wanted? This is what he brought Arin out for? This was the worst! This isn’t what he wanted!_

_“Arin, I’m sorry, I—“ He trails off. No, he had to let him finish. He’d let it go on for this long._

_Arin gives him a sad smile, laughing a little to cover up his agony, “So I procrastinated for a while longer. I figured this is what people meant when they say ‘If you love them, let them go.’ I never understood it before. I finally signed them when I realised it probably just hurt her more the longer I waited. Then…Jon quit and all of that stuff…It was just like everything at once. I was half expecting the Grumps office to be foreclosed on unexpectedly to really round things up nicely. Man….thinking about me these past few months, I’m surprised I haven’t literally fallen apart. I couldn’t really talk to anyone about it either. They all knew her. It seemed just too painful.”  
  
_

_Arin pauses for a bit. staring deep into his cola like it was a portal to the past._

_“I guess…I guess…” He mumbles, “I guess you’re the first person I’ve spoken to about it at length.”_

_Dan presses his lips into a thin line, tilting his head thoughtfully. “Thank you.”  
  
_

_“_ _Huh?”  
  
_

_“Thank you.”_

***

When Dan thought back on it, it would’ve been better to be more comforting, but he was still grateful to know what it had been that had driven Arin into the ground something fierce. He remembers yearning to reach out. A hug maybe. 

He still feels conflicted though. His distaste towards humans seemed to be wavering already, all because of this big teddy bear of a man. Arin was just so _there_. Dan hadn’t ever known someone quite like him. A huge dork, a gracious dork, a sensitive dork. Dan kind of…adored it? The child-like way Arin had about him. The way he spoke with passion and zeal, even after something so painful. Yet, he had the mature ability to run a whole business at the same time. The dude just had so many sides to him, some, Dan was sure, he had yet to witness. 

Dan keeps his eyes fixed on the ceiling, his focus eventually drifting, as he gently dozes off. 

———  
  
Arin erratically stirs his 5th cup of coffee within 3 hours.

“Idiot. Idiot. Dumb.” He whines to himself, looking at the clock. 

In all honesty, he had been keeping himself up for the last few hours since he had gotten home. He didn’t want to go to sleep in fear of having a dream involving a certain male. 

Upon getting home Arin had caught himself in a mirror as he passed it, looking back he didn’t recognise the huge smile that was plastered over his cheeks. It was uncannily different from the permanent frown he’d gotten so used to, it almost freaked him out. It was only then that he realised that the whole evening he had been absolutely enamoured with Dan. This guy. This _guy._ He had such a way about him. It was infectious. Their energy vibrated off one another and they just lifted each other up. It made Arin feel so good.

As his coffee begins to cool, Arin wonders if the reason he had felt so good was that it had been a while since he had felt any good at all. Was a small amount of good masquerading as a big amount of good? Sitting here, going around in circles in his head, wasn’t doing him any favours. 

_Dan. Who are you Dan Avidan?_

_Why can’t I find anything about you anywhere?_

Arin still felt somewhat elated, however, that Dan had chosen to share something as personal as his heartbreak story with him out of the blue. It was horrible, to feel so good at hearing someone else’s terrible experiences. Though, to Arin, it just felt like it brought them closer together. 

Arin decides he had to distract himself, switching on an older episode of _Sailor Moon._ He had such an affinity for shows like this, unusual for a man of his age or build, but he liked it, it was unique to him. 

His phone trills next to him, receiving a text from…Ross?  
  


_U up?_

Arin checks the time, it was 11:30 pm. Why did Ross want to hang out with him all of a sudden? What was it about him today? Why did everyone want to hang out?

Arin responds.

_Yeah?_

_Stay up. I’m coming over with pizza._

In the time Arin scrambles to put on clothes that weren’t just an oversized hole-ridden t-shirt and boxers his doorbell rings. He really wishes Ross had given him more notice. Pulling open the door to a pile of pizza boxes with legs, Arin moves back so Ross can get inside, gently placing the precariously stacked pile of boxes on a nearby table. 

“Arin!” Ross grins widely. 

“Ross.” Arin leans against his counter with crossed arms, an amused smile dancing across his lips.  
  


Ross eyes the larger man closely, leaning in and arching an eyebrow, “Have you had a good day or something?”  
  


Arin cocks his head, “Why do you ask?”  
  


“You got this happy glow. It’s ugly.” Ross makes a face, pulling pizza off the pile and setting it open on the table, taking a piece for himself, “Makes me ill just lookin’ at you.”  
  


“Well excuse me. You were the one who invited himself over.”  
  


“I brought you pizza! It’s a payment!” Ross pouts with full cheeks, “So what did you get up to?” 

Arin helps himself to a slice, “Went out with Dan.”  
  


Ross’ interest seems piqued, “Oh? And?”  
  


“We went to an arcade.” Arin hums happily, “Then we ate at a diner, shared some stories, got to know each other better. Then I absolutely annihilated him at air-hockey. It’s like the guy has never seen a fuckin’ arcade machine in his life. He looked like one of those floaty balloon dudes outside car dealerships when we played dance-dance revolution. It was fucking funny man, you should’ve been there!”  
  


Ross watches Arin gush over Dan a bit more, looking very curious.

“I—…Wow, Arin. You, um, seem to really like the guy?”  
  


Arin nods but pauses, “Well…I mean, yeah. But what’s with that tone?”  
  


“What tone?”  
  


“That tone!” Arin points an accusatory finger at Ross, “You’re totally using a toney-tone on me. You’re all _‘Wow, Arin.’_ and I’m all _‘What?’_ and you’re all…like…just…what are you implying?”  
  


Ross snickers, shrugging, “Sounds kinda gay.”  
  


“Your Mom is gay.” Arin scoffs.  
  


“Real mature, Arin.” Ross smiles anyway, “Why didn’t you offer to suck his dick if you liked him that much?”

“Now you’re making assumptions.” Arin mumbles quietly, “No one said I had a crush on him.”  
  


Ross laughs a little harder, “You’re _right_! No one did say you had a crush, that was all you. Aren’t you supposed to be all heartbroken over Suzy?” 

Arin sways, “Thanks for the reminder. Yes, and I still am. I don’t have a crush on Dan. I can appreciate that he’s handsome, but that doesn’t mean anything.”  
  


“I dunno about that, man.” Ross pats Arin on the back, “But I can tell you he’s not as handsome as me.”  
  


Arin chews to dodge responding to that. When he finally swallows he redirects the conversation. “Why’d you wanna come over anyway?”  
  


Ross sets his pizza down, pulling out his phone, “Check out the comments on the latest Grumps recording.”

**_Cannonball54677:_ ** _Anyone else starting to really like Dan?_

**_xXKittuSenXx11:_ ** _I’m no Dan fan but he’s keeping up with Arin well in these things._

**_SeancéKnowles:_ ** _Guys, if Arin chose Dan then we should at least give the guy a chance. In my opinion, he’s actually really funny and seems like a great dude. Jon’s a big act to follow and he’s doing well so far._

**_11Kingbigdong11:_ ** _Loving the new host._

And hundreds more along the same vein. 

“Oh my God, they’re starting to like him?” Arin scrolls through the comments after snatching the phone from Ross, “That’s such a relief. You never know. Sometimes fans just never take to someone new. We need to let Dan know!”

Arin basically tosses the phone back over to Ross and rushes over to get his own. Ross suddenly appears in front of him almost like it was out of thin air.  
  


“Whoa…How’d you get there?”  
  


Ross avoids that question, “Hold your horses, big guy. What’s the rush? It’s late…he’s already asleep…probably.” Ross adds the ‘probably’ to the end like an afterthought, as if he already knew Dan was sleeping. 

Arin blinks, “Even so, he can wake up to the good news.”  
  


“Again, what’s the rush?” Ross inquires, “You’re certainly acting like someone who has a crush.”

Arin rounds Ross, picking up his phone, glaring at him, “Must you question everything I do?” Arin grumbles, “I don’t have a crush. How many times do I have to repeat it until your brain registers?”

Ross smiles to himself, considering the interesting predicament Dan had gotten himself into. Not only would Dan now have to navigate organising dates for Arin, but he’d also have to navigate Arin himself too. For an angel with a brain the size of a dime-piece, this just got even tougher, and for Ross, this was absolutely _delectable._ He had not factored this into his list of outcomes and the possible new route that just revealed itself to him made him weak at the knees. An angel on the way to mortality! What could be better?

“Wipe that smile off your face.” Arin glances up from his phone, “You look like you’re about to bust a fat nut.” 

“Would it upset you that much if I were, though?” Rosh simpers, looking quite pleased with himself.

Arin huffs, “What about you, anyway? Dan’s your friend. You were the one who recommended him. You must be pleased he’s finally being received well.”  


“Dan…? And I? Friends?” Ross looks bemused for a little, “Sure…'friends’. Yes. I suppose a friend would be happy for him. I think he’s a good fit for the show at least. I knew the lovelies would take to him after a little. It was just a matter of time, but I know _Game Grumps_ is your baby so I understood your anxiety. I thought it might brighten your day a little to see how well the latest video was doing, but…looking at you…I guess your day didn’t need any more brightening.”

Arin lets a real beam cross his face, “Thank you, Ross. It means the world.”  
  


Ross falters, coughing, “Ew. But you’re welcome or whatever.” 

Arin giggles, “You act as if you’d burst into flames if I hugged you or something.”  
  


“I wouldn’t test it incase I do.” Ross recoils preemptively, “You might crush me.”   
  


“Are you saying I’m fat?” Arin jokes, shooting off a text to Dan. “Well. It’s a good thing, otherwise who else is going to eat all that pizza you brought?” 

———

The next morning Dan is woken by a stream of sunlight hitting his face through the gap in his curtains. Having forgotten to change out of the clothes he wore yesterday, he can still recall all of what happened with supreme clarity. He hated that the memory made him smile.

He rolls onto his side, reaching for his phone charging on the nightstand. Holding it above his face (but not without dropping it on his face a couple of times first) he checks his new messages. Noting an exponential increase in follower notices on his public _Instagram, Twitter_ and _Facebook,_ there’s also a text from Arin. 

_Avidaniel :) The Lovelies are loving you suddenly. Way to go! Knew you were the right fit!_

Dan is mildly surprised, rolling over onto the other side and grasping for his laptop to check the comments.

Once he does he’s filled with the warm fuzzies. The comments were really sweet and accepting of him. Some even complimented him on his ability to continue on the _Game Grumps_ legacy. Humans may be superficial and unoriginal, but they definitely had a way with words. There was something about their inability to accept change that made it that much more special when they finally did accept you. It showed him that he is doing something right.

In Heaven compliments and words like these are expected. Even meaningless. They are accepting of everything, everything except the dark and negative. A lot of the time it drove Dan up the wall. It’s okay to say you don’t like something. It’s _okay_ to have opinions! It’s fine to differ from the crowd. 

It was his difference that got him banished though. His way of granting wishes was not the status quo. He was cast away because he didn’t want to judge humans by words on a page. He didn’t want to sit in front of a computer all day. He shouldn’t be granting wishes to people who ‘deserved’ it based on some report in a file. That’s maybe what he found so grating in the first place. People should get their wishes granted because they _earned_ it. 

Is this punishment _earned?_ Or is this just the punishment he deserves? Does it go both ways? Wishes and punishments? 

What’s so bad about human bias? They’re all so different, right? Or at least they claim not one person is the same. You can’t get along with everyone you meet. Such is the way of life. So where is the fault in preferring one over the other? 

If this punishment was to teach him out of having a bias, well, it was doing a shitty job.

At this point, and as much as he hated to admit it…he was very biased toward Arin. 


	7. Unwelcome Realisations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Upon realising his possible feelings for Arin, Danny gets uncomfortable. With only two months left, Ross urges Dan to get moving on his task and suggests Dan takes Arin speed-dating. He does so but Arin accidentally takes a liking to Dan's alcoholic drink and gets in over his head. Dan starts to get worried about Arin the drunker he becomes and also starts to get impatient with the women who are starting to become interested in Arin, though he can't place why. Eventually, he manages to haul Arin away from the bar and the alcohol but is riddled with guilt over his choice to follow Ross' suggestion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I might as well say that I update this thing weekly by now!  
> Thank you for the kudos and comments, they all brighten my day so much. I can't wait to read them as soon as I get the notification, so feel free to leave them if you're so inclined! <3 This chapter's end may be a bit cliche, but I think it's cute regardless!

**CONTENT WARNING: Recreational Alcohol Usage**

\-----  
  
  
Two weeks had gone by since Arin and Dan had gone out to the arcade together, and Dan was a whole month into his stay on earth. Two months remained, and much to his dismay, Dan was still working on Arin.

Sessions in the grump room were really getting underway now the fans had started to support the new addition to the duo. There was also something distinct in the air between these two that remained untold. 

Dan hadn’t noticed until recently, but over the past fortnight, he’d adopted a new habit. He wasn’t sure when it started, or why, but he knew it must’ve only materialised since they became closer that day at the arcade. Every time he’d crumble into laughter he’d… lean. Not just lean any which way though. Lean against Arin, or if Arin was too far away, at least in the direction of Arin. This was becoming so frequent people were starting to take note in the meeting room too. 

Team meetings in the Grumps office were never ultra-formal. It was more something they did to get the team focused in, so jokes and laughs weren’t unusual. Dan hadn’t noticed this habit until he noticed that Arin didn’t pull away either. It was more of a: ‘Why is Arin letting me lean on him? Why am _I_ leaning on _Arin_?’ sort of deal. Even so, try as he might, as soon as he descended into side-splitting laughter, there he was again, leaning against Arin in full view of everyone. 

He wondered how this became so normal to him. He wasn’t quite sure what he was feeling suddenly. To Ross’ delight, this all came to a head the next morning before work.

Dan swishes mouthwash, looking in the mirror as he thought back over yesterday’s events. 

Arin had insisted that they play something scary. Apparently, it was an irregular occurrence on _Game Grumps_ , making those some of their more popular play-throughs when released. Growing up in Heaven, Dan really, really hated scary things. They were so few and far between up there, even thunder was rare and would come with advance warning, so Dan wasn’t very good at handling any of those situations. He couldn’t help wonder why humans would put themselves through scary experiences. It just seemed counter-productive. Though with the excited look on Arin’s face, Dan reluctantly had agreed after a little careful coercing. 

It started normally enough. A dark room, eerie noises, the occasional fake-out scare, but Dan had never aptly prepared himself for jump-scares. Well…they were _meant_ to make you jump, it’s in the name, but they really rocked the former angel. Soon enough, Dan had morphed from a man into a ball, curled up, leant against Arin, clutching a cushion to his chest.

Arin would giggle, a giggle that Dan was getting so used to, every time Dan got shocked. By the end of the whole session, Dan was left basically peeking out from behind Arin’s shoulder to make sure nothing else scared him. 

Then something happened. The smell of Arin’s shampoo caught in the air and lulled Dan into feeling safe. Arin turned to get a look over his shoulder at Dan and they locked eyes squarely and deeply. Something in Dan’s chest tightened and fluttered. Dan had never properly looked into Arin’s dark eyes and never at such proximity. There was a moment of silence with Dan pressed against the back of the couch, caught behind Arin. Arin laughed softly and the vibration ran through Dan’s body.

Whatever Dan felt in that moment was vaguely familiar. That feeling lingered in his chest until he moved away from Arin, trying to brush off every time Arin teased him from then on. 

What was that feeling though?  
  


When Dan realises, he effectively spits his mouthwash all over the mirror. 

“F-Fuck!” He sputters, fumbling for a towel while he pieces his thoughts together. 

Whilst cleaning off the mirror he notices the very troubled look now stuck on his face. The thought kept creeping into his peripherals with the memory of them on the couch tacked onto the back of it. 

Did he…was he?

Was he developing feelings for Arin? 

_No._

He thought.

_Absolutely not. It’s only been a month, and I’m not gay! Sure, there was that one relationship, but since then it’s only been exclusively women._

Arin had expressed not being particularly set in is sexual preference before during a session, but it hadn’t meant anything to Dan at that point in time. Dan didn’t mean to erase bisexuality, but the idea was just so foreign and scary to him, admitting it made him feel uneasy. It had been so long. It had been so _painful._

“Whoa. It sure is a mess in here.” 

“Yeah, I know—Wait!” He looks up to see Ross in the mirror behind him, jumping back,almost falling back into the demon, “What’s your problem, man?”  
  


Ross was becoming another reason Dan didn’t like scary things. Though admittedly, over the past few weeks, Dan had been spending about as much time with Ross in the evenings as he had been with Arin during the day. After a while, Ross had dropped the whole weird and condescending tone he had developed and they were talking more like bros. 

“I have a lot of problems.” Ross laughs, “I think it’s a demon thing.” He catches Dan and pushes him back onto his feet, “What’s with the _Listerine_ tsunami? I think you’re supposed to spit it into the sink.”  
  


Dan gives him a ‘Duh’ look and moves past him to the bedroom, pulling a shirt on, “I got shocked.”  
  


“By what?”  
  


“My brain. My brain shocked me.”

“Weird.” Ross sides with him, sliding up next to him once Dan collapses back onto his bed, who runs his hands over his face. “What’s on your mind?” 

“I’m a month into my stay and I just had a very concerning thought.”  
  
Ross doesn’t press him on this, willing the calendar on the wall in the living room into his hands, crossing off the 28th of the month, “Mm…there’s still three days left to the month, don’t get ahead of yourself. Even so, a little advice from the friendly demon. Now would be a good time to get Arin meeting people. Take him speed dating tonight, everyone starts somewhere.”

“Do you think that’ll work?”

“I don’t know. I’m not really supposed to be helping you with this shit, but I will tell you, I may or may not have signed you and Arin up for a session tonight.” He presses a business card with the address onto it into Dan’s hand, “And I may or may not be rooting for you. It’s so boring watching you mope around all day, so get a move on and get your wings back so I can go back to Hell.”  
  
Dan considered this opportunity. Brian had been feeding Dan loads of different girls, but each time Dan tried to mention meeting someone to Arin, he’d shoot them down for one reason or another. Interests, occupation, or even star sign, which Dan _knew_ Arin didn’t believe in. 

Ross watches Dan as he looks at the business card, “Now get your ass up and go to work. Can’t believe I’m nice enough to keep driving you there.” 

———

Dan had pestered Arin enough at work to go with him that eventually Arin had given in. It took a huge amount of work that Dan was starting to get frustrated with how stubborn Arin was being, but in bad news for Arin, Dan was a match in stubbornness. 

Now they were here and standing at the bar, waiting for the ’speed-dating’ portion to start. Dan knew Arin didn’t drink, but that didn’t mean Dan hadn’t sped through a couple of pink drinks himself. A girly choice, but something in his gut told him he’d need the buzz tonight to talk to all these human girls. 

Arin looked uncomfortable and Dan slid the drink he had toward him, “Have some.”  
  


“What? No, I don—“  
  


“I know, I know. You just look so awkward and on edge. It tastes like juice anyway. A sip isn’t going to do you any harm. If anything it’ll just cool you out a little.”  
  


Arin hesitates but wanting to get rid of how he was feeling he took a couple of sips of Dan’s drink. “Itdoes taste like juice!”  
  


“I know!” Dan laughs at how cute this grown man was. 

A bell rings and Arin looks at Dan, then to the drink, “Can I take this with me?”  
  


“Sure you can handle it?” 

“Why not? I am a large, fat man.” He jokes jovially, “I don’t think it’ll affect me too badly.”  
  


Dan shrugs, “It’s pretty strong.”  


  
“I’m pretty strong, Avidaniel.” 

“Okay?” Dan directs Arin to sit in one of the chairs at the multitude of tables, all set up in a circle. “You remember the rules? The girls move from table to table. All you have to do is sit here and talk. 5 minutes for each girl, okay?”  
  


Arin nods and Dan turns to go to his own table, but Arin catches his hand before he goes, “Don’t go too far, okay? Stay nearby me. You make me feel more comfortable.”  
  


Dan grins. “No problemo, big cat. I’ll be right next to you.”

Dan slides into the table a few feet away from Arin’s as the girls start taking their places. 

———

A few girls later and Dan was bombing. 

It had started okay. Dan had been absolutely charming the pants off these women, but he had noticed Arin had been ordering more of the same drink Dan had given him, and now there were a few empty glasses on the table in front of him. He could tell Arin was getting loose. Not that it was necessarily bad for Arin’s confidence. In fact, many of the girls across from Arin had been laughing so hard they cried, starting to get more interested in him.

So now Dan was just distracted. 

He didn’t know why he was so worried. This was the point of speed dating. Get women interested in him. Dan hated it though, and he couldn’t figure out why. A few of the most recent women sat with Dan had become increasingly frustrated with him, asking why he kept looking to the next table. Dan explained that Arin was his friend and wasn’t a big drinker. They didn’t seem convinced and kept trying to direct his attention back to them, but it was no use. Dan couldn’t wait for the final bell to go so he could pull Arin away and make sure he was okay. Stop him from drinking so much. 

God, this was his fault! 

As the evening went forward, Dan was getting more and more impatient with the women across from Arin, looking at him like he was some kind of prize to be won. Arin wasn’t just a toy! He was Dan’s friend! Dan was also getting impatient with Arin’s alcohol consumption. A few times when the women switched tables he had tried to gesture to Arin to cut it out with the alcohol but Arin had brushed him off. 

Finally, the final bell went, and the hostess directed the women to write the guy they wanted to see more of on a slip of paper and drop it into the comment box by the bar. 

Dan couldn’t stop himself, immediately grabbing Arin and dragging him over to the far end of the bar. 

“What is wrong with you?” He grumbles, snapping his fingers in front of Arin’s face, “You should never drink that much when you don’t know your tolerance! You’re lucky I’m here.” 

Arin pouts, crossing his arms, “‘M fine.” He hiccups and the pout dissolves into a goofy smile, “D’you think they liked me? The girls.” He slurs. 

Dan frowns, “I don’t care if they liked you. We’re going home."  
  


“You’re going home with me?” Arin blinks.”I didn’t know you liked me that way, Daniel. You like all this man?”

“ _Arin._ Pay attention. You’re going home and I’m taking you there.”  
  


“But what about the girls?” 

“What about them?” Dan’s frown deepens, “We’re leaving.” 

As Dan pulls Arin towards the exit the Hostess stops them.

“Leaving already? We haven’t even announced the nights most liked bachelor yet!”  
  


Dan gets annoyed, “My friend is totally out of his depth and wasted. We need to go home.”  
  


“I hear he’s in with a good chance of winning! He’s a big boy, he can handle himself, can’t he?”  
  


Arin grins at her, “She liiiikes me.”  
  


Dan shakes his head, putting his foot down. “ _We are leaving.”_

With that, she steps aside and Dan pulls Arin outside, flagging a cab and bundling Arin in, getting in next to him. Once he gives the cabbie the address he rubs his temples. Is this what Brian had to put up with Dan in Heaven? He figured it wasn’t exactly the same. Brian never forced him to drink. Brian never forced him to go out. 

Dan curses to himself as Arin dozes off next to him. He felt totally and completely at fault for tonight. Thinking back, he should’ve never taken Ross’ suggestion. Arin is too innocent for this. Arin is too sweet. Arin is too broken. Arin needs soothing. Healing. Arin needs something, someone like that, not women who want to get laid. 

Dan is in his feelings until the taxi pulls up in front of Arin’s place. After throwing some money at the driver and dragging Arin to his front door. Struggling to get the keys out of Arin’s pockets, Dan finally lets himself in, helping a half-conscious Arin upstairs to his bedroom, dropping him on his bed and pulling off his shoes. 

Dan pants, he’d have to remember to thank Brian for everything he did for him is he was ever as much as a pain drunk as Arin was. 

Dan sits on the bed next to Arin to catch his breath. This stupid mortal body was no match for Arin. Dan gasps as the drunken Arin pulls him back to lay next to him on the bed. The sheets smelt like him. It was kind of comforting. 

Dan looks to Arin who he could tell was looking at him in the moonlight streaming into the room through the gap in the curtains, “Arin…”   
  


“Dan…” He says softly, “It’s been…” He coughs gently to try to clear any drunkenness from his voice, “You’re the first person to lay next to me since Suzy. The bed…” Dan can tell it’s a bit difficult to Arin’s mind to piece together words in this state, “The bed’s so empty by myself.” 

Dan goes quiet, not really knowing what to say to that, “Really?” 

That was dumb.

Arin laughs a little, pulling Dan closer to him, “Stay fo’ tonight…M’kay?” 

“I mean. I shouldn’t. You need a proper rest. Are you sure?”

Before Dan could continue his face was on Arin’s chest, “M’ sure. Just stay…for tonight. You’re warm.” His fingers move into Dan’s hair for a moment, and it felt…good. “And fluffy.” He giggles sleepily. 

Dan exhales. He hated how nice it felt to be with Arin, in the dark and quiet. Just in each other’s company. It was the same in the Grumps room, but this was a little different. It felt more intimate. 

At the moment he was just a friend helping out another drunk friend, but this moment was so special to Dan. He couldn’t place why. He also couldn’t place why the whole evening had pissed him off so bad. 

He knew now it wasn’t the alcohol which had upset him. If Arin had gotten drunk, just the two of them together, it probably would’ve been kinda fun. It felt like…those random women had gotten to experience that side of Arin before Dan had. Arin was _his_ task. _His_ project. 

_His crush._

_…_

The sound of empty air filled Dan’s head for a moment. 

“Crush?” He whispers to himself. 

God-fucking-dammit.


	8. The Morning After

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin and Dan wake up in the same bed the morning after the speed-dating escapade. It's becoming increasingly hard for these two to keep harbouring their feelings for one another in secret. For Dan, a dream has just made it clear to him that he actually likes Arin in more ways than one. For Arin, he's been struggling with it for too long for it to just be a crush.  
> Over coffee that Dan makes for Arin that morning, Arin blurts out something he shouldn't after being lulled into a sense of security around Dan. At that moment, Dan is forced to make some kind of decision, but does he make the right one?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note today!  
> Thank you for reading and commenting/leaving kudos as always! I'm super grateful for all those and my regular readers :D  
> Hopefully, the end of this chapter makes up for the snail's pace this story was going at so far. I just wanted to make sure I built the characters and the world up to an acceptable stand-point before tumbling into any romance.  
> Enjoy <3
> 
> \---

Arin rouses to a headache of epic proportions. It was something he’d never felt before in his life. For a while he keeps his eyes closed, just trying to comprehend the level of pain he’s in. Why does he hurt so much? 

Oh, yeah.

He remembers now, or, well, snippets of last night. A cacophony of female faces, but one face sticks out to him more than the rest. Dan’s.

He remembers Dan smiling that same million-dollar smile at the beginning of the night, looking pretty cool and chill as he always does. His demeanour always keeps Arin in a good headspace, but as Arin’s headache begs to make itself more known, Dan’s upset face also presents itself to his memories.

_“Sure you can handle it?"  
  
_

_“It’s pretty strong.”_

_“You should never drink that much if you don’t know your tolerance!”_

_“We are leaving.”_

Arin whines softly, how could he have been so stupid? He should be able to make good decisions, even if he’s a little drunk. Sure, he’d never necessarily been drunk before last night, so he wasn’t to know how it might affect him, but still! That’s why everyone says being drunk is never an excuse to cheat, you’re still conscious! 

Then he feels movement in the bed next to him. Oh-no, he didn’t take anyone home, did he? That’s not like him! Cracking open his eyes, expecting the worst, he observes a mop of black curls. 

Huh?  
  


Arin slowly reaches forward to gently move a lock of hair away from their face and there he was faced by Dan. A sleeping Dan. 

He looked so peaceful, like an angel. Arin realises he finally has a chance to just look at Dan without seeming weird. Time to examine his fine features. He’d wanted to do that for so long. At every opportunity he had, he’d catch himself snatching looks at him in the Grumps room. Swiping glances his way in meetings. Now he could finally just observe those long eyelashes, that sharp jaw spattered with light stubble. Dan was just so…perfect.

Truly, Arin had been struggling since Ross had called him out on having a crush on Dan. It was, however, becoming strikingly obvious to Arin that it was pretty clear he did have feelings that were more than just a dumb crush for his cohost. It was surprising because Arin expected something like this to take much longer. It took him a while with Suzy. She was always gorgeous to him, a picture of beauty, but feelings always come later. 

Arin pauses once he remembers that Dan took him home, and Arin had asked him to stay. It was embarrassing, but Arin was happy Dan agreed. Though they were both still dressed, this definitely seemed closer than normal. 

Dan mumbles some and shifts, rolling over a little more, slinging a leg over Arin. Okay, now this _really_ was closer than normal. Arin looks down at Dan, figuring he should get up and take a shower, let Dan sleep after dealing with him last night, but he doesn’t really want to move. Maybe if he just closes his eyes again time would freeze? They didn’t have work today. Arin hopes that maybe Dan will just spend the day with him of his own free will, but after what he put Dan through last night, he isn’t counting on it. 

While Arin is thinking he hears Dan yawn and looks back over to see his eyes flutter open. Arin smiles down at him, and Dan matches his smile sleepily,

“G’ Morni—…” but at the moment his grogginess clears and he realises the position they are in, Dan shoots up and back, almost falling out of bed, just barely able to save himself. “Y-You…W-we…Fuck—Arin, I’m sorry! Shit!”

Arin laughs quietly, his voice still crackly from just waking up, “Naw…It’s all good. You were sleeping. you can’t control what you’re doing when you’re sleeping. Just like I can’t control myself when I drink, clearly.” 

Dan considers this, exhaling in relief. “You are the most legendary worst drunk I’ve ever met.” A smile graces his lips as he thinks back on it, “I was pretty upset last night, but now I think about it, it was kinda cute.” The word ‘cute’ hangs in the space between them and Dan’s face pales, “I mean…in like…a bro way. Cute in a bro way.”

Arin smirks, narrowing his eyes, “You think I’m _cute,_ Dan? Do you wanna kiss? Is now when we kiss?” 

Dan flushes furiously, turning away, his face obscured by his hair. “It was a mistake. I picked the wrong word. What do you want from me first thing in the morning?” 

“There’s nothing wrong with one bro calling another bro cute. You’re cute right now, man.” Arin soothes him, sliding his legs over the side of the bed and hoisting himself onto his feet, “God, I reek of alcohol…”  
  


There’s a short silence between them before Arin hears a soft whisper from Dan, “‘M so sorry, Arin.” Arin looks over to see Dan looking at him with the biggest, most genuine pleading eyes he’d ever seen. “I should’ve never suggested you sip the drink. I should’ve never let you take the drink. I should’ve never even taken you out. I’m so, so, sorry. It’s like, I’m just, God! I’m just the worst sometimes. It’s all my fault you feel so shitty.” 

Arin sways, “Whoa, hey, it’s all good!” He swats lazily at Dan, “I could’ve refused the sip you offered me, and you didn’t order those other drinks I got for myself. This is my fault. If anything, I should be thanking you. I spoke to more people last night than I’ve spoken to in the last 5 months. Plus, bringing me home, and staying with me? I’d call that being a good friend.”

Dan blinks, taking in what Arin is saying. He’s extraordinarily relieved that Arin thinks so highly of him, but he can't ignore the pang of pain in his chest at the word 'friend' _and_ he still feels like a crappy person. “But…” He sighs loudly, “Never mind. Look, you go and take a shower…Do you want coffee? Do you have a coffee machine? You know what? It’s fine. I will find your kitchen and figure out how to make a coffee if it kills me!” 

Arin bites his lip, trying to stop a wide grin, “I have a machine…It’s pretty easy. Mugs are in the left cupboard. Thanks.” He bows out awkwardly, backing into his en suite and closing the door and pressing his back against it. 

Fuck Dan and his cute, not in a bro way, self.

———

Dan squints at the coffee machine evilly like it was the source of all his problems. He had a lot of things to think about right now. 

Maybe it was sleeping in Arin’s bed, maybe it was being next to Arin, maybe it was just the presence of Arin but last night Dan experienced a very Arin-centric dream. Well, it was an amazing dream while it was happening, and definitely more steamy than he was expecting. Although it seemed like a real nightmare now he was back in the real world and it _wasn’t_ happening. 

He sighed softly, letting it play over in his head. 

***  
  
 _“Oh! Oh yeah! Look at that shit!” Arin exclaims, smashing buttons on his controller, “Look at how hard I’m fucking you right now, Dan! Look at how I’m fucking you right in the butthole!”  
  
_

_“Arin, Jesus Christ, It’s just a video game, not an 80’s porno.” Dan grins, looking across at his cohost._

_“It was an 80’s porno last night though, wasn’t it?” Arin catches Dan’s gaze smugly, “My hands all over you. My tongue.”  
  
_

_Dan goes bright red, recoiling, “Dude…We’re recording…”  
  
_

_“Is that code for ‘Stop recording. I want you’?”_

_Dan shudders. He wants to protest, but he knows Arin only teases harder if he does. Silently, he nods, directing his gaze down into his lap._

_“Oh?” Arin sounds genuinely surprised, but he’s not complaining. He reaches forward, switching off the recording, leaning close to the angel. “Where’s your voice gone?” Dan feels Arin’s finger lift his chin to look at him, “You should know by now I like it when you’re loud.” He closes in, teasingly kissing the edge of Dan’s lips, trailing his jaw and finally his neck._

_Dan struggles to keep quiet, but he wants Arin to keep going, to give him something to really moan about. Despite this, he tilts his head back to let Arin know he likes what’s happening._

_Dan feels a sharp suck and slight pain on his neck, but it drives him crazy, his vision growing hazy._

_Arin leans back, running his finger over that spot, “Wherever I touch you, your body responds.” He grins, looking up at Dan through his eyelashes, “That should be enough for me, but…this bruise? It’s just extra proof that you’re mine and only mine.”  
  
_

_Dan pants softly, enjoying the way Arin dominates him, “Arin. I want you.”  
  
_

_Arin cocks an eyebrow, “I want you too.”  
  
_

_***_

Dan curses quietly, so happy that he’s still wearing his jeans, just about covering up the fact he may or may not be pitching half a tent right now. 

  
“Stupid.” He scowls, placing the second cup under the coffee machine, “Stupid, stupid, stupid!” 

Dan didn’t know where the dream came from, and he didn’t know why he was so submissive in it either. That really wasn’t part of the deal in his head, so far, anyway. Dan hadn’t thought that far ahead in his head yet at all. Arin was so sweet and soft, yet it didn’t seem completely out of character to hear him speak that way. Actually, it was hot. Dan had enjoyed it big time. It was a total buzzkill when he woke up. 

The problem is, now, he had a pretty solid idea of his feelings concerning Arin. If Dan allowed Arin to dominate him, this was outside of a simple ‘one and done’ kind of deal. This is more of a ‘one and please, please give me more’ kind of thing. It made it obvious why he wanted to spend time with Arin, why he wanted to tear those sleazy women’s heads off their shoulders last night for laughing at Arin’s jokes. If Dan was getting possessive, he desired Arin, and not just one side of him either, all of him. The good and the bad. The sweet and the dirty. The happy and the sad. All of Arin, all for Dan. That sounded selfish but ideal. That was clear, but only more problems presented themselves now.

Dan sighs for the umpteenth time this morning; what were the rules of his task if you say, fall for the person you’re supposed to find love for? If they fall in love with you does that still count? Do you still get your wings back? Then what? You go back to Heaven and leave that person behind? Is that a forfeit? Would his task be considered complete? Then what? Then what? Then what?

If this was against the rules, Dan had to consider the possibility that if he took this any further he could be giving up his rights to Heaven completely, inclusive of his family and Brian. Though, if this, him being that ‘big love’, was in accordance with the rules, he may be the first-ever angel to actually not want his wings back at all. Dan knew for a fact that no angel in the history of Heaven had wished to stay mortal forever.

It made his head hurt, and he didn’t know what to do. What if Arin didn’t feel that way about him at all? He hadn’t considered that. He’d been so caught up in his own feelings he’d totally forgotten Arin had a call in this too. 

This is when a face-down picture frame on the kitchen counter stole his attention. Interest piqued, Dan picked it up to see what the picture was. Upon upturning it, he saw a picture of Arin a few years younger than he is now with a beautiful woman next to him. Her hand rested lightly on his bicep, showing off what seemed to be a wedding ring. Was this Suzy? Christ almighty, how was he supposed to compete with her? Dan was attractive but this woman dulled his shine a little. Why was this picture face down? 

He does a quick second scan of the apartment outside the kitchen, noticing that many of the pictures had been taken down by the clean patches of walls, and most of the frames on mantle pieces and flat surfaces had been pushed over or emptied. 

Jumping when he hears the bathroom door open, Dan rushes to put the picture back the way he found it, setting the two coffee cups on the island. Arin shows up a few minutes later, drying his hair off with a towel. Dan smiles tentatively. 

Arin spies the coffee cups, “So you figured out how to work the coffee machine, huh?”  
  


“Yeah, I uh, I forgot to ask you if you take milk or sugar. Or sweetener, or…you know…whatever.”

Arin chuckles, heading over to the fridge, getting the milk. “I do have a little bit of a sweet tooth actually.” He shrugs, getting the sugar out of the cupboard immediately after, “And you? I presume you take it black?”  
  


Dan nods. “Guess you can read me like a book.”  
  


Arin shakes his head, “Actually, no. I was thinking while I was in the shower, I’ve been meaning to ask you…I literally can’t find any trace of you on the internet. Like…nothing. You’re like a ghost.”  
  


“A ghost would be a stretch.” Dan was a little offended, being called a ghost. If Arin had met a ghost he’d know they were hot on demon’s heels for being the most annoying breed of ‘supernatural’ being. “I just was never big on the internet. Stuff you put on there is on there forever.”

“Bold choice to join an _internet_ gaming show then.”

_Fuck._

“Um, well. When I realised I should probably get on the whole internet thing, I thought….go big or go home, y’know?”

Arin nods, stirring the sugar and milk into his cup. A fond smile plays at the corner of his lips, looking at Dan with soft eyes, “The lovelies really like you now.”

Dan beams, “It’s really cool, actually!” He crosses over to stand by Arin’s side, as if an unseen force was pulling him there, “I wanted a community, and now I’ve got one. I didn’t think my internet following would grow as it has. My _Instagram_ had a maximum of five pictures on it, all with over one-thousand likes now. It’s crazy!”  
  


Arin listens to him, just enjoying the idle chatter they were having. It reminded him of the comfortable chats about nothing, in particular, he and Suzy would share in the morning. Those kinds of chats that just flow with such ease, they felt right. 

“I think I really like you too.” Arin blurts out, not thinking. 

Dan freezes, as does Arin. Both staring at each other in shock. 

Arin turns his head away immediately. Fuck. Fucking absolute fuck. He’d fucked it all up in six words. 

“I-I mean…I j-just…” Arin didn’t even have an excuse. He was never good at plucking something out of thin air, “Oh my…God…” He rakes his fingers through his hair, “Oh my God, oh my God…” 

Dan takes a while to process that, “Arin…Arin.”  
  


Arin sucks in air through his teeth, “Fuck.”   
  


“Arin, look at me.” 

Arin goes quiet, and Dan waits in the silence for Arin to turn to him. Finally, he steels himself, stiffly looking at Dan. 

Dan just looks at him for a bit, as all sorts of possibilities run through his head. His task. His family. Brian. His wings, magic, Heaven. Though, right now, none of that mattered. Arin stood in front of him, looking terrified of what Dan might say, and that's all that mattered now. He had to make Arin feel better. 

Time freezes, and it’s just them together in the kitchen. No one else, and Dan makes a decision.

“Fuck it. Now. Now is when we kiss.”

With that, he cups Arin’s face as he closes the distance between their lips. 


	9. The Point of No Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After receiving no reaction from Arin, Dan runs out on him, leaving Arin by himself.   
> With no one else but Ross to run to, Dan hides out at his apartment. Ross, now implicated in Arin and Dan's relationship by accidentally becoming friends with the two of them, agrees to go and talk to Arin to see what he really thinks about Dan, and what happened.   
> Arin gives Ross some very straight answers and Ross realises what trouble Dan has really gotten himself into.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a little difficult for me to write, I keep rewriting it and it keeps feeling like filler to me, so in the end, I just want to get it out of the way by posting it! Either way, it was necessary and I couldn't leave it out, there needed to be a little aftermath.   
> Regardless, enjoy :) <3
> 
> ____________

Arin’s body goes stiff the moment their lips touch, he didn’t know what to do now. 

Here was Dan, his cohost, his friend…kissing him. This is what Arin wanted, right? All morning…scratch that, for the past two weeks! It was surreal. Dan’s lips were soft, they tasted like the few sips of coffee he had, he smelt like the stale cologne from last night. 

However, no matter what Arin thought: how much he wanted this, this closeness, this intimacy…his brain was short-circuiting, and he couldn’t force himself to move against Dan, he couldn’t force his lips to respond. He just stood there, letting it happen. 

Dan pulls back after a little, realising that Arin hadn’t responded at all. Was he wrong? Did he make the wrong move? Had he misconstrued what Arin meant by liking him? Was this all just a miscalculation on his part?

Dan meets Arin’s terrified eyes for a few seconds before taking a shaky step back, “S-sorry…?” His voice gets weird and high-pitched at the end. 

Arin’s mouth falls open like he wants to say something, but nothing comes out. 

Dan apologises again, starting to panic and rushes to the bedroom to get his stuff that he left on the nightstand. 

He can’t think. Nothing but a deep pit in the bottom of his stomach and the need to escape occupies his thoughts. Grabbing his shit he breezes past Arin, who had managed to hobble his way into the living room.

“I gotta bounce. Must leave, hafta go.” He stumbles over his own feet and words, grabbing for the door handle to get out, “Bye—” He stutters nervously, breaking into a sprint once he’s outside, down the street. He didn’t know where he was going, he’d never been to Arin’s place before, but wherever it was, it was away from here. 

Dan slows to a stop once he reaches a public street, tugging at his hair in stress. He’d never felt this way before. He’d never done something so goddamn stupid before, and he’d done a lot of stupid shit. He bumbles along the sidewalk clumsily, eventually knocking his mind out of a hazy mess enough to flag a cab. He couldn’t think of anywhere else to go but to Ross. 

— — —

Another day on this cute little planet called Earth. Ross looks around the apartment he’d got for himself during his stint on Earth and with Dan. His place in Hell was much nicer, but in order to carry out this task he had to chill out here. It was okay! Small and stocked with anything he’d need to entertain himself when he wasn’t dealing with Dan, Arin or other grumps stuff.

He’s shaken from his lazy morning the moment he hears banging on his door. 

“Ross! Let me in, let me in, let me in!”  
  
Ross crosses over to the door, opening it to a very frazzled and upset Dan.

“Um…Da—?”  
  
Dan pushes in past him, closing the door behind him.

“I fucked up! Ross! I fucked up!”  
  


Ross is confused, furrowing his brow, “Hold your horses, hotshot. Calm down and talk to me."  
  


Something about seeing Dan this way threw Ross for a loop. This is the same guy who had rolled his eyes upon being introduced to a demonic taskmaster. What could’ve done this to him was a mystery.

Dan whines loudly, throwing his hands up, “Didn’t you hear me? I FUCKED UP. I don’t know who else to go to. Maybe you could like, give me some insight. I don’t know! I don’t know anyone else here, and even though I absolutely fucking hate you sometimes, you’re the closest thing I have to a friend right now. Okay, okay, okay.” He sorts out his thoughts, “So. Listen. Just let me talk. Don’t fucking interrupt me. Just…let me talk.” 

Ross stands there and lets Dan go on a tangent for about twenty minutes. He listens to him talk about how he felt, watching Arin with other girls. Talk about how worried he was when Arin got drunk. Talk about how he stayed the night. The dream he had. The conclusions about his feelings he’d come to. What Arin had said, and finally, what he did about it. 

“You _kissed_ him?” Ross exclaims, incredulous. “Y-You fucking kissed him?” 

Dan hisses, “Don’t give me your condescending demon shit right now, Ross. I did what I did, and I did a big bad.” 

“I’m not doing my condescending demon shit right now, man! I’m stupefied! The fuck?”

Dan collapses back onto Ross’ couch. “He didn’t respond. It was like kissing a very cute, very moustached plank of wood. So I think I fucked it. If I fuck it, do I get a second chance? Is there someone else I can find love for?”  
  


“Arin is kinda your lot…” Ross mumbles, manifesting Dan’s task file into his hand, flipping through the pages, “But it doesn’t say anything here about what to do if the angel falls for the human, or vice-versa.” He grits his teeth, “Some first task for me, huh?”  
  


“For _you?_ ” Dan shakes his head, “For _me._ FOR ME.”

Ross mumbles to himself, scratching his head. “Hmm…well…I guess you falling for each other doesn’t necessarily constitute breaking the rules. You’re still working on finding him love, that love just…happens to be you. That’s definitely unique, though.” 

Dan just stares at Ross for a moment, “Say more good things like that."  
  


“Well, I mean. Where about are your feelings for him?” 

Dan shrugs, “In my dream…he was the dom.”  
  


Ross makes a face, “That wasn’t my question, Dan."  
  


Dan just continues, “I really like him. I find him really attractive, cute, smart and funny. He’s got that thing…you know? We really connect. He seems to get my humour. He keeps me in an optimistic headspace. I get bummed out when I have to leave him or go home. When he laughs, it’s electric to me, like crackling plasma. I want to make him mine, all of him. I don’t want anyone else to have him. So…I think it’s safe to say I have feelings that vastly outweigh a crush. It's like a crush with roid-rage.” 

Ross sits next to him on the couch, “I know Arin has a crush on you too, but I don’t know if it’s _just_ a crush. It might be more.” He thinks for a moment, “I don’t know, dude! Perhaps it might be a good idea for me to interject here? Figure out where Arin’s head is at this point? Then we can figure out where to go from there.”  
  


“D’ya think he’ll talk to you about it right now?"  
  


“I’ll only know if I try. I’ll stop by his place, impromptu. My thought process is he’ll talk to anyone about it who’s there. Use anyone as a sounding board who’ll listen, to sort out his own thoughts on the matter. And by the way…” Dan looks to Ross, cocking his head like a confused dog. “Have you considered what this might do to your angel status? Like, let’s say Arin does fall completely in love with you through the next few months, and then you get your wings back. Are you just gonna up and leave him?”  
  


“I haven’t thought about it properly. I don’t want to think about it. I think if that happens I’ll only go if he tells me to go. I mean, love is something I’ve only felt once. What I do remember is it feels a damn sight better than just being an angel. I’d give up my place upstairs if he’s the love of my life, and I his. Either way, if this doesn’t go well, I’m stuck down here forever anyway.”

Ross nods, “Affirmative. Mm, okay. I’ll head over to Arin’s now. You stay here and don’t go kissing anyone else while I’m away. You should be grateful, y’know? I’m just supposed to be a stoic overseer, but here I am, clearing up your messes, giving you ideas, ins and outs.”  
  


Dan frowns “I…I know. Thanks…or whatever.”

Ross grabs his stuff, “Uh-huh. I want to hear a lot more of that.” 

— —- —

Arin just about flies to the door when he hears the doorbell, pulling it at open at the speed of light, looking hopeful, only for his face to fall significantly when he see’s who’s standing there.  
  


“Oh. Ross. What’re you doing here? …Have you spoken to Dan? Did Dan send you?”  
  


Ross considers that it’s better if Arin doesn’t know Dan spoke to him. 

“Dan? No. Why? You still struggling with your little school-girl crush?” Ross pulls out a bag of McDonald’s. “I got some breakfast but they gave me too much, so…I thought…hey, give it to Arin, he’ll eat it. Is this a bad time?”  
  


Arin shakes his head. “Uhm. Not necessarily. Just got a lot on my mind.”  
  


“Oh yeah?” Ross starts setting stuff out on the table, “Anything you wanna talk about?”  
  


Arin goes quiet for a bit, “You know Dan?”  
  


“I do Arin, you’re right about that. Coincidentally I was the one who recommended him to you. He was also my friend before he was yours.”

Arin gives him a small glare, “Enough sarcasm. Does he…does he strike you as the kinda guy who’d just…kiss his guy friend for the fuck of it? Or would he do it for a reason?”  
  


“Dan? Um, he seems pretty straight to me. I feel like it’d be a pretty big deal for him to just kiss a guy out of the blue. He must really like that guy.”  
  


“Right? See, that’s what I thought! But I didn’t know…”  
  


“Arin, did something happen?” 

Arin visibly considers keeping his mouth shut. He didn’t want to embarrass Dan in front of his friend. He didn’t want to do that to Dan, but he also feels like he’s said too much already. If he didn’t explain now, if Ross thought about it later, he’d figure it out anyway.

“Dan and I kissed this morning.”

“What?” Ross fakes surprise, “Are you serious?” 

Arin holds his hands up, “Yeah and….Man, I was so happy! I couldn’t believe it happened. In the shower this morning I was just thinking ‘Dude, it’s nice as hell to have him over’! It was also dope to have him next to me in bed. Have him making me coffee. Then I started to put together how much I liked him. How he’d kinda started to fill the hole Suzy had left behind. The hole I thought only Suzy could fill. That’s when I kinda realised it’s not just a crush, rebound or fleeting feelings.” 

Ross arches an eyebrow, “So you kissed him back, right? Did you guys fuck? That’d explain why you were so bummed to see me instead of your bottom buddy.” 

Ross was finding it so easy to lie to Arin. He wondered if it should concern him more.

A flash of hurt sparks behind Arin’s eyes, “Not quite. I didn’t at all, actually. It was like…my brain shut down. It didn’t expect it so it didn’t know what to do.” 

“And then?” Ross sips a coffee he got from McDonald's, knowing exactly what came next. 

“I think I freaked him out. I think he like, didn’t think I liked it…or he realised he didn’t like it, or…I don’t know, man! Then he grabbed his shit and ran. Literally ran, down the street. He ran _away_ from me. Do you know what that’s like? To be run away from?”

Ross _does_ know what that’s like. The one-thousand-mile torture track was a common punishment method in the 4th circle of Hell. Sick mother-fuckers, down there. 

“No. Can’t say it’s ever happened to me.” Ross leans against the table, “Well…what do you wanna do about it now?” Arin looks clueless, and Ross rolls his eyes, “Have you considered how Dan’s feeling? If I swallowed the gay pill for my new best friend, then worked up enough courage to kiss him, despite the probability of losing my job over it…then he didn’t respond, I’d probably run too.”   
  


“I’ve tried calling and texting!” Arin panics, “He won’t pick up! Ross, what if I never see him again? What if he keeps running forever…and then, and then I never get to apologise, or kiss him back or…Ahh!” He groans, “Why do I have the worst luck with relationships lately?” 

Ross stretches, “Stop catastrophizing. Let’s say I can get in touch with him. What do you want me to say?” 

“If you can, just tell him to come see me. Talk to me. Something.” Arin gnaws at the side of his thumb, “Just…not to cut me out because I was so stupid to not do or say anything.”  


“Do you want to be with him, Arin?” 

This sort of catches Arin by surprise, “What?”  
  


“Do you want to be with him? Like, date him. Be a couple. Go public to the lovelies? It’s a big deal.”  
  


Ross wasn’t stupid. He knew that if Arin came to Dan, Dan would accept his apology no questions asked. Ross knew from Dan’s personnel file that the guy never did the big picture, or the long-term. He was impulsive and always did what was best for now. If Arin wanted him, Ross wanted to make sure it was for real. If Dan wanted Arin, that probably meant bye-bye Heaven for him. Ross wasn’t completely sure why he cared so much either. Dan was an angel and Ross loved to watch angels suffer, but the more time he spent with Dan, the more he liked him. 

“D-Date him?” Arin attempts, trailing off, “I…” He thinks back on Dan. The way he looked while he was asleep. The face he made when he apologised to Arin this morning. The coffee, the easy chit-chat. When Arin thought about it, even though it was only a few hours ago now, he missed it and it made him ache. “Yeah.” He affirms, “I want to be with him. Of course I do.”  
  


“Do you love him?”  
  


Arin shakes his head, “No. Not yet anyway.” He had to be honest with himself, “Love is big. Elusive. Beautiful and never-ending. I’ll never admit something like that so easily. It’ll never come that easily either. But…I think…I’ll never see it again if I don’t try. And I don’t want to try it with anyone else but Dan, because right now, Dan is it to me…and I don’t see that changing for a while.” 

Ross huffs uneasily, “Well…I’ll track him down if I can. I just want to let you know. This might be big for you, Arin. However, you don’t know everything about Dan. This is probably an even bigger deal to him. This could destroy him potentially.”  


  
Arin looks confused for a moment, “Why do you say that?”  


  
Ross shrugs, “You’d be great together. I think Dan probably sees that too, which is why he kissed you, and also when you didn’t respond he disappeared. Though…you don’t know every…part of him. If you ever figure that bit of him out, don’t cut him off because he never told you about it. My guess is he wouldn’t because he can’t.”

Arin wavers for a moment before nodding strongly, “I can’t promise anything, but I’ll try my hardest with Dan. Not just for me, but for him too, if he likes me too.” 


	10. Lost and Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Ross returns Dan is gone, leaving behind only a half-empty bottle of vodka and a pack of cigarettes as a sign he was ever there, to begin with. 
> 
> We cut to Dan, drunkenly getting back to his own apartment in an attempt to run from his problems, regretting everything he's done so far and how he's screwed everything and everyone up. He calls Brian for help and guidance, hoping his angel friend might be able to shine a little light in these dark times. After talking with him Dan breaks-down, passing out for a little reprieve, only to be woken up by a loud banging.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do stick to a schedule of sorts, so this does seem to be a sort of weekly thing I do between university preparations, KI hope the weekly updates aren't annoying.  
> I've written this specific chapter over and over again. I don't know why it was so difficult, but this is the best version of chapter 10! I hope anyone who reads this likes it.  
> Thank you for reading, please enjoy! <3 Comments and kudos are always appreciated :D I love this community.
> 
> _________________

** CW: Alchohol Usage **

\----------

When Ross returns later that day, Dan had disappeared. All that seems to be left was a newly purchased pack of cigarettes and a half-empty bottle of vodka that had once been on Ross’ shelf. 

Before Ross even had the chance to tell the former angel about what Arin had admitted to him, Dan had only gone and done another runner. Ross exhales disappointedly, he’d gone to all this effort. He’d listened to Arin drone on and on about Dan and what had happened for hours at this point and all for nothing. 

Presumably, Dan was gonna be pretty drunk by this point. The poor guy probably hadn’t realised alcohol affects him more as a human than it did an angel, and it takes a significantly less amount to get him absolutely black-out. 

Ross isn’t pleased, but also doesn’t want to go to Dan now. If he’s drunk, whatever Ross says isn’t going to make any difference. Dan had clearly fallen back into a familiar pattern. 

“Oh, Dan. You’re just the worst.”  
  
———  
  
Dan had managed to get himself into a taxi at some point. He couldn’t quite remember how anymore. He stared vacantly out of the window, watching the world go by. Everything seemed so simple outside. Sunny and bright, instead of under a personal storm cloud. Everyone going about their daily lives. 

Dan was different though. A caged bird with clipped wings. No history, no growth, no story. Leigh Daniel Avidan had appeared on Earth from seemingly nowhere and had already managed to tangle himself into a web, and the more he struggled with himself, the more trapped he felt. 

Earlier, while Ross was gone dealing with his problem, Dan had come across some of Arin’s older photos on the internet. He looked younger and had this huge goofy smile on his face, next to the same woman Dan had seen in the picture on Arin’s kitchen counter. Suzy. She was a stunner. 

It was like every picture Dan saw go by, her wedding ring blinded him more, and more, and the sicker he felt. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he’d done something that was so immeasurably terrible and the taste of regret slicked his entire tongue. 

It was only a kiss. 

A kiss should mean nothing. It normally would, but the face Arin had when Dan pulled away was burned into his mind’s eye. It was like the whole of everything had changed in an instant. That three seconds of close intimacy put everything that had been in jeopardy. His job, his relationships, his life. 

Dan kept going over what might happen now in his head. The alcohol was magnifying every step into amplified misery for all parties concerned. 

Worst case scenario: Arin hates him, never wants to see him again. Casts him into obscurity and never finds love again, losing trust. This left Dan bound to earth, only left to watch birds fly as he once had, stricken with everlasting guilt.

Best case scenario: Arin somewhat forgives him, and they keep trying to make _Game Grumps_ work. Pretend nothing had ever happened between them. Pretend they were nothing more than work colleagues with miles between them on the couch. Build a work of fiction.

Both made Dan want to throw up, but that might just be the alcohol.

“Hey…Mister.”  
  


Dan looks over to a faceless cabbie, gesturing that he was in front of his apartment block. 

Dan considers how stupid he must look. Hideously drunk in the middle of the afternoon, staring up at his own apartment block like a clueless infant. He shoves his hand into his pocket, throwing a random assortment of notes at the driver, “Nn, hope that suffices…” He slurs his words unsteadily.

The angel clambers out of the cab on feet that feel about as stable as…that…that—uh. He couldn’t recall the word. All that came to his head was the weeble-wobble thing in kids playgrounds. Dan manages to unlock the door, but not before having to sink onto his knees by the door to get a closer look at the keyhole, plus a significant amount of begging and cursing to try to convince the key to work. 

The door swings open to reveal Dan’s stage. His little space full of props that had been put there by someone that was not him, but he still had to pretend they were. That they meant something to him. That those were his memories. Trinkets of all his chronicled time since being born, supposedly a human. 

Dan crawls inside, closing and locking the door behind him. He sits cross-legged on the hard-wood for an indeterminate amount of time as his surroundings swim around him. He pathetically drags himself into the bathroom, laying by the toilet, trying to keep the contents of his stomach down. 

That’s when he spies something. Lazily tucked behind the base of the toilet in a ziplock bag. The phone Brian had gifted him. Dan grabs for it, pulling it towards him. After struggling with the zip-top for a bit he finally frees it from its plastic constraints, calling Brian, holding it up to his ear.

It rings a few times before the familiar voice answers, “Dan?”  
  


“Brian!” Dan half-wails, he felt relief fill the rest of him to the point of bursting, “Brian…I need help. I’m so fucked….”  
  


There’s a short silence, “You’re drunk.”  
  


“Briiii…” The pout in Dan’s voice is clear, “It doesn’t matter. Didn’t you listen? I’m fucked up.” 

“That’s clear.”  
  


“No…I mean I _fucked up._ Big, big, big time.” 

Dan leans against the toilet bowl as if it were a cushion, explaining what had transpired over the last day and a half, hoping Brian might have a solution. 

“I’m scared, Bri. I’m really scared.”  
  


“You sound like you really care about him. You really like this guy, huh? Bet Ross didn’t expect that.”  
  


“I didn’t expect it either!” Dan coughs, “I’m exhausted. This body is so heavy. I just want to go to sleep forever. Problems don’t exist at sleepy-time junction.” 

Brian laughs gruffly, “ _All abooooard cries the engineer…”  
  
_

_“Sleepy-time junction is so near.”_ Dan completes the line, “What do I do?”  
  


Brian thinks for a bit. Dan can tell he’s at work, he can hear people typing around him, and the shuffling of paper. Brian was sacrificing so much to help drunken Dan and sober Dan. If he were found out, he would end up in the same situation as him, yet he persevered. Dan felt vastly inferior. Brian would probably already have completed this task. “Have you tried talking it out?”  
  


“What?” Dan says that like it’s a stupid question, “Words only complicate things. You know I’m no good at words.”  


“That’s a lie. You’re Danny Sexbang.” He lowers his voice, “Who was it who pulled words together in record time to make our stupid songs when we were teenagers?”

“That’s different, Bri. Those are just that. Stupid songs. The lame babbling of two dick-driven teenagers.”  
  


“Maybe so, but you do have a way with words. If you don’t talk to Arin you’re never going to get past this, and this is your only chance to get back up here. The office is so boring without you. I miss you really bad, man.”  
  


This makes Dan’s eyes sting with tears. He viscerally hates to admit it, but he was getting so unbelievably homesick. He never thought he’d miss the predictable nature of Heaven, but Earth was getting _too_ unpredictable _._ There were always problems. Nothing was ever easy. Nothing but Arin.

“I miss you too.” He pauses, “I’m…I will talk to him. I just can’t do it today. I’m too drunk…I’m too frazzled. Arin’s probably too panicked, I can imagine the mess I’d cause if I went to him right away. The dust needs to settle. You shoulda seen his face. It was like I’d turned into a three-headed monster. He was all ‘Holy shit’. You know? It was all over his face.” 

“Yes, I know what you mean.” Brian laughs again, “Alright, I gotta go before anyone catches on. Be good Dan, no more drink.”  
  


Dan nods like Brian could see him, “Uh-huh. See ya, man. Stay frosty.” 

“Ice-cold.” The phone line goes dead and Dan is left sitting by the toilet, alone in his not-his apartment. 

Dan felt something roll down his cheek and he reached up to wipe it away, realising his fingers were wet. He stares at his wet fingers for a while before totally succumbing to tears, pulling his knees up to his chest. 

This was the first time since Dan had landed here on Earth that he’d cried. It was the first time in years, actually. He couldn’t remember the last time it had happened. Nothing had affected him so bad since…well…since Erin. It was almost like he’d been numb since then, and now he was finally feeling a real connection, all the unfelt feelings dog-piled him all of a sudden. As much as it hurt, and as much as he was certain it was one of the effects of the alcohol he’d drank, it felt so good to just let go. 

He’d spent so long pretending to be care-free, easy-going Dan Avidan. Spent so long…lying. He’d just lied and lied and lied and lied. The only real thing he’d felt this whole time was his feelings for Arin. The happiness, enthusiasm, jealousy, desire, all towards or with Arin. How could he be so selfish, though? Does he really insist on continuing his relationship with Arin if it was built on lies? Arin didn’t know what he was, and if they did fall in love with one another, and Dan became an angel again, he’d have to tell Arin the truth, and Arin would break all over again. He knew it. He knew the type of person Arin was. His pure insecurity towards creating a connection as deep as love when he’s already been burned before. The trust would be shattered like a mirror. As much as you try to mend a mirror, the crack will always be there, staring back at you, just waiting. Waiting for you to make another wrong move so it can crack all over again, ruining it’s integrity even more. 

As Dan wept and his tears seeped through the denim of his ripped-up jeans, coating his taste buds in salt, and staining his cheeks; he gave in to utter exhaustion. He felt like he no longer could do anything. The thought of his wings and magic had never seemed quite so far away until now. Was it time to give up before it had even begun? He had never done so much work, put in so much effort to be miles out from the goalposts. 

Dan wrapped his arms around his knees even tighter, hoping to curl up into a ball so tight he just imploded. Something had to give. Everything was so unyielding. So strained. So Dan cried himself to sleep on the bathroom floor, hoping sleep would give him even a few minutes of relief. 

————

Bang. Bang. Bang. 

Silence. Shivering. Cold tiles. 

_Bang!… Bang! Bang!_

Wh-?

**_Bang! Bangbangbangbangbang!_ **

Dan cracks open crusted eyes, having fallen into a sort of coma on the bathroom floor. He grabs for his phone from beside him, the time reading a bright three-thirty-two am. The banging started again. 

Dan hadn’t been asleep long enough for the hangover to kick into full gear yet, nor the alcohol wear off entirely. He was in this weird limbo state between the two and he still felt disgusting. Begging to stop the racket, Dan unstuck himself from the tile, searching for the source of the banging. 

He should’ve guessed, the front door. Who could be here at this kind of time though?

Dan opens the door to none other than Arin, who looks bad, if not worse than himself. 

Before Dan can wet his mouth enough to say anything, Arin storms in past him, kicking the door closed with his heel, pressing his back against it. 

“You are not going anywhere this time, you absolute fuck!” 

Dan looks on in disbelief. He could barely see Arin in the small amount of light shining up into his apartment from the street lights below. “Huh?”  
  


“I _cannot_ sleep because of you! Who the _fuck_ just runs away after kissing someone like that? Just fuckin’ ‘Okay, fuckin’ bye!’ or whatever? Like _fuck,_ dude. Shit. You kiss me to tell me you like me and then you leave me behind all alone like you hate me! What am I supposed to glean from that interaction? That’s like the most confusing shit ever!” Arin rambles _at_ Dan, instead of to him, “Couldn’t you just like…wait? Like? So I could say something?”  
  


Dan blinks as the verbal onslaught chugs ahead, “Arin….Arin, stop.”  


“'Oh, I’m Dan and I kiss people and then run away like a fucking dumb asshole coward!’ Am I just supposed to be okay with that? Go on with my day as normal? Have a nice lunch? Do my grocery shopping? Wave ‘hi ‘to Barbara across the street? Man, I fucking hate Barbara anyway. What was I talking about? Oh yeah! How you’re a fucking asshole who kisses and flees. I’m not a Pokémon battle, Dan! You can’t just run if it gets too much for you! What about me? How am I supposed to deal with that? _You_ kissed _me!_ And I liked it, and you would _know_ that if you had just stayed put for a few seconds! But you didn’t because you suck!” 

  
Arin pants once he finishes as if he’d put so much passion behind his words it had tired him out. He just stares at Dan with huge sad eyes not knowing what came next.

Dan doesn’t even know what to do. He didn’t have a response. He felt something tingle inside him. Here Arin was, standing in a state in front of him. Here Dan was, a fallen angel who’d drunk himself into a vodka coma. Two grown-ass men who’d fallen for one another, making everything so complicated, but together…it just seemed so simple. 

Dan starts to giggle.

Arin recoils like Dan had finally snapped.

Dan devolves into fully-fledged laughter, clutching at his stomach. “Oh! Fuck…Arin…Fuck!”  
  


“What…?” Arin mumbles, vexed, “What’s so funny? I’m bearing my soul here, man!”  
  


Dan slows his roll, crossing his arms softly, cocking his head and locking his gaze squarely on Arin, “I like you. I really like you, Arin. If you can’t deal with that I suggest you build a fucking huge-ass, stable-ass bridge and get your sweet ass over it because I, Leigh Daniel Avidan Sexbang the first, like _you,_ Arin Hanson!” 

“The first?” Arin mumbles again, like that was the important part of what he just said, “The first?” Arin repeats himself before he loses his footing with the words, starting to laugh too.

The mood in the room lifted. Two middle-aged men, crushing on each other, crying with laughter at three-forty in the morning. 

Arin closes in on Dan once his laughter edges away, taking his shoulders and pushing him back into the wall, crashing their lips together. 

Everything that had ever mattered to Dan, everything that held him back from feeling good about this relationship, everything that worried him to tears earlier melts away in an instant. All that really mattered now was Arin and his kiss, just like how it was that morning.

Dan throws his arms around Arin’s form, pulling their bodies close together, giving himself up completely while kissing Arin back. Their kiss evolved into different variations of itself. Soft, hard, gentle, strong, messy and ended up being a full-on make-out session. 

Like all good things, eventually, the kiss petered off and both Dan and Arin kept their eyes closed, resting their foreheads against one another. Their bodies pressed close, breath intermingling. They bask in one another’s presence. 

Arin breaks the blissful silence, “I like you too, Dan.”

Dan giggles softly, “I know. Your half-chub proves that.”  
  


Arin’s eyes shoot open, stumbling back and checking himself.

Dan flails his arms about in an attempt to stifle another wave of giggles, “Kidding! I’m just kidding!”  
  


“That’s fucked up, Avidaniel!”  
  


“Aw. You gonna cry?”  
  


“I’ll give you something to fuckin’ cry about!” 

Dan steps forward, shoving Arin playfully, “Awww…the wittle baby boy is gonna cwy! It’s okay, Big Cat, I’m here for you.”  
  


“Hell yeah, you are!” Arin grabs Dan’s wrists, “I’m not letting you go anywhere this time.”  
  


“I’m not running.” Dan narrows his eyes mischievously, “You’re gonna have to physically pry me away from you. With like, one of those conveniently stashed crowbars in video games. ”

Arin smiles the biggest Dan had ever seen. He looked just like how he did in the pictures with Suzy. Whole and glowing. Happy. “So what now? What about everyone in the office? What about the lovelies? Are we keeping us a secret? Do we want everyone to know that we are…the big gay?” He jokes.

“No way am I keeping you a secret!” Dan exclaims, “Plus…I think everyone always kinda suspected we were the big gay…except for us.”  
  


Arin nods, “So us…We’re like…um?"  
  


“An item?” Dan completes Arin’s question, “You’re the boss. You decide.”  


  
Arin gets insecure, like the few minutes before he had asked Suzy out for the first time, “I… I would like to be…”  


“I accept!”  
  


Arin blows a raspberry at him, “You had me all worried and everything too! I think there’s a groove in the floor where I paced for the last day. I thought we were gonna have this big, tearful exchange and decide to part ways, or something. Be all, ‘I do feel for you, but alas, I must set you free, my sweet’!”   
  


“What is this?” Dan escapes Arin’s needy grip, heading into the kitchen with a delighted flourish, “The 1800s? Are we a Jane Austen novel? I must insist, I’d play a fucking sick Mr Darcy!” 

“What I’d give to see you exiting a pond in a see-through shirt.” Arin fans himself, following Dan like an excited puppy.

“I’d pay good money to see _you_ do it, though.” Dan purrs back, “Regardless of Pemberley estate, and the sopping wet clothing, I do really like you Arin. This time, I swear to you, I’m not running anywhere.”


	11. A Scorned Suspicion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything seems to be going well for the new couple. While Dan harbours some concerns regarding his angel residency, he lets it go for a while, attempting to enjoy himself for the first time since he landed on Earth. Arin, however, is riddled with suspicion. Despite his feelings for Dan, whenever he gets the chance, he ransacks Dan's house in the pursuit of knowledge about who Dan really is, as it becomes clear Dan is being very shady when asked about his past. Upon finding a second phone hidden behind Dan's toilet, Arin suspects Dan is leading some kind of double life, and confides in Ross, who soon becomes equally concerned, but not for the same reason.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wanted to maybe put a chapter of fluff between this chapter and the prior one, but to me, it seemed pointless and like filler, so I thought I might as well cut to the chase. It's not as if this relationship hasn't been chaotic enough already, lol! 
> 
> Thank you so much for the kind words on the last chapter! I'm going to really try and round this all up nicely but I'm working through these muddy bits first! Thank you for your ongoing support and kudos! I love knowing that someone is reading my work and enjoying it! <3
> 
> \----

About a fortnight had passed since Arin and Dan had become an official couple. Pretty much everyone had been supportive, whether in person or online. Certainly the Lovelies especially, some even claiming they had called it before it had even happened. 

Dan still found himself struggling with certain aspects of the relationship, but he’d already started familiarising himself with Earth better in an attempt to get used to it, in case he had to stay for Arin. An opinion that was becoming more and more likely as the days went forward. When he wasn’t at work, with Arin or with Ross, Dan had been taking driving lessons, taxi-ing to places and getting used to LA. He had to admit, he felt more separated from Heaven as the days passed, and with Arin, he sure as hell wasn’t about to start looking for other ways to get back in. The lack of his wings and that angel sparkle that he missed had become more of fond memories already.

When he did, however, experience homesickness, Arin would always comfort him, explaining they could go on a trip to Jersey to visit his family, if he wanted. Dan would always sadly shake his head, just giving Arin a smile, explaining that it would pass, and he was just happy to be with him. While Dan would adore going on a trip with Arin, it wasn’t like he could just take a day trip to Heaven at any time. That never stopped Dan from daydreaming about it though.

He could imagine both his parents happy for him, that he finally found someone after Erin. That he gave up bed-flitting tendencies and found happiness with someone else. 

Arin, whilst delighted with the way things turned out, the more time Arin spent with Dan the more suspicious he became. He didn’t understand why Dan would recount many experiences that happened since they met, Dan was especially distant about his past. When asked about his childhood and adolescence Dan would sort of shutdown, almost as if he didn’t quite know what to say, shrugging his shoulders and saying that it was fine, and that there was nothing special about it.

Arin recalled Ross saying not to become upset if Dan refused to tell Arin about parts of himself, so he was trying his hardest, but if Arin ever woke up earlier than Dan at his place, he would go searching. He’d pull open drawers. Inspect shelves and pictures. Really, really, who was Dan Avidan? Where had he been, who had he met, what had he seen? He’d make up his mind to talk to Dan about it but whenever Dan gave him that tired, easy morning smile, Arin would forget about everything.

Dan didn’t know Arin had suspicions and Arin didn’t know Dan had concerns because when they were together everything seemed okay. Everything seemed just perfect. 

_Game Grumps_ episodes were becoming increasingly better and more comedic at the closeness they were now, and their viewership witnessed a significant spike. In meetings, Arin would hold Dan on his lap, and everyone could feel Dan’s possessive nature should anyone seem to make Arin laugh harder than he could. Everything seemed to be going well on the surface. 

However, this morning Arin had found cigarettes in Dan’s drawers. As far as he knew, Dan didn’t smoke or at least didn’t around him. As confusing as it is, Arin doesn’t bring it up. Dan knew Arin was straight-edge and probably didn’t want to upset him.

It was a morning like any other, Arin had made coffee for the two of them and Dan was on some tangent about how if Arin kept making him play scary games he might have to kill him. 

Arin laughs, “What? Kill me? That’s a bit extreme, isn’t it? How would you do it? Would you go all axe-wielding homicidal maniac style? Or would you, like, be super coy about it? Or make it look like some kinda fuckin’, like, suicide?”  
  


Dan ponders, “Well, I always thought that if I were a serial killer, I’d be the kinda one with a calling card! Like, leaving something at the scene, so the police would have to give me one of those cool pseudonyms. Like…a single rose, and then they’d call me ‘The Gardener.’” He raises an eyebrow, putting on his best 1950’s police voice, “‘Ah see, with this rose, it musta been ‘The Gardener’.” He grins widely, “See, how fucking sick would that be?” 

Arin sips his coffee, giving Dan a look over the rim of his glass, “If you killed me and left a rose at the scene though, it’d just make you look like a scorned lover.”  
  


“Ah, see, that’s where you’re wrong because I am _not_ scorned.”  
  


“How would the police know that?”  
  


“Because I’d be so chill and easy-going. Even so, they’d never suspect me anyway, I’m too attractive, and everyone knows attractive people never kill people.”  
  


Arin scoffs, “You must never have met the _True Crime_ community.”

“It’s not really my cup of tea.” Dan shrugs, rounding Arin and wrapping his arms around his waist from behind, “You are though.” 

Arin goes red in the cheeks, he still wasn’t completely used to Dan’s displays of affection yet. Additionally, stuff like this always made Arin think about what Dan might be like in bed. Though it was a few weeks into their relationship and they had slept in the same bed a few times, it had never gone further than that yet. 

Arin squirms a little to turn around and get a better look at Dan, who just stared back at him fondly, million-dollar smile plastered on his face. Arin loved how Dan’s hair never looked the same, but was always a mess of perfect curls, how he was never perfectly shaved,how deep his eyes were. Arin loved pretty much everything about Dan and it was always stuff like this that made Arin forget about stuff he found, or more likely, stuff he _couldn’t_ find.

Arin’s brain completely blanks again when Dan’s lips meet his, only knowing now to respond. Their lips fit together just perfectly and they both loved how the other tasted. More often than not they’d be kissing for longer than either of them realised. 

When Dan finally retreats for breath Arin was left just as dazed as usual, “I need t’ use the bathroom.”  
  


Dan giggles, “Well, I mean, you know where it is.”   


  
Arin nods, hobbling away, goofy smile on his face, feeling all glowy.  
  
———  
  
Arin was washing his hands in the bathroom, accidentally knocking the soap off the counter, cursing and leaning down to pick it up from next to the toilet. Before he can lean back up to replace it, he catches the sight of something stashed behind the toilet. Confused by its shape, he reaches for it, pulling it free from its hiding place.

Arin stares at what comes loose for a good few minutes before he even quite knows what to do. A phone similar to Dan’s own kept in a ziplock bag. A few things cross Arin’s mind. Drug dealer? Burner phone? Shady side business? Criminal? and then finally, he blurts out the last one “Cheating?”.  
  


Arin feels awful but his curiosity never fails him. Why hide a phone if it wasn’t a big deal? Is this why Dan is always so shady? Is it his? If it _is_ a big deal than Arin _has_ to know why this phone is here, and while he could ask Dan, there’s no reason why he couldn’t just make something up. If he’s already being closed off about his past, what would make him change his tune? 

Arin pulls open the bag, being greeted by a lock screen. Fuck. Face ID. Arin presses his lips together. “Shit.” He whispers, placing it back in the bag and tucking it behind the toilet again. He’d have to think about it later. 

He almost falls flat on his ass when he hears a knock at the door, “You alright in there? It’s been a while.”  
  


“Yeah! I-I’m fine!” He stands up, pulling the door open with a very forced smile on his face, “Just weird stomach…You know how it is.”  
  


“Yeah?” Dan stumbles back with surprise, “I have those stomach issues…so yeah…I know…” He’s a little weirded out by Arin’s smile, “But um…we’re gonna be late for work. So you gonna drive me or what, Big Cat?”  
  


Arin nods, mind whirring with an endless path of possibilities for that phone to be there. What is it’s purpose? “Yeah. Let’s go.” Arin turns stiffly and heads to the front door, pulling his keys from the kitchen counter.

“Hey, Dan?” 

“Mhm?” Dan says, pulling on his jacket.  


  
“You’d never lie to me, right?”

Dan is visibly taken aback, “That’s a really weird question.”  
  


“Just answer it.”  
  


Dan’s a little hurt but shakes his head, “No.”  
  


A knife of guilt hits Dan right in the chest as he answers. It’s not like he _wanted_ to lie about anything to Arin. He wished more than anything that he could be honest about who he was, what he was doing here, where he really comes from, but he couldn’t. It’d ruin everything and it was just so farfetched Arin would never believe it anyway, even if he had proof, even if Ross vouched for him. 

A collection of emotions fly behind Arin’s stare, but he just nods and heads out the apartment block with Dan behind him.

Suddenly the air was strained and Dan couldn’t place why. Everything seemed fine this morning. Was Dan just dense? Did he do something wrong? 

The car ride is quiet and uncomfortable. It reminds him of the first time he and Arin met. Arin seems occupied by something. Every time Dan tries to start conversation Arin shoots him down in three words. By the time they reach the office, Dan had stopped trying. 

———-

At lunch Dan had run out to get something from a nearby fast food place, even though he could’ve ordered in, he wanted to escape the suddenly really uncomfortable atmosphere that had manifested itself. Jokes weren’t landing, Arin wasn’t playing off Dan in the way he usually did. He seemed really caught up in something, and it was clear the jokes he was using had too much thought behind them, because they weren’t coming naturally. 

Arin knocks at Ross’ office door, who pulls it open. 

“Hey man, what’s up?”  
  


“Can I talk to you about something?” Arin looks clearly concerned and this makes Ross move aside almost instinctively, offering a seat to him after closing the door. 

“What’s got you like this?” Ross asks, sitting back at his desk, across from Arin. 

Arin looks at Ross, laughing weakly, “It’s funny because I’m your boss, but it looks the other way around now.”  
  


“Y-Yeah?” Ross seems puzzled, “So…what’s up?”

“This morning I asked Dan if he would ever lie to me.” Arin begins, “And he said he wouldn’t.”  
  


Ross nods, “And?”  
  


“Well, the only reason I asked was that I found a second phone in his bathroom.”

This piece of intel hits Ross like a bat to the back of the head and sends him spinning, “What?”  
  


He’s genuinely shocked. There should be no reason for that. No way Dan had enough money on him to buy a new phone with all the taxis he was taking, nor should he need one since he had the one Ross gave him. Why did he have a second phone? What was it for? Why didn’t Dan say anything to him about it? What the _fuck_ was Dan up to?

“I mean, right?” Arin taps his fingers on the desk, “Like…is he a drug dealer? Why was it hidden there so neither of us could find it?”  
  


“Did you open it?”  
  


“It was locked with face ID. I really don’t want it to seem like I don’t trust him, Ross, but Dan’s been so shady about everything. It makes no sense to me. He’s my boyfriend, best friend, but he’s also an employee…I don’t….I can’t know what to do. What if I’m dating a criminal?”

“He’s not a criminal.” Ross knows that for sure, Dan hasn’t been on Earth long enough to start a life of crime outside of his task, but that is only what makes it more bemusing that he has that second phone, “But you need to get into it.”  


  
“Why?”  


  
“I don’t think he’s gonna tell either of us if we ask, but Dan is a good liar. So we need to do our own investigation.”  


  
Ross had to admit, he was manipulating Arin here for his own gain. He had to know why that phone was there. Missing something like that could jeopardise his whole operation. He might’ve been helping Dan along the way but he’s also running a job here. He also has to report to his superior. If he’s lost track of what’s going on then it puts him in a bad position. He could end up reporting back to Lucy herself, and no one wants that.

“It makes sense that he has it if he’s cheating on me…but how do I open it without his face?”  
  


“C’mon man, you’re not that stupid. Do it while he’s asleep.”  
  


“Number one, he’s a light sleeper. Two, I know Dan has picked up on my weirdness, what if he doesn’t want me staying with him tonight?”

“Dan’s a huge softie. Just apologise, say you’ve got something on your mind and it’s not his fault. Play it cool, everything’s fine and normal. Since he’s a light sleeper…well,” Ross thinks on this for a while, “Get him drunk.”

“What? I don’t want to lie to him! And also, unlike him, I’m an awful liar!”  
  


“Do you want to find out if he’s cheating or not?” Ross exclaims, trying to bite back how heated he’s getting. Dammit, Dan! This isn’t just your life you’re fucking up here!

Arin jerks back, “Fine! Fine, fine. I’ll try.”  
  


“Report back, okay? I want to know too.”  
  


Arin looks confused but nods regardless, “Okay. Okay. I’ll do it.” 

————

For the rest of the day, Arin does the best he can to act like everything’s okay. For a while, he even convinces himself he’s overreacting. Dan must have a totally innocent reason for hiding that phone. Maybe it’s embarrassing, something completely harmless? He keeps coming back to it though, it doesn’t make any sense.

Luckily for Arin, Dan seems a bit calmer now Arin seems somewhat back to normal. 

Once they’re back at home, Arin finds some wine, pouring Dan a glass and setting it in front of him.

“What’s this for, babe?” Dan asks, picking it up curiously, “You don’t drink…?”  
  


“But you do!” Arin sits down next to him, “And I wanted to apologise for being all weird this morning.”  
  


“You don’t have to apologise for that.” Dan laughs softly, taking a drink of wine, “What was that about, anyway? Damn. This is pretty good wine.”  
  


“Just got in a mood. Wasn’t a big deal. You know when somethin’ just kinda, crosses your mind once in a while and you get all weird about it?”  
  


Dan tilts his head, “Not really, but I guess that makes sense.” He leans in to kiss Arin’s cheek, “You can confide in me though, you know?”

“Can I?”

“Of course. There are no stupid questions, but that Hanson, is a stupid question.”

Arin bites his tongue, “Mm…well, I did about Suzy anyway, so, no worries there. You know you can talk to me about anything going on in your life too. Literally anything. I promise I’ll never judge. I’ll listen to you.”  
  


Dan leans back and basically chugs the rest of his glass, reaching for the bottle again, “Um…yeah.” He winces while Arin can’t see his face. This sucks. All he wanted was a happy relationship. He hopes that maybe after the three months are up he can let this go since he’ll have nothing to hide anymore. “Lying to you is too difficult.” 

Arin watches him top up his glass, not liking how Dan’s back tensed up. “Okay.”   
  


They spend the rest of the night binging a series on Netflix that they’d started together. Arin getting caught up in his thoughts again, getting nervous about what comes next as Dan starts to get drunk, eventually dozing off on the couch. 


	12. Gas-Lit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin confronts Dan about what he found on Dan's secret second phone. With a little (not so) sage advice from Ross, Dan manages to convince Arin he dreamt it all up and Arin has no choice or evidence to believe otherwise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello :) me again.  
> So I spent a little longer on this considering I didn't know if my original plan for this chapter was okay, but it reads alright, so I decided to stick to it.  
> I feel awful for Arin, and this chapter really makes Dan seem like a total dick, but he does have a reason.  
> Enjooooy :D
> 
> \---

Arin held the phone above Dan’s sleeping face longer than he had to in order to unlock the phone. A sick feeling sat in the pit of his stomach. He wasn’t sure he was ready for whatever was on this phone. He hoped still that there was some reason Dan would have this that would be completely innocent. Though there was no reason he could think of. No reason why it would be hidden, fully charged, waiting to be found. 

Pulling the phone away from his sleeping partner Arin stared at the home screen. So it was true. Dan’s face was the one to unlock this phone. 

Arin now quite literally felt sick. He wasn’t sure he could take another heartbreak. He was too soft for that. He knew he was too soft for that. Arin had taken a big gamble on Dan. He was his cohost, business partner and best friend but as he sat there staring at the phone in the dark, he kept thinking about how he didn’t even know who Dan really was. That stung enough. 

Slowly Arin plucked up the confidence to go searching through the phone while Dan dozed next to him. First, photos. Nothing. Completely empty. Text messages? 

Oh?

**Dan:** _Call me._

**Brian:** _At work. Can’t right now._

**Dan:** _Call me soon. Need you rn._

**Brian:** _Are you okay?_

**Dan:** _Need help. Just call me when you get the chance._

**Brian:** _? Okay, fine._

Who is ‘ _Brian’?_ Arin ponders. Dan had never mentioned this name in his life before. Dan sounds pretty close to whoever this ‘Brian’ is. Arin scrolls further back in the text thread.

**Dan:** _Briiiiiii. I miss you ; _ ; Why can’t you come down here too?_

**Brian:** _You know there’s no way for me to do that._

**Dan:** _I know…but I need you. You’re so good at all this shit…call me soon? I don’t know what to do about Arin._

**Brian:** _He’s all you ever talk about on the phone._

**Dan:** _Jealous?_

Okay, now Arin was confused. That specific chat was from three weeks ago. A week prior to Dan and himself becoming official. Additionally, why was this the only text chat on this phone? Unless Dan was super pedantic about keeping his tech clean, which Arin knew he wasn’t, Dan only used this phone exclusively to keep in contact with this _‘Brian’_.

The messages didn’t sound malevolent, however. These two sounded close and, well, friendly. Arin’s mind immediately shot to the worst outcome and stayed there. This must be Dan’s long-distance boyfriend from NJ. Why else hide a relationship like this? Why was Dan so truthful about his love with Erin, but not Brian?

Arin set out to do some more exploring, scrolling further back in the text chat. 

**Brian:** _Remember this?_

Underneath this text sat a picture of Dan and who Arin could only assume was Brian with…angel wings on? They were standing outside a high-school, both smiling, each holding a scroll. Arin couldn’t quite make out the name of this specific high-school, as the letters were partly cut off, but Dan looked much younger, standing next to Brian. 

“-Aven’s Peak High school?” Arin whispers, reading out what he could see of the high school's name in the picture.

This photo was all kinds of weird. What kind of school has a full white suit and blue tie kind of uniform? Why are all the students in the back wearing wings, along with Brian and Dan? Why does the floor look so misty? 

Arin’s brow furrowed, looking for Dan’s response.

**Dan:** _Haha…jeez. You still have this picture? You sentimental bastard! We look so young._

**Brian:** _I thought you’d appreciate some memories from home while you’re down there. The only reason you’re even holding that diploma is ‘cuz you wanted to follow Erin to that super prestigious university._

**Dan:** _What did I say about mentioning that name?_

So, it’s become clear that Brian is a childhood friend of Dan’s, but it all just got even more confusing, and it was pissing Arin off to no end. Why? Why was Dan hiding this phone? It didn’t make any sense! 

Arin checks the call log. Nothing but calls to Brian. He checks the contacts, no one but Brian. He wanted to check Brian’s area code, to be sure he was in New Jersey. It would explain why Dan never wanted to go on a trip there with Arin, but upon opening the contact to check the number, Arin could not read it for the life of him. Like a picture taken with slow shutter speed, the numbers appeared all blurry, and no matter how many times he rubbed his eyes, or tried to clear his vision, the numbers remained hidden. 

Something was fishy. Or even worse. Arin could make sense of none of this. The feathered wings. The misty floor. The single contact, the blurry number, the extra phone. None of it added up to anything simple. There was no obvious equation. Something like this almost made Arin want Dan to have been a drug dealer. At least then he might be able to convince Dan out of his life of crime. This made Dan seem like he was from a totally different world. 

————

It appears Arin had fallen asleep after tucking the phone back where he found it after reading through Dan and Brian’s entire text chat, even though he never thought he would. 

It was so unusual, him waking up after Dan, who was in the kitchen due to the sound of mugs and plates being moved. 

Arin uses every last ounce of his strength to lift himself off the couch, white-hot with anger. Sleeping on stuff like this never makes anything better. 

Arin shambles into the kitchen, perching himself in a stool at the kitchen island. 

Dan looked over, easy as ever, that gorgeous smile on his face. God-damn. If only Arin hadn’t found that phone.

“Hey, you.” Dan leans on the kitchen island across from Arin, “You slept in, yet I was the one who had the wine.”  
  


“Yeah. uh…” Arin doesn’t know what to say when he sees Dan this way. Early morning sun catching the colour of Dan’s hair, still in a beaten up band hoodie, hair more of a mess than usual. It reminded Arin of premarital bliss. Or marital bliss. Either one, really. He hated to break it, but his curiosity ate at him. “I… didn't sleep well.”  
  


“I’m not surprised!” Dan laughs, “We both slept on the couch! It’s not big enough for the two of us, even if it means we’re closer.” He winks at Arin.

Arin just comes out with it, “Who’s Brian?”

The air immediately is sucked from the room. The colour dulls. Time freezes and Dan’s face pales, losing his smile immediately.  
  


“What did you just say?”  
  


“I saw the phone, Dan. Who’s Brian?” Dan can’t respond for a minute, just utterly stupefied. “You should’ve hidden it better.”  
  


“Well, excuse me. I didn’t know you’d go searching for a phone!” Dan responds defensively. 

“I didn’t look for it! I dropped something and boom, there it is! A fucking second phone! For why, Dan? What’s it there for? I didn’t look for the phone, but I will admit, I searched your place.”

Dan frowns, dodging the questions flung his way, “Oh yeah? And what did you find?”

“Cigarettes. You don’t smoke. How weird. Were you going to send them to _Brian,_ Dan? Were they for him?”

“You don’t know me at all, Arin. I _do_ smoke when I get stressed. I smoke like a train. They’re _my_ cigs. You know the last time I smoked, for who? It was over you. Because I had just kissed you and _someone_ didn’t respond. And no. They aren’t for Brian.”

“You’re right! I don’t know you at all! And again, _who is Brian,_ Dan?”

Dan bites his lip, breaking eye contact, “He’s a friend.”

“Then why do you need another phone?” 

Dan glares at Arin for a second, heading out of the kitchen, returning with the phone, tossing it on the counter, “Arin. I don’t have an answer.” 

Arin feels Dan’s words stab him, knocking the wind out of his sails. “What?”  
  


“You just have to trust me. Do you not trust me?”  
  


“Not really, Dan! You pop up from nowhere, claiming you’re from Jersey, but I don’t see any photos, do you? I don’t see anything in this apartment that tells me anything about you at all. There’s no trace of you anywhere online. It’s like a setup. Who are you? Is your name even Dan?”

“Christ. Dumb question after dumb question. Yes. I’m Dan. Yes. Brian is just a friend. Yes. This apartment is bare.”  
  


“So why?” Arin swaps his angry tone for a pleading one, his eyes starting to sting with the burn of oncoming tears, “ _Why?_ Why do you need the phone?”

Dan hates himself immediately. He can’t sit here and watch as Arin starts to cry. He can’t let himself break his big cat this way.

“I’m not being myself.”  
  


“What?” Arin questions.

“I _can’t_ be myself.”

They’re both silent for a long while before Dan continues.

“The truth is difficult and unexplainable, but there are many reasons I can’t go into detail. Trust me when I say I wish I could tell you, but you’d never believe me.” 

“How do you know that, Dan? How do you know if you’ve never tried?” Tears roll down Arin’s cheeks, “Why bother lying? I gave myself to you and this whole thing is just built on lies?”

Dan winces, “Not entirely. I do care about you Arin. I do want to be with you.”

Arin goes to respond but is struck still, going stiff. His eyes roll back and he falls backwards, only to be caught in a trust-fall by Ross, suddenly appearing, looking up to lock eyes with Dan, “We gotta talk.” 

————

Dan watches Arin passed out on the couch. Ross inspects the second phone.

“Arin came to me about this, y’know? After he left I started thinking why you might have a second phone. Whatever it was, I knew it had to have something to do with Heaven, so I had no intention of actually letting Arin find out what that was. But this? This is such a huge violation of the rules.”  
  


“I know.”  
  


“I could get you both banished for this.”  
  


“I know.”  
  


“You fucked up.”  
  


“Goddammit, Ross! I know! You don’t think I know that?”  
  


“I don’t know how stupid you are, but considering you kept this, you’ve gone far beyond my expectations. I’m impressed!” 

“I don’t know what you’re smiling about. I just built an entire relationship off of lies, and then a demon knocked him out.”  
  


Ross huffs, “Regardless, thank you for telling me the full story. I know you can’t tell Arin, so I think the best course of action here is to get rid of the phone and act like it was all a dream.”  
  


“You’re…telling me to pretend that this never happened?”  
  


Ross nods, shrugging, “What’s the harm? It’ll save him from being crushed and this’ll all have been fake. Like if you cheated on him in a dream. He can’t be mad at you for that. Human’s are dumb. They often think their dreams are real until they wake up.”  
  


Dan scowls, “This is _my_ stupid human, though. That sounds like gas-lighting to me. It sounds manipulative.”  
  


“Well, not to pop your bubble or anything but you’ve been manipulating him this whole time. What’s a little gas-lighting if it saves you from having to explain you being a fallen angel? He’d never trust you ever again, feeding him such a far-fetched lie.”  
  


“But it’s not a lie!”  
  


“You honestly think he’d believe you? ‘Oh hey Arin, it's okay! Brian is just my angel friend who feeds me info on you from Heaven, no biggie! By the way, if you don’t fall in love with me within about a month I’m kinda fucked!’ Like, no.” 

Dan mulls that over, scratching the back of his neck, groaning loudly, “I hate this so much! I care about him so much, so why do I have to keep hurting him?” He leans down, running his finger across Arin’s jaw, pressing a soft, careful kiss to his lips, “I’m sorry, Arin. I’m sorry.”  
  


Ross makes a gagging sound but Dan couldn’t be bothered to react. He’d said this so many times: ‘All that matters is Arin’ but while he believed it, he certainly wasn’t treating this relationship like he meant that. This coupling between them was more trouble than it was worth for Arin. Dan wishes he could go back to his first day on Earth. Try everything he could to find Arin another human partner. He could quietly pine from the side, swallow his jealousy and keep his head down, just work on his task like he was supposed to. 

Ross tucks the second phone into his pocket, “I’ll leave you with sleeping beauty, but when he gets back up, pretend you have no idea what he’s talking about. I’ll pretend he never came to me and spoke to me about it. This will remain our little secret. Just so you know, my implication here is so far gone that if anyone was sent to check on me I’d be dead in the water, I’ve done one helluva lot for you. Keep that in mind. I value your friendship more than I value my job, so if you could stop being such an ass to me, I’d really appreciate it.”

Dan scowls but nods, “You’ve been a huge help, as much as I hate to say it, even with your questionable demon advice.” He sighs, “But right now, I don’t know what other advice there is, so we’re on the same page, don’t worry.”

Ross grins and leaves promptly. Dan moves around the apartment, changing his shirt, switching the places of things that Arin had left them last night. He also goes out to purchase a new bottle of the wine Arin had made him drink. Everything had to look different the moment Arin woke up. That way he’d start to doubt himself. 

Dan was a mess.

————

Arin woke up mid-afternoon, having been moved to the bed when he was sure last he remembered he was arguing with Dan in the kitchen. He gets up, feeling uneasy. He had no memory of ever falling asleep on the bed. 

He walks into the kitchen, where Dan fixes himself a mug of tea, in a different shirt than what Arin remembered him in, giving him a big smile. 

“You’re awake! I kept coming in to check you were still breathing. It’s like 2 pm, man!”  
  


Arin looks completely puzzled, “Wh-what?” He spins around to look at the apartment. Nothing was where he left anything last night, “I was awake this morning!”

Dan raises an eyebrow, “We must’ve missed each other, ‘cuz you were still next to me when I woke up.”

“We were arguing!” Arin insists, “You got drunk…and I found a phone?” He frowns, “Second phone…you put it on the counter.” He checks the kitchen island closely as if it might materialise from somewhere, “You were talking to someone called Brian on the down-low.”  
  


“Who’s Brian?” Dan stretches, “I don’t know a Brian.”  
  


Arin stands there, sorting through his memories, “No…no. We definitely fought right here! I started crying…I thought you were cheating…then you told me that…that he was just a friend…that you couldn’t be yourself.” 

Dan shakes his head, “That never happened.”  
  


He’d have to check why he lied so easily later.

Arin paces through the living room and kitchen while Dan watches him, heading into the bathroom too and checking behind the toilet. Nothing. 

“I swear…” Arin mutters once he returns to the kitchen, “I swear it happened! I told Ross about it. I’ll call him! He’ll tell you.”  
  


“Arin.’ Dan says, “Even if what you’re saying did happen, unbeknownst to me, who was clearly a big part of this fight we had supposedly…why would you tell Ross about it?”  
  


“He’s your friend…I thought he’d know about you being a drug dealer or cheating…but he was just as surprised.”

“Cheating?” Dan scoffs, “Drug dealer? While I was privy to a little pot in college, I never dealt drugs.”

Arin scrambles to the bedroom to snatch his phone off the nightstand, bringing it back to where Dan stood,keeping it on speaker while it rings. 

“You’re seriously gonna call Ross?”  
  


Ross picks up not moments later, “What’s up, dick-breath?”  
  


“Ross! Remember what I told you about Dan?”  
  


Ross is quiet for a second, “Arin…uhm…you say a lot about Dan. Which part?”  
  


Arin is clearly getting frustrated, “The phone, Ross! The second phone!”  
  


Ross laughs, “Dude…what are you on about?”  


  
“I came to your office, I confided in you about Dan having a second phone! Do you seriously not remember?”  


  
“It’s not that I don’t remember, I just think it never happened. I would remember something like that. It makes Dan sound like a dealer or some crazy shit like that.”

Dan laughs a little too, “That’s what I said!”  


  
“Oh, hey Dan! Listening in, huh?”  


  
“He’s trying to prove to me that I’m a cheater.”  


  
Arin immediately puts down the phone without so much of a word, turning to stare at Dan for a minute, cloudy behind the eyes. “It doesn’t make any sense…Did…Did I dream it? I dreamt all of that?”  


  
Dan shrugs, “I still don’t really know what you’re talking about, but I guess? I don’t have a second phone.”  


  
“Is this a fucking conspiracy? Are you and Ross colluding?” Arin tugs at his hair lightly, “Jesus Christ…Am I going crazy?”

“I don’t think it’s that big of a deal, Arin. You just had a vivid-ass dream.” 

Arin shakes his head, “I…I must’ve, right…? I must’ve. Because, like…you wouldn’t lie to me like that…right?”  


  
Dan shakes his head, though he wants to die. “No….I wouldn’t.”  


  
“Even if it was something huge like that?”  


  
“Yeah…even if it was something huge.” Dan keeps a thoroughly clueless mask on his face.

Arin huffs, sitting at the same stool he was this morning, “I’m…I’m sorry for doubting you? I just…It was…so real…?” 

Dan smiles reassuringly, “It be like that sometimes.”  


  
“Uh-huh.” Arin shoots him a weak smile back, “‘M sorry. I…I do trust you.”  


  
“You shouldn’t.” Dan quips teasingly, but behind his tone there lies the ugly truth. 


	13. One Month

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's been a few days since the second phone fiasco and Arin's guilt in doubting Dan has caused him to behave a little differently, the same goes for Dan. Regardless, their relationship moves forward and almost seems to be going even better than it was before. However, Arin still hasn't told Dan he loves him, and the clock is running down.
> 
> Ross talks to Brian on the phone he absconded from Dan, relaying the situation to keep him informed. They argue over who is really Dan's best friend, and Brian is unsure of Ross's advice to gaslight Arin. Ross defends himself, claiming Brian couldn't do any better, and they both hope that Arin finally admits he loves Dan out loud before Dan is stuck a mortal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not sure when I posted the last chapter, but I think this one is the soonest to come out after the previous one, feels like forever to me though, considering I didn't know what to do for this chapter. I had a basic outline but I rewrote it like a billion times before eventually settling with this version. I really do have too much time on my hands after University. 
> 
> Anyways, thank you so much for reading as always, I get the warm fuzzies every time I think about it! <3

_____________

“Hahaha!” Arin throws his head back, clasping his hands to his mouth as he attempts to get a handle on himself.  
  


It had been a couple of days since the phone fiasco had taken place and Arin had accepted that he had dreamt it all up. This however had caused some unforeseen circumstances to the animator. Arin had become excessively needy and clingy, feeling awful for doubting Dan in the first place, so desperate to just hold on to the happiness he found with the older male. 

Dan, on the other hand, had guilt eating at him since it had happened, and it had quite honestly put such a damper on his mood that he barely realised he had just under a month left until it was supposedly time for him to go or stay. Dan didn’t know if he could, though. He still didn’t even know if he _wanted_ to go home. His feelings towards Arin had grown exponentially and every day they just got even bigger. Any time the thought of going home and telling Arin the truth peeked into his thoughts, anxiety washed over him like a tsunami and gave him a huge headache. He did everything he could to stop thinking about it.

Dan’s only relief came with Arin attached. Them together in the _Grumps_ room, or them watching some really shitty _Netflix_ series together when they went home in the evening. They spent each night with each other, alternating houses. Dan preferred Arin’s house considerably. Everything there was actually built by Arin and it felt less like a set to be there. 

With Dan riddled with guilt at gaslighting Arin and making him behave like an overly-attached toddler, he had become a gift-giver. Every time he’d go out he’d get something for Arin. Ranging from a pack of gum to chocolates, stuffed animals, anime merchandise and all sorts. Each time Arin asked what the occasion was, Dan would shrug, claiming he was just a very generous person, when in reality it was an attempt to quell any feelings of culpability. Of course, as much as he tried, it never made him feel any better. Each time Arin would grin at him, he’d just see how much of a bad person he was.

If anything, this task had certainly been teaching Dan that in future he had to take responsibility for his shitty actions, and that the universe did not and never did revolve around him. It just made it clearer that he’d been an ultra-shitty person for too many years of his life to count, and he should definitely work on changing that. 

“What the fuck!” Dan giggles, “Why am I going backwards—? Oh, oh no…Was I just _lapped?_ ” He sputters, shaking his head in disbelief at the shitty racing game Arin had put on for them to play today, “Where did this game come from? _Hell?_ ” 

Arin laughs again, “I’m pretty sure it came out of a cereal box, actually. I’m not sure. I’m not sure how most of the games on the shelf got here. Most of them are from fans.”  
  


“Well, guess that helps with business expenses, right?” Dan runs his tongue over his teeth as he attempts to figure out how in the living hell this crap-cart his character was driving handled, “Don’t gotta buy games if y’all keep sending them into us, right?”  
  


“Right!” Arin smirks, “Internet stardom does come with its perks.” He says sarcastically. 

Dan matches Arin’s smirk, “That oozes with ‘Don’t you know who I am?’ energy.”

Arin takes that and runs with it like a baton pass, creating a whole bit around that quip. 

Whenever Arin would do that, Dan could never stop himself from dissolving into a laughing wreck, in awe of Arin’s sheer creativity. “How the hell do you come up with shit like that?”  
  


“I dunno, man. My brain works in mysterious ways, much like God.”  
  


Dan rolls his eyes at that, “Something tells me the big-G actually works off a very strict set of criteria.” 

“Oh yeah? What is it?” Arin chuckles, “And all the angels have to follow it?”  
  


Dan nods, “Oh, absolutely. You never know what might happen if they disobey him.”

“They might get smote. Mother-fucking smooote!” 

Dan shrugs, “I don’t remember the last time he ever personally smote someone.”

“Huh?” Arin glances towards him, confused. 

“I mean…in books or movies.” Dan attempts to save, “I feel more like…maybe…if an angel didn’t adhere to the rules they’d be banished to Earth… or something.” 

“Of course, because we just have angels walking among us human-kind. That makes a boat-load of sense, Avidaniel.” 

Dan laughs softly, if only Arin knew. 

“So, what do you wanna do after this?”  
  


Arin thinks about it as he finally manages to steer his car past the finish line, “We could eat?”  
  


“We ate two hours ago.” Dan reminds him, “You wanna eat again?”  
  


“What are you implying?” Arin squints at Dan, “I wanna eat _you._ ”  
  


Dan flops over, leaning against his boyfriend, “You’re not the first person to say that, but contrary to popular belief, I’m not sure this slender, sexy-ass body would have enough meat on it for you to really sink your teeth into.”  
  


“All the more reason to savour it.” Arin purrs, “ _Really_ take my time with it.” 

Dan looks up at Arin from where he’s leant against him, only to realise Arin was already looking at him. He’s caught like an animal in a trap in Arin’s gaze for a minute. This had happened a few times, Arin had gotten suggestive, and Dan had unwittingly become putty. They hadn’t been intimate in that respect yet, even though they’d slept in the same bed many times by now, not that Dan (or Arin, without Dan’s knowledge) hadn’t wanted to.

Dan shakes himself free, attempting to scour his brain clean of those thoughts, for now, realising they’re still recording. He sits up straight, pressing himself back into the couch. 

“Oh, while I’m sure the egobang shippers are going wild, I’m pretty sure the rest of the lovelies don’t want to hear about all that.”  
  


Arin lets him escape this time, “You’re free, but if I were you I keep an eye out for a stray yaoi paddle, or an _‘accidental glomp’_.” 

Dan absolutely loses his shit at that, just barely able to scrape his car by the finish line, tossing his remote away, falling right back into Arin’s side, “S-Seriously? _Accidental glomp?_ ”

“What? It’s been a while since the internet has seen my excellent verbiage in _Tumblr_ lingo.” 

Dan just laughs harder until his stomach starts to hurt and tears streak his cheeks, “You’re the worst!” He claims as Arin reaches forward to turn off the recording. 

By the time Dan gets his bearings, his head has descended into Arin’s lap, “Jeebus Christmas.” 

Arin leans down, pressing a surprise kiss to Dan’s lips. 

While the kiss catches Dan off-guard, his status as butter when it comes to Arin just reconfirms itself, leaning up to deepen the kiss. Despite the weird angle they are at, every kiss just gets better. 

Arin’s fingers gently move their way into Dan’s curls and Dan carefully touches a hand to Arin’s face. They might be in the _Grumps_ room for everyone to see them through the window, but Dan couldn’t care less and Arin had never cared to begin with, just so happy to be with someone he truly cares about.

As Arin breaks the kiss for breath, Dan is, as always, left breath- _less._

“You know I was telling the truth about you keeping an eye out?” Arin adds, raising an eyebrow at Dan lewdly.

Dan gives Arin a look that means ‘Seriously?’.

“I prefer you when you’re like a teddy. What is with you lately, anyway? You’re all over me. Not that I don’t enjoy it immensely, you just seem a little different.”  
  


In reality, Dan knew the answer to that, he’d been thinking about it earlier, but he wanted to hear it from Arin’s mouth.

“Am I not allowed to sexually desire my boyfriend, huh, Daniel? Am I not allowed to wanna bend him over and fuck the absolute fuckin’ shit outta him? Slam him up against a wall and totally nail that ass?”  
  


“Oh my God, Arin!” Dan swats at him, giggling through the words, “I’m being serious! Not just about the sex thing either. You literally won’t let go of me.” He leans up, moving to straddle Arin’s lap, draping his arms over his shoulders and moving in close to his face, lowering his voice sexily, “Am I really so delicious to you?” 

Arin actually goes red in the cheeks, not expecting Dan to be so bold. “W-…Wait.” He sighs, “It’s not that you’re not delicious. You’re just…you’re so good to me. Especially after that whole thing where I went crazy for a little a couple of days ago.” 

Dan feels strikes of guilt stab him in the gut, dropping his forehead against Arin’s, closing his eyes, “I’d never blame you or hate you over something like that.” He breathes, “Arin, you need to hear it from me: You’re so, so important to me. I don’t know what I’d do if I hurt you and you never forgave me.”  
  


“I’d always forgive you.” Arin says quietly, “Even if that whole phone thing was real…I’d always come around. As soon as you explained it properly, I’d have to forgive you. I like you that much.” 

Dan relaxes a bit, letting his head find a place to rest on Arin’s shoulder, “Mmm…And…if I disappeared…would you be angry?"  
  


“Sure I would. But I’d always come find you. Always. You told me you’re not gonna run anymore though, so I trust you.” 

Dan looks for the lie in Arin’s words, but can’t find one. He loved Arin’s sincerity. There were so many things he found he loved about Arin. He always felt lucky when Arin talked to him seriously like this. If only it weren’t for the circumstances. 

“I have tooth-ache.” Dan mutters. 

“What?” Arin replies, confused.

“I have a cavity…because that’s too damn _sweet!_ ” Dan exclaims suddenly, giggling and goofily flopping over to the side, moving off Arin’s lap, “You have to pay for the dentist. Stupid American health care system. You know if we lived in the UK, or better yet, Canada, we wouldn’t have to pay for the dentist?”

Arin shakes his head at the sudden change in direction but agrees, “Yeah, but you’d still have to wait twelve weeks to even get an appointment.” 

“What? My teeth would’ve fallen out by then!” 

Arin laughs and agrees.  
  
————————

Ross had the second phone he had taken from Dan sat on his desk in front of him, masquerading as _his_ phone, should anyone walk into his office. 

He leans close, inspecting it, almost shitting himself when it starts ringing. He throws himself back into his chair, clutching his chest, “Mother fuckin’… Nn…” He huffs, reaching forward and just deciding to answer it. 

“1-800-leather-daddies, what are you wearing?” Ross smirks, listening to the silence on the other end.

“If you were hoping to surprise me, Ross, you severely underestimate me.” Brian sighs, “What do you think I am, stupid?”  
  


“All angels are stupid to me, Brian. Even ones like Dan, who is my friend.” 

Brian scoffs, “As if you’re friends.”  
  


“Why haven’t I reported this to Lucy yet, then? She’d be mad-pissed to find two brain-dead angels are cheating on such an easy task. I do admit, however, that this is proving to be more difficult than the average love task.”  
  


“Touché.” Brian remarks, “Fine, then. Either way, I have this phone enchanted to let me know when it’s been taken from it’s proper owner. I didn’t think it’d be Arin, so I thought it might be you. I can guess, however, that since you have it, Arin may have located it originally.”  
  


“Yeah… I took it for safekeeping.” Ross kicks his feet up on the desk, “I knocked Arin out mid-fight, then told Dan to pretend it had never happened and Arin was just dreaming it all up.”  
  


Brian goes quiet, “What? Are you stupid?”  
  


“No, that’s you. We’ve already discussed this.” Ross cocks an eyebrow, “It was the best I could come up with at the time, okay? Even if Dan does break and tell Hanson everything, the big guy isn’t gonna believe that. He may look stupid bu—“  
  


“Flying feathers, do you never stop talking?” Brian interrupts him, “Dan has a heart, you know? It may not appear that way, but that guilt is gonna devour him.”  
  


“Maybe, but he’s only got like, what? A month left before he’s stuck to this place like glue. He’s gotta get a move on. A stupid second phone like this would cause unnecessary trust issues and Arin would never fall in love. Now I’ve taken the problem out of the equation, Arin is even more attached to Dan. He feels bad and doesn’t want to doubt him again. Isn’t that a good thing? Like you could come up with anything better.”  
  


“I could’ve if he had called me before taking your questionable advice.”  
  


“Listen, Dickweed. Who’s been here for him more while he’s down here, me or you?”

“I would’ve if I could’ve…”  
  


“No, no, no! Nuh-uh! You don’t get to use that excuse considering you cheated the rules to get a phone down here. If you knew how much I’ve done to get Dan out of jams and give him ins, you’d never have the balls to call him your bestie ever again.” 

Brian sounds displeased, “Don’t pretend you’re a better friend to him. I’ve known him since second grade. It’s dumb to fight with you about this since we both know you’d lose. So, I guess you’re never gonna let me talk to Dan again.”  
  


“Fuck no! Your interference has caused enough of a ruckus down here already.”  
  


Brian exhales to keep his composure, “So can you at least keep me updated? With only a month left, this time is critical to Dan.”  
  


“Mmm…what are you gonna do for me?”  
  


Brian laughs, “Please. Don’t pretend I’m not willing to give up my wings to go to my superior and tell them all about how you’re not doing your job properly and have a _bias_ towards your task-runner.” 

Ross pauses, a little taken aback since he’d always had the upper-hand before. “Uh…Uhm… Fine. Whatever. I’ll keep you updated, but no contact. Don’t go sending him another stupid phone too.” 

“I won’t. Just…how are they doing?”  
  


“Arin’s all over Dan. Dan’s guilt-stricken, sure, but he seems to be dealing with it in ways he can. Gifts, showering Arin in the attention he wants. Totally mooney over Arin. They can’t take their eyes off one another for even a second. They might as well fuck in the hallway. It’s like being in high-school all over again.” 

“…What high-school did you go to?”  
  


“If Heaven is a private school, Hell is like public school. Either way, so far they’re on track. All Arin needs to do now is get that little bit deeper. As soon as he says ‘I love you’ out loud, the task will be complete.”

“Then let’s hope he takes the plunge sooner rather than later. I can smell the smoke over the phone, so I’ll let you go, but if you don’t keep me updated, so help me —“   
  


“God? God can’t help you now, Feathers. But don’t worry. Dan, you, me and Arin are all on the line here. In a chess game like this, the more heads the better.” 


	14. Back to Heaven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin tells Dan he loves him, but what comes next?

\----

Arin lays awake tonight, looking over his sleeping boyfriend’s face. There was something about Dan’s face lately, like his brow was furrowed as he slept, as if he had problems.

Arin was sure Dan wasn’t his typical ‘type’ of partner. Whenever he had thought of going out with a guy in the past, someone like Dan never came to mind, but here he was, in bed with him.

So, maybe Dan wasn’t his typical date, but Dan wasn’t just his appearance. Even if he was, Arin was in no denial that Dan was actually incredibly attractive. Even so, Dan was special. He emitted some special light. He worked on Arin’s wave-length. Understood his weird humour and Arin felt Dan’s care for him every time he flashed that winning smile his way.

Arin, however, wasn’t dumb either. In fact, he was perceptive to boot and he knew something was wrong, he just couldn’t place what it was. Whenever he pressed, Dan would get quiet, tried to change the subject or suddenly become defensive. Arin would drop it, hating when Dan became upset with him, he wanted nothing more than to live in bliss with him.

Despite all this, something had become astoundingly obvious to Arin over the past couple days.

He was in love.

Dumbstruck and head-over-heels in love.

He hadn’t known if it was the right time to tell Dan, or even how to tell Dan. Arin had practised a couple of times in the mirror whenever Dan wasn’t around. He’d even started a note in his phone where he kept all the best lines he had come up with that, maybe, he could use when the time came…but what was the time?

When do you tell someone you love them? Is it an organic thing? Do you plan? Does it have to be a big thing? Does he have to come prepared with champagne and chocolate, or in Dan’s case, skittles? Would Dan even want to be confessed to like that?

They were already a couple so it shouldn’t be so difficult, as if, say, they were still dancing around each other’s feelings, but it still felt huge. It had only been two months, was it too soon to be making such a confession? Why hadn’t Dan done it yet instead? Did he feel the same? Was he still testing the waters? 

Dan still seemed as easy as ever. The most approachable guy in the world, but Arin was finding it harder and harder to talk to him every day because of this giant love block in the way. 

It wasn’t so difficult with Suzy, but they had been together for a while before Arin had dropped the ‘love’ bomb. It had also been so long since then, he’d practically evolved into a different person, and Dan was not Suzy. 

Even though Dan was so close, there still felt like a little bit of distance between them. Dan almost didn’t seem real. He was a little too perfect. Arin didn’t know _what_ denotation of perfect he meant, though. Dan wasn’t great at anything particularly. His style wasn’t classy. He was dynamic enough to fall outside of the scope of a perfect static figure in Arin’s life. So what was so perfect?

Everything. Everything that Dan was hit just the right notes with Arin. He was just right and Arin wanted to let him know, but how? 

He hoped maybe the opportunity would present itself soon. Maybe somewhere unexpected, but with enough notice that Arin could catch on, even with how dense and oblivious he could be. 

———

Dan had two weeks left, and he was feeling the deadline approaching like a raging bull.

He and Arin stood in the kitchen space at the _Grumps_ HQ. Ross had joined for a coffee not long after they had left the recording space for a short break. 

“Where did the assumption I was a furry even come from? _What_ is it about me that just _screams_ furry?” Dan pouts, flailing his arms about like a rag doll, “I’m not! There is nothing even mildly attractive about animal butts. Like, I’ve never looked at a cat and been like ‘Damn. I’d tap that’, y’know?”  
  


Arin snickers, “I hope not. I’d have to hide the cats from you whenever you came over.”  
  


Ross shrugs, “It’s not just that, though. I’m pretty sure it’s not just animals as you see them now. It’s, like, picture a rabbit, but in a human form, with tits.”  
  


Dan makes a face, “Fucking gross, Ross! What the fuck?”  
  


“Hey, hey. I’m not the furry here!”  
  


Dan whines again, “Arin! Ross is bullying me! Fire him already!”

“Fire me? I was your ‘in’ here, buddy! Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.”  
  


Arin nods, “He’s got you there.”  
  


Dan rolls his eyes, leaning against the counter, lowering his voice, “I wouldn’t bite your hand anyway, who knows where it’s been?”  
  


Ross smirks, holding his hands out and starting to chase Dan around the kitchen island. 

Though it was a little like being in daycare, Arin still appreciated moments like this. In fact, more often than not, he was the one to initiate the antics. Dan slows down, throwing himself onto the island and scooting back so his back is to Arin’s chest, “Ha! Suck on that, Ross!” 

Ross skids to a stop, “That’s no fun. What kinda pussy gets their boss-boyfriend hybrid to protect them?”

“People who have them.” Dan taps his chin, “Aren’t I just the luckiest?”

“Listen. I’m not the one who has to take a dick up the ass. I’m not sure ‘lucky’ is the word.”  
  


“Then what is the word?” 

The question floats from Dan’s lips and smacks Arin right in the face.

“Loved.” He blurts out. 

“Huh?” Both Dan and Ross turn to look at Arin, who sips his coffee quietly. 

Now was the time. He had Dan’s complete attention. There might be no gifts, no fireworks, no tears, but now was good. Now was just right. Now was care-free. It felt like the time. Arin had got what he had asked for a few weeks ago, a moment to land in his lap. He didn’t want to let this opportunity go. 

“Maybe the word is ‘loved’?” That sounds kinda stupid, he’d need to round it up a different way, “I’ll protect him from you because he’s loved…by me? I love him?”  
  


Dan and Ross’ eyes get as round as dinner plates.

The room gets quiet and Dan leans up, “Arin…what are you trying to say?” 

“Isn’t it obvious?” He huffs, getting all uncomfortable, “Do I have to repeat myself? I…love you, Dan.” 

—————-

Dan awakens in a blindingly white space, so bright it was like he was staring right at the sun. 

What had just happened? 

Dan tries to summon his brain to work. What did he remember?  
  


He was in the kitchen with Ross and Arin, and Arin had said…he loved him! 

Then there was this loud ticking, like a clock. It was deafening, all that had filled his head. Was he the only one who had heard it? No…no, Arin winced and clutched his hands to his ears when it happened. So where was he? Where did Arin go? What about Ross? 

Dan struggles to move, but it’s like he’s floating in suspended animation. He feels like he’s in the middle of sleep paralysis. Even when he closes his eyes, he can’t escape the bright white that’s all around him. 

Dan squints, eyes landing on a minuscule black dot on the horizon, like a speck of dust on a computer screen. The more he focused on it, the more obvious it became. It grew just a little bit, and a bit more. It was almost like when you pick at a hole in the fabric of your shirt and the fabric just seems to unravel more and more until the hole becomes so big you can slip your finger into it. 

Dan was convinced the black was coming towards him, and it wasn’t long until he realised he was right. Eventually, the dot became a rectangle, and the closer it came, the more Dan could see. It was a door. A beautiful, ornate black door with a decorative gold handle and it suddenly drew to a stop about twenty feet from him. 

Just as Dan begins to panic, he’s roughly dumped onto an invisible floor in the midst of all this whiteness. No longer unable to move, with only the door in front of him. Dan sits there, dumbfounded. Was he supposed to go inside? There seemed like nothing else to do. He felt drawn to it. 

Very carefully, he got to his feet and crept towards it, suspiciously. Was he supposed to knock? Something told him there was no need to. Gently, he reached forward and grasped the handle, cold to the touch. He pushed the door open, which swung open easily. He could see nothing but black space. A single spotlight lights a circle on the floor.

Dan wavers, but what else is there to do? Gingerly he steps inside, walking into the space and directly into the spotlight. A loud bang erupts around him and suddenly he’s surrounded by what looks like a courtroom. At the front of the court, a figure sits, but they are so bright, Dan can see nothing but a silhouette.

To the left of the judge sits the CEO who sent Dan down to Earth in the first place. To the right, Ross sits. At the witness stand is Arin who looks ill. 

Dan’s mouth falls open as all eyes fall onto him. He can’t force anything out of his mouth but a dumb sound of confusion. 

“Leigh Daniel Avidan.” A voice says. Dan can only assume it’s coming from the bright figure sitting at the judge’s stand, “Welcome to Heaven’s supreme court. Do you know why you’re here today?”  
  


Dan looks between Arin and the judge. Arin seems terrified, looking at Dan, pleading with him to explain what’s happening. 

“I…” Dan mumbles, “I’m—What? Heaven’s supreme court? Uh…”  


  
The figure continues, “Today’s topic of discussion is your return to Heaven’s ranks upon the completion of your task. Along with the restoration of your wings, magic and immortality.”

The CEO shakes his head, “I’m impressed. Avidan. I have to say, I didn’t have much hope, though your method in completing this task is certainly unique.”  


  
Ross clears his throat, “All criteria that was outlined in the task file was fulfilled, there was no stipulation claiming Leigh couldn’t make the human fall in love with him.”  


  
Arin raises an eyebrow, clearly even more confused. Human? Make? _Make_ him fall in love?

The judge speaks once more, “It’s true no stipulation was mentioned, and his task was completed. I must ask though, surely there are simpler ways to achieve success. If his main goal was to return to Heaven’s ranks, why choose himself to be the object of the human’s affections? It creates trouble, no?”

The CEO agrees shortly and Ross shakes his head, “I don’t believe it was originally his, um, intention. I believe it happened unwillingly. The subject was forced to make a decision between his feelings for the human, or the wellbeing of the task. He made the third choice to combine the two.”  
  


“Do you love this human, Leigh?”  
  


Dan looks at Arin who locks eyes with him. Dan could see rivers forming in Arin’s eyes as it all came together, like a jigsaw, finally completing the full picture. How everything that happened in the ‘dream’ he had must’ve been true. How many times Dan must’ve lied to him. Made him think he was crazy. How all along he was just a pawn to help Dan achieve a way back into Heaven. His best friend, his cohost, his lover…all a lie. Dan could see the heartbreak in Arin’s eyes. 

“Yes.” He answers, “I do love him.”  
  


“So you have a choice to make.” The judge seems to lean forward, “Do you wish for your wings, magic and immortality to be reinstated, or do you wish to continue your days with this…Arin Hanson? You will never be allowed to return to Heaven. There are no more chances. Make your decision wisely.”  
  


Dan looks between everyone on the panel. Ross presses his lips into a line, looking towards Arin. 

Dan finally turns to look at Arin again. 

“Arin…"  
  


“…You lied to me.”  
  


“Arin, I—“  
  


“You lied to me! You gaslit me! You made me think I was insane for doubting you! Not once did you ever tell me the truth.”  
  


“I did!” Dan exclaims, “My feelings for you were all the truth! All the moments we spent together. All the laughs, that was all the truth!”  


  
“No, it wasn’t! You were never yourself! That’s why I felt I could never close the distance between us! You were a fake! Complete fiction. A total forgery. I could never—would never be in love with someone like that! But you tricked me!” Tears fall from his eyes, dripping from his chin as he doesn’t bother to wipe them away, “You’re a liar!”  


  
“Arin, I do love you. I do want to spend my life with you. Couldn’t you tell? I wanted to tell you everything but I just couldn’t. Would you even believe me? Would you even give me that chance to explain it to you?  


  
“You never tried, Dan.” Arin shoots back at him, “Maybe! It’s a stretch, but maybe I would’ve. That’s how much I cared about you, Maybe if you had given me a chance, but it’s all just maybes. We’ll never know now, will we? Ross!” He snaps, “Was there a fuckin’ _stipulation_ regarding telling me the truth? The nature of this _task_?” He spits the words like they hurt to say, accusation heavy in his tone.

Ross drops his gaze, having never seen this side of Arin, “No…But—”  


  
“Enough!” Arin turns his eyes back towards Dan, and if looks could kill, Dan would be six-feet-under. “So? Did you ever even try?”  


  
Dan bites his lip, “I didn’t know how.”  


  
“Your excuses are meaningless to me.” Arin’s face goes hard, “You never loved me. I was just a stepping-stone, huh? I let you in and you used me.”  


  
Dan’s stomach churns and he wants to pass out, feeling like he needs to beg for his life, “I did! I _do_ love you! I would never use you to get back into Heaven. Why would I choose this way? This way hurts! I always knew it would hurt! I almost hoped you wouldn’t tell me you loved me until my task period was up, and I could say it back, stay with you forever! I could’ve chosen anyone else for you and exited your life, and you could’ve forgotten me, but I didn’t. I chose me for you.”

“How selfish.” Arin sucks in air through his teeth, and there’s a sharp quiet for a moment, “But I don’t want you."  
  


“What?”  
  


“I don’t _want_ you anymore, Dan. Congratulations. Welcome back to Heaven. Take your wings, magic and shit and go. Get me out of here. I never want to see you again. I never want to hear your name again, Liar.”  
  


“So…you want me to choose Heaven over you? I’d never be able to contact you again.”  
  


“Good.”   
  


“That’s what you want…?” Dan feels his knees buckle, dropping to the floor.

“That’s what I want.” Arin says with finality, “I want to go now.” 

Dan sits there for a while, eyes stinging with the salt of tears. 

Everything Arin threw at him stuck. It was true he was a liar and a user. Yet, he did love Arin. He’d never loved someone so much. Even Erin didn’t hold a candle to Arin, but here he was, watching him leave, letting him go. He wasn’t going to fight this. He deserved this. Everything he’d done in the past, all the bad things; the universe had chosen to give him his karma in one big dose. He would have to stand there and watch as the thing he loved the most tore out his heart and left him behind. 

He looks back up to the judge from his knees, pitiful. “I’d like to return to Heaven, please.” He whispers. 

He steals one last look at Arin before the courtroom fades back into white. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It only took 14 chapters to get here. 
> 
> Thank you for the kudos and comments <3 this is not the final chapter, but that should be obvious. Sorry for the angst!


	15. The Dust Settles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Dan gone, and Arin heart-broken, he tries to handle his feelings about the whole situation. Alone with no one to talk to, Arin calls on someone who knows him better than he knows himself, seeking advice on what to do now.
> 
> With all hope lost, Dan struggles with what he did, and what he became. Analysing what had gone down on Earth, and what he missed whilst he was down there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a little while. Not too long, I don't think. I've just been busy with University applications. This chapter has gone through many re-writes, I didn't know quite how to deal with the aftermath, but I think I got it down. They might be apart now, but I've got some ideas in mind for the forthcoming chapters after this one! 
> 
> Thank you for any reads, comments and kudos! As always, I appreciate it so much! This story is kind of an escape for me right now. This and GG's playthrough of Danganronpa! That shit is tight!

————

Arin stares at the idle title screen of some random game he’d shoved into some random console in the _Grumps_ room. 

He wasn’t entirely sure why he’d come to work today. To him, it just seemed like something to do to take up the time he had now. It felt so wrong, though. The recording had been on for about ten minutes now, and he hadn’t said a single word, nor had he started the game. It was like he was waiting for Dan to say something, but he wasn’t there. There was just an empty space next to him on the couch. He’d gotten so used to Dan leaning against him during the _Grumps_ sessions, usually snacking on some nondescript bag of crisps, or sweets, but now the empty space was blisteringly vacant. 

He sighs heavily, turning off the recording, flopping over into the empty space, pushing his face into the cushion. He could barely smell Dan, just the washed-out scent of his aftershave. 

It had been only a few days since Arin was cast out from Heaven’s supreme court, it seemed like nothing but a dream. Arin had questioned a few times if he was actually going insane. There was no feasible way that any of that could’ve been real. Dan, an angel? Ross, a demon? Heaven? Hell? It was like he was living in a sci-fi movie. When had his dream world swapped out with his actual reality? Arin maybe could discredit it all as some long crazy daydream had people around him not remembered Dan or Ross, but they did. They asked him where they were, when they were expected back, and Arin couldn’t say anything. 

Ross’ office was stripped by the time Arin had come back to work like he really was never there, but there was evidence everywhere. Dan had even left a hoodie around Arin’s place. Everything was where he had left it the night before he had been ‘found out’. 

Arin, in terms of emotion, _had been_ shockingly numb. The disbelief had worked it’s magic on him for the most part, but at that point, Arin knew the heart-break was on its way. He already missed Dan terribly. 

Yes, Dan had used him. Yes, Dan had done nothing but lie to him. It was toxic. However, when Dan swore to him that the feelings they shared were real, Arin believed him. Blind rage had fuelled his words and dismissal of the angel, but when Arin thought back, he wondered if he had been too harsh. Then he’d backtrack, assuring himself his feelings were one-hundred percent valid. Then Dan’s defeated face and words would fill his consciousness again, and just like that, he was caught in an endless cycle. He was in love, there was that much, but what now? Dan was gone like a gust of wind.

When the heart-break did actually hit Arin, he was halfway through a conversation with Barry. Barry had been asking if Arin knew anyone who needed a roommate, and Arin immediately thought of Dan, who had a spare guest bedroom in his apartment that never seemed to be used. He stayed around Arin’s most of the time, anyway. Then Arin remembered Dan was gone, his apartment stripped down to its bare bones. _Game Grumps_ had lost it’s newly loved co-host. Arin had lost who he thought just my be his possible future husband. 

He just broke, losing his footing half-way through a sentence, crumbling into tears. Barry had looked concerned, if not surprised. Before he could offer any support, Arin had forced his way past him,out to his car. He was sat in the driver's seat, but wasn’t going anywhere. 

————

Dan squints at the light, leaning against the same floor-to-ceiling windows outside of HALOS inc, smoking a cigarette with Brian, just like he had been the day before he got banished. It was like the worst déjà vu in the world. 

Since he had been back he’d also been attending work to keep his brain from focusing on Arin. Surprisingly, it seemed the trip downstairs had taught Dan a valuable lesson about the sophistication of human-kind and he was taking most wishes far more seriously and working off the information in the file. Although, maybe the rehabilitation had been too effective. The file seemed lacking. It didn’t list any really personal information. Nothing like their dreams, aspirations, insecurities or circumstances. It seemed all really arms-length and business-ney. Dan missed the personal connection and intimacy he had with Arin. How he got to see all sides of him, learn about his family, people he aspired to be like. His like and dislikes. It was the little things that were most important, though. Dan remembered Arin liked how Dan used to reach up to feed him chips when his hands were busy with a controller. Arin liked how Dan used his shampoo. Arin liked how Dan would randomly break out into song. Arin liked Dan. Arin loved Dan. Dan loved Arin. 

There he was again, unable to keep his mind off of him. 

As much as Dan tried, Arin was all he could properly focus on. Big, soft teddy. Mr Business. The Video Game boy. Arin was all of those and more, and it stung like nothing else to be separate from him. Dan couldn’t blame Arin for his reaction that day either. Arin was right calling Dan a liar and a user. He was a monster quite frankly, and since then Dan didn’t know if he deserved the wings. It seemed counter-intuitive to reward Dan with his wings and magic for breaking someone's heart, even if they were technically a ‘lesser’ species. 

“So…?” Brian broached the subject.

Dan looks towards him, “So what?”  
  


“How does it feel to be back?” He takes a short drag on the cigarette, “Do you feel any better? I’ve been avoiding the subject but…”  
  


Dan sighs loudly, dropping his head back, “Honestly, I want to kill myself.”  
  


“That’s not funny, Dan.” Brian warns him.

“Who said I was trying to be funny?” He exhales, watching the smoke waft away, “I can’t stop thinking about him. I miss him, Bri. I miss him and I don’t want to do anything but hug him, kiss him, apologise, tell him I’ll stay forever…but he doesn’t want me anymore, so here I am.”  


  
Brian nods, “Yeah…You know, I keep thinking about that day when you called me, crying, asking me what to do. I think that’s when I realised this was sort of a lost cause, but I never wanted to admit it.”  


“A lost cause?” Dan tilts his head quizzically, “Elaborate.”

“Yeah, like…” He huffs, attempting to string together words that would make sense, “I knew then that you really gave a shit, and probably didn’t want back into Heaven, but that was so hard to wrap my head around. No one’s ever not wanted back into Heaven. I wanted you back up here so badly, most of my advice was based around you completing your task, but you’d wrapped yourself up in an awkward position. You cared about him…”  
  
Dan sighs, “Well, I’ve fucked it up now anyway. So there’s no point discussing what might’ve happened if I didn’t get these motherfucker’s back.” He gestures to the wings on his back. 

Dan feels hopeless. The floor was falling out from underneath him. There was nothing left to cling onto. This was his reality now. He wasn’t on Earth anymore. 

When Dan was down there, he was homesick. He missed what he had before. He missed Brian, his family, his magic, his immortality. He felt like he was stuck, unable to escape. Trapped. Everything he did was in order to further his stupid task, so he never properly examined what he had right in front of him. Arin. He never properly thought about what he was leaving behind. Sure, that was all his mind was caught up with in his last month of being there, but he never properly _understood_ what he was doing. He knew he’d break Arin’s heart, burn him, but until he saw it he didn’t really get it. Now he got it, saw it, understood it, everything made sense. 

He was no hero. Love is no easy feat. An easy task by all Heaven’s accounts, but actually one of the most difficult, complex, underrated tasks in the history of forever. Dan should’ve got that already. He should’ve known what love does to you, but he never clocked it, too focused on something else. 

Heaven should’ve never undervalued something as important as love, human or not. The bitterness he felt towards himself only projected onto the realm around him. 

_Arin, I’m sorry._

————

“Arin.” She reached across the table to place her hand on his, “You’re hurting.”

Backtrack. 

The night after the heartbreak had hit Arin where it hurt, Arin just wanted someone to talk to. With no one left, he reached out to the only person he knew he could talk to. 

He messaged Suzy on _Instagram_. He expressed he needed to talk to her. It wasn’t anything concerning their divorce, or their relationship. He just needed an open ear, someone who knew him. Someone who got him. 

Suzy, being the wonderful human being she is, messaged back almost instantly, telling Arin no matter what, she’d be there for him. She’d day trip out to LA especially for him. Arin felt guilty, asking for something like that. To talk to his _old_ love about his _new_ love, but there was no one else he could call on. 

When Suzy arrived, Arin realised he no longer saw her romantically, and it proved Dan had repaired that hole in Arin’s heart but left behind one of his own.

She pulled him into a hug, it felt warm and familiar. Suzy didn’t press him immediately, instead, they just chatted about the general going-ons in life. Arin let Suzy drop her bags at his place, the place they used to share together, before they sat down in the kitchen. The kitchen had always been the place where they spoke. It was also the place where they broke up, but for now, neither one of them seemed uncomfortable. It looked like they had both moved on. Neither one harboured any bad blood or ulterior motives.

Arin raises an eyebrow, “Hurting?”  
  


Suzy nods, gently pushing her hair over her shoulder, “You’ve lost your sparkle.”   
  


“‘M not sure I had one to begin with.”  
  


She giggles softly, “Yes, you did. That’s what I was attracted to in the first place, dummy.”

Arin sips his coffee, “Whatever…”  


  
Suzy smiles softly, “What’s going on? What did you want to talk about?”  


  
“Um…”  


  
Suzy looks around like she just remembered something, “Is it Dan?”  


  
Hearing someone else say his name like that was so surreal. Especially Suzy.

“W-what?” He stammered. 

It was Dan, but how did Suzy know that?  
  
She leans forward. “Arin…we might not be married anymore, but that doesn’t mean I don’t check in on you occasionally. I still care about you. I know about Dan, I know about _Game Grumps._ Honestly, I was really pulling for you to find someone as great as you after Jon left. It felt like two blows to you, me then him. I was just glad Dan was so ready to take up the slack. I knew the first episode he was right for _GG._ ”

“Y-yeah. Me too.” Arin recalled the first day he met Dan. How as soon as Dan had sung about his erection, Arin knew he was made of the right material. “It was pretty instantaneous, huh?”

“People on the internet never like change, but I knew they’d accept him in no time at all.” Her eyes drift across his face, “What’s going on?”  
  


“We broke up.” Arin mumbles.

“What?” She exclaims, looking genuinely surprised, “That— What?”

“Why do you sound so surprised?”

“I just…he…” Suzy clears her throat, going quiet for a second, “He kinda seemed just right for you. I mean, I don’t know what it was like behind the scenes, but I know you, Arin. You can’t lie about how you feel. You sounded so happy during recording. At peace. It made me really happy in turn. I just can’t believe it would just end like that.” 

“I was the one who broke up with him.”  
  


“What? Arin!” 

Arin didn’t quite know how to word what came next. He couldn’t tell Suzy all about Dan being an angel. She might think he really went off the deep end. 

“He— uh. I found out he was…using me?” 

That didn’t sound right at all. It was the truth, that was exactly what Dan did, but it just sounded like a twisted truth. 

“Using you?” Suzy gets defensive, “Where is he? I’ll kill him!”   
  


Suzy still sounded so cute when she said it because Arin knew she never actually meant it. She was just caring for Arin as she had always done. 

“No…I…” He stumbles, puffing his cheeks out, “I mean…it’s complicated. Not in the way you might think. Not for fame or anything. I don’t think Dan ever really cared about the fame that came with _Game Grumps._ ” 

“So…what then?”  
  


“I can’t put it into words.”  
  


Suzy gets soft again, “But you…miss him…huh?”  
  


Arin nods, dropping his head forward, leaning against the island, “I miss him so badly, Suze.” 

Suzy pouts, “I can tell.”  
  


“Every time I think about him using me, it doesn’t ever feel that way, because of what we had between us when we were together. I was pissed when we broke up, when he claimed he really did love me, it just sounded like lies, but now…I believe him. I think he really did, but I was so hurt I just couldn’t process it.”   


“Have you spoken to him since?” Suzy asks, running her finger around the rim of her mug thoughtfully, “Maybe you two just needed the dust to settle? I hate to say it Arin. Again, I don’t really know what went down between you, maybe he was a total bully behind the scenes, but from what I saw, he seemed just right for you.”

“A bully?” Arin felt an intense need to clear Dan’s name, “No. He was never a bully. He was great. He took his time with me. He never pressed me. He understood me. He was just complicated. He was in a complicated position.” 

There it was. Arin suddenly understood Dan. He was in a complicated place. He had to decide between Arin or the whole life he had in Heaven. Arin wouldn’t have known what to do if he was in his place, either. He was in a lose-lose situation regardless of what he chose. The only bad move he made in the whole duration of his trip was that he was the object of affection, but Arin hadn’t made it any easier on him either. Arin recalled every instance where Dan had pointed out people who seemed like a good fit for him. The speed dating fiasco. Everything Dan had done that had failed. Arin had fallen for Dan, which in turn made Dan fall for Arin. Everything just ended up that way. Dan hadn’t made the conscious choice at that time. It’s just how the blocks fell. 

Suzy laughs softly. “So…um…why don’t you try talking to him again? If you were the one who broke up with him, it’s possible that he still wants to be with you.”  
  


Arin wanted to so badly, but for once, there was actually no way he could. 

“I can’t.”  


  
“Why not?”  


  
“I just can’t. It’s literally impossible.”

“Arin. If I know anything about you, nothing is impossible for you. You’re determined and strong-willed. If you think about it enough, the solution will probably just fall right into your lap.” 


	16. Is he Okay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin finds a familiar phone hidden in a drawer in Ross' stripped office. Cracking into it he's able to call Brian, but will Brian agree to take the call to Dan?   
> Meanwhile, Dan's still dealing with the heart-break, spiralling into a miserable cycle of depression, wondering if he broke his own heart worse than he broke Arin's.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been a little while again. but I finally finished my university interviews! Ah, what a nightmare. Anyway, here ya go! This has been sitting in my documents for like two weeks now!

——————

Dan tears through the night sky, tears streaming down his cheeks, falling from his chin into the world below him. 

He had been okay for the first weeks, almost feelingness, just understandably upset with himself for causing heartbreak. Fucking everything up similarly to how he always did, always would. However, as of late, something else had come up. He hadn’t only broken Arin’s heart, he had broken his own. 

Every day, waking up alone in Heaven felt nothing like the bliss he would usually experience. He would’ve stayed on Earth. He would’ve if Arin had asked, but with Arin no longer wanting him, Dan was left to fend for himself. 

He wondered if the feeling would ever pass. It never quite had with Erin. Never really. He just fell into a cycle of sex and alcohol. Dan couldn’t even bear to think of that happening again. He didn’t think it could either. Not after Arin. 

He sucks in the cold night air through clenched teeth, flying higher into the sky to get away from any other angels. He just wanted to be alone. That’s all he deserved. 

Listlessly, he flew for some more time until he could feel his wings getting tired. Even then, he didn’t want to land. If he could fly longer on these worthless wings, perhaps they may fall off, and he could be sent plummeting back to the Earth. He looked to the moon, whispering softly, “Won’t you cry for me? You’re just as lonely as me.” 

Sure, Dan had friends up here. Hell, he had his family, Brian, a few others…but he still felt lonely. He hadn’t even had the heart to go and see his family since he got back. He’d stopped attending work a few days back when his heart just couldn’t bear the strain. 

——————

Arin wanders into Ross’ office once coming back to work. It didn’t feel right to see it all empty. 

After he had spoken to Suzy, he was feeling a little better, but he still missed Dan. He still wanted him back. Suzy was right…they needed the dust to settle. They needed time. He and Dan needed time. As far as he was concerned they still belonged together. Dan wouldn’t have lied had he not needed to. Arin already knew that. 

Arin huffs, sorting through a few of the empty drawers at the desk until something stared back at him from inside one of them. There sat…a phone? 

Arin recognised it immediately. That’s the phone he found behind the toilet. That’s the phone he broke into that night. That’s the phone Dan was contacting Brian on. 

He gently reaches forward, taking it like it could break if he handles it too roughly. Why was it here? Did Ross leave this behind on purpose? Ross had to come back to clean his office out, he wouldn’t leave it behind by mistake.   
  
He tapped the screen, and it lights up to his touch, fully charged. Arin can barely stop the gasp from leaving his lips. The face ID recognises Arin’s face and immediately unlocks to the home screen. 

“What the hell?” Arin mumbles. 

He was sure the last time he had to use Dan’s face to even get into it. Ross, that crafty bastard, he predicted this! 

Arin slinks to the door of Ross’ office, closing it should anyone look in. Carefully, he presses his back to it and starts going through the phone. In the contacts, there were now two names. Brian and Ross. 

Arin can’t decide what to do, for now, so he just goes to look back through Dan and Brian’s text chat like he did when he last had the phone. Though now he saw more texts he was blind to the last time he looked. 

**Dan:** Arin’s so cute sometimes.

**Brian:**??? Did he do smth cute?

**Dan:** No…he just is. He’s just cute. 

**Brian:** Gross, Dan.

Arin smiles weakly. Goddamn it, this was like torture.

He came back across that picture of Dan and Brian at the school gate. It was like a stab in the gut to see Dan again, even in image form. His smile was so familiar, but it felt like years since Arin had last seen it. He wondered if Dan was smiling in Heaven now. He wondered if Dan had gotten over it. What if he had, and Arin was the only one feeling like he made a mistake? 

Arin spends some more time reading into the texts, before walking out of the office into the cool night air, staring up at the moon. Is the moon the same in Heaven? Would they be looking at the same moon? Maybe. Arin knew nothing about Heaven. The laws, the customs. He wishes he could see it, just once. See where Dan grew up. Where he lived for most of his life. Was it really all that much better than Earth? So different? 

Desperation grew in Arin’s soul, calling out and yearning for some contact. He just wanted to go home and see Dan there. He gives in, pulling the phone out, looking at Brian’s contact. He hesitates a little before pressing the call button, holding the phone to his ear. 

It rings for an uncomfortable amount of time. Would anyone even pick up anymore?

———

Brian stares at the ringing phone on his nightstand in disbelief. The caller ID still said ‘Dan’, but he knew for a fact Dan didn’t have the phone, so was Ross calling? Brian didn’t even know why he still had the phone, now Dan was back, there was no reason for him to keep it anymore, but there it was, still on his nightstand. 

He wasn’t sure he really wanted to talk to Ross, but what if it was important?

After a little he picks it up, lighting a cigarette as he begins to speak, “Ross?”

“Uh…” A voice Brian doesn’t recognise rattles down the line, “Not quite.” 

Brian pauses, “Who is this?”  


  
“Who—?…Uh…My name is Arin Hanson.” 

“Arin?” Brian could hear the surprise in his own voice, “Arin? Seriously? What are…how do…” He takes a moment to get his shit together, “How did you get this number?”

“I…I think maybe Ross might’ve left this phone behind for me to find. It was tucked away in one of his drawers, but the rest of the office is completely empty.”

“Ross did?” 

“I think so…?” Arin mumbles, “I…Look, I know calling out of the blue like this is really weird. I’m sure you heard what went down through Dan but…Brian? You’re Brian, right?”

  
“Yeah?"

“How is he? Is he okay?”  
  


Brian picks at the skin around his thumb, flexing his wings uncomfortably, “Uh…He was coming to work when he got back.” Brian doesn’t know if he should continue speaking, but something within him compelled him to, “But recently I think all of this might’ve caught up with him. I haven’t seen him for days.” 

Arin’s quiet for a moment, “Brian. I know I don’t know you, I know we’re not friends but I have to tell you. I think I made the biggest mistake of my life.”

“I think Dan might feel the same.”   
  


“I feel stupid asking but is there any way I could talk to him? Is there any way you could get the phone to him?”

“Arin…he’s in a really delicate place right now. Me even talking to you is a huge violation of the rules. If I’m caught with this phone, or him, we could be up for major punishment. I’m not even talking Earth, I’m talking worse. We’re not supposed to talk to humans, you’re not even supposed to know we exist. This is dangerous.”  


  
Arin bites his lip, “I’m sorry. I’m sure I’m being selfish by asking. I’m still trying to wrap my head around all this, but with every passing day it feels like I’m losing every piece of his existence and I don’t know if I can handle 

it anymore. I just want to hear his voice. Please. I’m so sorry, but please, please consider it.”  
  


“Alright, Arin. I’ll consider it, but no promises."  
  


“Yeah…thank you. I’ll keep this phone by me, just in case. If you can’t do it, at least… uh, at least look after him. I know now what a compromising position he must’ve been in.” Arin’s voice wavers, “I just wish I had realised it sooner, while there was a chance I could’ve saved our relationship. You have no idea how lost I feel. I’m bound to the ground. If he were a human this would be so much easier."  
  


“I guess that’s the decision you made.” Brian sighs, “I’ll let you know. Bye, Arin.”  
  


“Bye.”   


  
The line goes dead and Brian is left holding the special phone, chewing at the inside of his cheek as he debates with what to do.

—————

Dan has been staring into his cup of coffee for the last twenty minutes. Maybe it was cold by now. Every time he drunk a cup of it, it just made him think back to his time on Earth. Though, so did everything. Everything he did just reminded him of what he was missing. Taking a shower? He’d do that with Arin. Watching TV? There were so many unfinished series he and Arin had been watching. There was nothing that didn’t include Arin. Maybe Heaven was too similar to Earth, but at the same time, they weren’t similar at all, kinda like the two of them. 

He lets out an exasperated cry, dropping his head back. He dumps the coffee into the sink, too upset to even drink it. This had never happened with Erin. He could still drink coffee after Erin, he just had to add a shot of something or other to the mixture. Dan’s tastebuds had died. Nothing tasted like anything. It was just sustenance, enough to keep him alive for now. However, his fridge was now as empty as his soul, but Dan couldn’t bring himself to venture out of his apartment, except to fly alone. He’d rather wither away and die in his own filth than get changed and set out back into society again, even if was just to go shopping. How pathetic, he felt like a twelve-year-old two-thousand-and-eight emo kid on a downer.

There was a knock at the door, but Dan ignored it. He’d ignored everything external since his heart fell apart in his chest. Another knock, someone was calling his name. He recognised the voice, but it was grainy like it was going through interference. He squinted at the floor as if it might help him hear better. 

The carpet. It was so boring. He’d become so familiar with it, having paced through his apartment over again. He’s surprised he hasn’t worn a rut into the floor. 

“Dan!”

  
There it was. His name again. 

_Bang, bang, bang._

“Are you alive in there? If you don’t let me in I’m going to call the overseers!” 

The overseers. The Heaven equivalent of human police, but worse. 

Dan hisses. He doesn’t want to deal with that if he could avoid it.

He makes his way to the door, pulling it open, wincing and shying away from the bright light of the corridor outside, having drawn the curtains to his own apartment days ago. He wasn’t even sure what time of day it was anymore, or what day it was. He didn’t care.

“Damn! What the hell has happened to you?” Brian stands there, looking genuinely shocked at the state of his best friend. 

Dan has no reaction, turning away and shambling back into the apartment, leaving the door open should Brian want to come in. 

Brian rushes inside, closing the door behind him, immediately pulling open a multitude of curtains in Dan’s bachelor pad. Dan gasps, covering his eyes, “What the hell are you doing?”  


  
“Getting you your life back!” Brian scowls, “You’re a wreck.”  


  
“Oh, you picked up on that?” Dan mutters sarcastically, “What incredible deductive skills.”  


“This isn’t you.” Brian follows Dan into the kitchen, where he hides from the light, “This is a monster.”  


  
“I _am_ a monster. I’m the worst, Brian."  


  
“I don’t think so.”

“Well no offence or anything, Bri, but it doesn’t really matter what you think.” 

That stings, but Brian knew Dan wasn’t in his right state of mind.   


  
“Neither does Arin.”  


  
Dan freezes, his voice dropping a couple of octaves angrily, “What did you just say to me?”  


  
“Neither. Does. Arin.”   


  
“Arin _hates_ me, Brian! When will you get it? He told me he doesn’t want me. He never wants to hear about me again, never hear anyone say my name again. I could die for all he cares. God! How many times do I have to say the same thing?” 

Brian smiles easily, lifting the phone to his ear, “D’ya get that, Arin?”

  
Dan pauses, looking between Brian and the phone, “Wha—“  


  
Brian holds his finger up to signify he’s talking like Dan was just a loud child, “I don’t think he’s in any mood to talk right now.”  


  
“Give me that!” Dan swipes the phone from Brian’s hand, “Arin?”  


  
“Hey, Dan…” 


	17. The Wish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arin and Dan share, what they assume to be, their last ever conversation over the phone. 
> 
> Feeling a little better having spoken to Dan, Arin records a solo Game Grumps but knows he'd have to address Dan missing sooner or later. Caught up in looking at Dan's pictures on his phone, he makes a wish which gives Dan's life clarity in Heaven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup! So here's the latest chapter. I hope it doesn't feel as if I'm dragging this thing on, but it's almost over, the next few chapters will wrap up the closing of this tale. 
> 
> Thank you for all your support, as usual, it means the world to me!  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter <3

————

The conversation went on for what seemed like a fortunate forever. 

Hearing Arin’s voice seemed like seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. They spoke about everything that wasn’t the situation they were in right now. Everything but how far apart they were. Everything but the trial. It felt like everything that had happened would come crashing back in on them again if they did. Reveal all the scorched earth between them. 

Dan drinks in every little giggle Arin made, however uncomfortable he sounded. It almost made Dan feel whole again. It also made him feel like the wings on his back were not there anymore. He felt human again, and it was the most freeing thing Dan had experienced in a while. Clearly, the love was still there in full force, full throttle. 

“Arin.” Dan interrupts Arin talking about a game they had played on the channel a month or so ago, “I love you.”  
  


There is a cool silence between them for a moment. 

“I love you, too.”  
  


Dan’s heart soars higher than his wings could ever carry him. 

“I miss you.”  
  


“I miss you more.” Arin sighs, “I guess. I guess…um…we should really talk about what happened, what’s happened since then.” Arin clears his throat as if he could almost see Dan nod, “I can hardly believe what I saw, who you are, what we went through, but most of all I can’t believe what I said to you.”  
  


“It’s okay, Arin. I understand why you said what you did, you had every right to be angry with me. I did use you, I just did it in the worst way and for the most selfish reason possible. I knew as soon as it happened I would end up backtracking on every fucking bit of healing I had done to you. I kind of hoped my bad luck would never catch up to me and you wouldn’t tell me you loved me until it was too late. Though, for some reason, I kept working towards Heaven.”

“I keep thinking about it, about your catch-twenty-two. You had no cards left. If I was in your position, would I have made many different choices? Like, if I was in love with me, but my whole life was worlds away, and all I had was me, would I give it all up for that? You were willing to, weren’t you? But I rejected you.”  


“Yeah.” Dan laughs sheepishly, “You seriously shot me down hardcore, bro.”  


Arin matches his laugh, “Guess I did. What difference does it make if I regret the decision I made now, though? You’re where you are and I’m where I am. Hey, if I kill myself do I come up to Heaven like it says I do in the bible?”

“Don’t joke about that…and the bible is a fucking joke, man.” Dan sighs, “But yeah, you would, but it wouldn’t make any difference. Think of Heaven like a skyscraper. The souls of the redeemed and the pearly gates are the ground floor, the angels like me occupy the penthouse at the top. We’re levels apart. I wouldn’t even be able to come see you, you’re technically way below my pay grade. Angels who deal with passed human souls are essentially glorified au pairs. I don’t want you to kill yourself, anyway. It would be a waste, and the world needs your light. You’re so special, Arin. I never thought one man would be able to change my view of humans single-handedly, without even trying.”

Arin sighs, “So…that’s it, huh? This phone call is goodbye?”  
  


Dan stays silent, “I don’t know.”  


  
“I can’t live with that, Dan. The ripples you made down here are all around me, threatening to turn into a tsunami. The channel. All the people who know about our relationship. All of your shit is still at my apartment. Everyone asking about you and Ross. I don’t know how to respond or cope.”

“Can you change your mind? Can you go back to hating me?”  


  
“I tried that…It didn’t work.” Arin laughs sadly. 

Dan sighs, “I’m still willing, you know?”  


  
“What?”  


  
“My wings. I’m still willing to give them up, if you’ll have me.”  


  
“What?” Arin exclaims, “Are you crazy? No way! I’m not letting you do that.”  


  
“Are you seriously shooting me down yet again? That’s cold, man.”  
  


“Wh—no! That’s not what I mean, I just…everything you have, everyone you know.”  
  


“I feel like they’d understand.” Dan looks out the window,“I’ve never cared about something or someone so much to sacrifice myself and my life for it. I think you are that ‘it’, Arin. I’d give up everything for you. I knew that even before I got the chance for my wings back.” 

Arin sighs loudly, “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want you back. It’s kinda cruel, huh? How the cookie crumbles.”

“A crumbled cookie is still a cookie, though.” Dan muses, “It’s still just as tasty, especially if I eat it off your chest.”  


  
Arin devolves into a laughing fit, “Dan! Fuckin—Jesus.”  


  
“Hey. What happened to you? You were the one who made all the comments about ‘absolutely annihilating’ my ass.”

“What happened to me? You happened to me.”

Dan smiles softly, “You happened to me too.” 

————

The conversation ended when neither one of them had anything left to say. Both Dan and Arin neglected to bring up what might happen after they put the phone down, and neither of them wanted to pick it up again. Dan wasn’t one for long-distance and for Arin, it was just too painful to think that the only contact he could share with Dan was through a crackly phone line. 

While Arin was still amped up on the energy, he had recorded an episode of solo _Game Grumps_ and sent it off to be edited, but it was rough thinking back on it. He hadn’t mentioned where Dan was, or when he was scheduled back, so he knew that’s what all the comments would be about. 

Tonight, he scrolls through pictures on his phone, looking at the ones he had with Dan. The way Dan’s smile resonated within Arin sent chills down his spine. It was like falling into a flashback. 

A picture of Dan leant against Arin halfway through a team meeting that someone had taken as soon as a staff member noticed how close they always were, sits in front of him. Arin had asked her in secret to send it over to his phone, with the intention of setting it as his lock screen, which he never got around to. Now seemed as good a time as any. It brought back good memories, however bitter-sweet. 

At this moment, he wishes for Dan back.

* * *

_“You and Dan are all over each other!” The staff member giggled, “I think the fangirls eat that up.”  
_

_  
“Correction, Dan is all over me.” Arin puffed his chest up, “He can’t get enough.”  
_

_  
“Don’t pretend we can’t all see you through the window to the Grumps room, Arin. We see you biting at his neck when you pass the controller off to him to play.”  
_

_  
“That’s to throw him off.” Arin smiled fondly._

_It was true to a degree, but Arin would adore how Dan would bite back laughs and struggle to keep focused, just making him appear bad at the game, which he would always blame on his ‘deformed’ thumbs._

_Arin had bruised Dan’s skin a couple of times with his teeth and Dan would call him a vampire, but it was always sweet. It seemed with each passing day Daniel Avidan became clearer and Danny Sexbang became a persona._

_Daniel Avidan was a sweetheart. He’d light up the room with his presence whether he meant to or not, but had a rock hard resolve. He always tried his best and it made Arin’s heart swell. Danny Sexbang was a God among humans and his cocky gaze made_ **_another_ ** _part of Arin swell._

_He loved both sides._

_* * *_

Dan returns to work the next day, working off the temporary energy Arin had gifted to him, but the cold office air dries his tongue. He has a rolling headache and a sick feeling.

Yesterday, after he had put the phone down, it felt like that was the last he’d ever hear of Arin. Arin wouldn’t want him to give up his wings or his life. It was unspoken between them, that phone call was goodbye.

A girl looks back at Dan from her cubicle, “Hey… Dan, I gotta take an early lunch, I’m dying in here! I’m partway through granting this wish, but every time I try to clear it I get an error message. Can you try to do it? I think if you can make this work it might get you back on the CEO’s good side.”  


  
“Sure, Ariel. Send it through to my screen.”  


  
She gives him a thumbs up and gets up to go for lunch once she sends it through. 

Dan hopes this wouldn’t be too complicated and she was doing something wrong, because, with all the ‘sick’ days he just pulled without calling in, the CEO had been testy with him. Even with how well Dan was doing now. 

Dan pulls up the wish and the file, the colour draining out of his face as soon as he sees the picture of the man on his screen. 

_**Wish ID:** #4790907654667_

_**Name:** Arin Joseph Hanson_

_**D. O. B:** January 6th, 1987 (Capricorn)_

_**Status After Death:** Heaven-Bound_

_**Relationship Status:** Single (In love)_

_**Wish:** “For my love to return to me.” _

_**We have evaluated this person(s) as a possible wish worthy candidate. Please carefully evaluate the remainder of this file and make the appropriate decision regarding this wish at your discretion.** _

Dan feels a pit grow at the bottom of his stomach, reeling, feeling heady and nauseous. He clutches a hand to his mouth. 

It never occurred to him that this may happen, having already resigned to a life without Arin as he deserved. It became very clear why Ariel was getting an error message every time she attempted to submit the wish. The Heaven system was failsafe, the only way it would ever fault was if there was a reason the wish was unable to come to fruition. For example, your love living on a different plane to your own. 

With shaky fingers, Dan began to watch the live-feed of Arin that was taken of the moment of the wish being made.

There Arin was on his sofa, scrolling through pictures of the two of them. Thank the big-G that Ariel hadn’t realised who that was in the pictures with Arin. 

“Fuck…”

Brian glances over from his work station, “Dan?” He leans over to peer at Dan’s screen, also looking shocked, “He really—?”  
  


Dan can’t tear his eyes from the screen, “Why couldn’t he wish to forget me? Why this?” Arin looked so crestfallen and Dan wanted to just get in the car like he always did and drive over. He could go through the route in his memory. Each road. Each traffic light. Each highway. “Brian—” 

Brian raises an eyebrow, “You…what are you going to do? You have to bring this to the CEO. If you decline because of an error message it’ll be sent through to Angel Resources.”  
  


Dan tuns Brian out. It’s true, he had to take it to the CEO…but…

He saw it gleaming in front of him. His ticket. 

He’d been so blind. If there were ever a worthy reason to give up his wings it would be this. 

Dan huffs, scribbling down the wish ID on a note pad and tearing it from the rest of them, marching his ass to the elevator to show the CEO his quandary.   


Whilst in the elevator, Dan evaluates his possible routes. He was suddenly at a fork in the road, as if he was in the middle of a spider web and two strands stretched out before him.

He fiddles with the edge of the paper so it began to fray and dull. His hands shake in anticipation. Is he really about to offer what he was? It’d been so long without Arin maybe he wasn’t thinking straight? 

“C’mon. C’mon, Avidan. Be a man! You gotta make a decision at some point. You can’t just…keep…feeling sorry for yourself!” 

The lift doors slide open to reveal the waiting room for the CEO’s office, and Dan hobbles uneasily to the secretaries desk. “Stacey…I need to see the CEO.”  
  


She files her nails, not looking up for a second, “He’s in a meeting at the moment, Mr Avidan.”  
  


He slams his palms down on the desk, shocking her and almost him too, gritting his teeth, “I _need_ to see him, Stacey. It’s important.”  
  


She stares at him incredulously, “What the Heavens, Dan?”  
  


“I need to see him.” He repeats it a second time, “I don’t want to, I _need_ to.”  
  


“Okay…Jeez! You don’t gotta be so pushy.” She sits up, gesturing for Dan to go sit down, calling through to the CEO’s office on her phone. “He’ll be 10 minutes.”  
  


Dan nods, rocking in his seat as if he were in trouble. He keeps running his finger along the edge of the note he had, he was sure when he looked down later he’d have a multitude of paper cuts, but that didn’t matter right now. He was going to do it. He has to do it. 

_______  
  
Ten minutes later, Dan sits in front of the CEO, sliding the wish ID across to him. “There’s an error with this wish.”  
  


The CEO raises an eyebrow in disbelief, “That’s not possible.”

“Actually, it’s entirely possible.” He says, breathing out a shaky breath, “I suggest you take a look.”

The CEO falters for a second, before sighing, taking the note and typing the ID into his computer, “Avidan, if I look and see no problem with this wish you are going to be in so much trouble, you just wait and—” He goes quiet as he looks over the file, “Wh—This…?”  
  
Dan nods to confirm to the CEO that what he was seeing was correct. 

“And I can’t deny it without it pinging on Angel Resources system, especially with the eyes they’re keeping on me at the moment. Arin is a prime candidate for wish-granting according to the file, and though its a big ask, his karma is not in a bad place and he has not asked for much for a while.” 

The CEO looks stupefied like he never expected anything like this to happen. “Well…there’s no way granting this wish is possible. I’ll have to write a special pardon for this denial to Angel Resources.”   
  


Dan sucks in a breath to cool himself down. “Actually. There is one way you could grant this wish.”


	18. Death of an Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After hearing Arin's wish, Dan's solution is very simple; he wants back down on Earth and has to go through the steps to get there. Though painful and final, Dan's willing to do anything for Arin, at this point, feeling as if Arin's love is all he has left. He's bored of being trapped somewhere, depressed and his choices are limited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So it's been ages! Like really, really ages, so I'm not sure whether anyone's still interested in this story. This chapter has been sitting on my desktop for weeks. I couldn't figure out if the ending was good enough, maybe I'll revisit it at some point, but for now, I just want to post this. 
> 
> Enjoy <3
> 
> \----------

It had been a few days since Arin had seen that solo episode of _Grumps_ was posted. Still, comments were coming in along the lines of Dan’s whereabouts.

He kept the hoodie Dan had left around his. Sometimes he even wore it, even if it was a little tight, there was something comforting about knowing Dan’s presence hadn’t just been a dream. He often caught sight of himself wearing it and wondered if that made him seem like an even bigger loser than he felt. This wasn’t him. Acting like a heartbroken-teenager wasn’t in his nature at all, but here he was. 

Arin is in a slump for a second time in a matter of months from a relationship that there was no way to even rebuild. He had been attempting to drag himself up from the couch for a few hours now at least. No attempt had worked effectively. Something nondescript is on the TV, but Arin can’t focus. It’s not anything he wants to watch. What he wanted to watch were the half-finished seasons he and Dan were watching, and now it seems worthless and cruel to watch them without him. Like a betrayal.

Sometimes Arin would get angry. Cursing the universe that coerced him into falling for an angel. Now Arin knew why Dan always had that great energy. He was an angel after all. Who wouldn’t fall for an angel like that? 

“Ssshit—“ Arin hissed, forcing himself to sorta roll over onto his side, slipping down into the pillows, closing his eyes.

“Arin.” 

Arin tenses up, tilting his head, opening his eyes to check for what that was. No one. He tries to dismiss it, like it is the house settling, but it was most certainly someone’s voice. He purses his lips, dropping his head back and letting his eyes slide closed again, then he opened them once more to take a drowsy glance at the ceiling only to see someone standing over him. 

“Arin.” 

The figure was so close, Arin could almost feel the brush of their wild curls against his cheek, their breath breezing his face. A familiar smile greets him in the light of the TV. Was…was Arin dreaming?

“Ngh—?” Arin mumbles, trying to move forward, but he’s stuck, paralysed…and just…so tired…

“Don’t move. Don’t say anything.” They attempt to soothe him, “I’m not here right now anyway, you’ll just be disappointed.” They laugh airily, “You’re asleep. Just…hang on, okay? Leave the rest to me. You’ve done your part… I love you, Idiot.” 

———

Dan puffs his cheeks out, staring at the back of an overseer who’s watching the door to the enchanted cell he’s in. 

To make a long story short, the higher-ups were afraid Dan might do something reckless if he was left alone, so they had put him in a cell while they considered his out-of-this-world request, or means to an end of a problem. 

Dan’s solution to Arin’s wish problem was as simple as the following: Take his wings. 

Dan has surmised that if he was just going to be as unhappy as he was in Heaven without Arin, then this wasn’t Heaven at all. At least, not for him. Dan remembers his feelings toward Heaven before the whole stint with Arin. The feelings of unworthiness. The feeling of being a black sheep. He almost hated the clean, immaculate nature of Heaven. The lack of a flaw. The lack of individuality. Everyone seemed the same in some way or another. 

The only problem with Dan’s request for his wings to be taken was that his angel status would be taken from him as well. He would no longer be a supernatural being of any kind. Just a human, a mortal with an expiry date like the rest of them. He’d be leaving behind everything he’d grown up with and back down on earth, to carve out a totally new story, already a good chunk through his life. It would be tough, this would be his actual life, not just a brief task period. There would be no second chance. No chance to rethink things, but Dan’s hope was that with Arin, perhaps it wouldn’t be so difficult.

Additionally, maybe it wouldn’t work out between him and Arin? Their time together was so short, and you can never predict the end, but Dan had a feeling that regardless of what way their relationship turned out, he’d be grateful for the experience. Who’d want to live forever anyway if you can’t experience everything there is to experience? Inclusive of dating someone on a completely different plane to you. Dan already had a great love that left him behind, and he wasn’t about to do the same to Arin. This time he had to make his own choices. Be his own hero. 

The overseer looks over his shoulder, “Avidan. You have a visitor.”  
  
———

Dan runs his finger along the rim of the coffee Brian brought him.

Brian looks stressed out, but smiles at Dan warmly, “So…you’re still sure this is what you want?”  
  


“Yes, Bri.” Dan sighs softly, “But I can barely meet your eyes, I feel so guilty leaving you behind like this.”   
  


“Don’t feel bad, Dan.” He grins, “I’ve never seen you be so certain about something. I just don’t know why they have you locked up like this. I mean, I get it, you’re the only angel in the history of…well, forever, that regained their angel status, just to want out of the game. The CEO had to get an audience with the big guy to discuss what to do with you.”  
  


“I just want to grant his wish, Bri. If I can do something for him from where I am, then fine. He wants his love back, and that’s me…I think. However much he loves going to McDonald’s at three AM, I think I’m worth more than a couple of cold fries at least.” Dan giggles.   
  


“You are to me. You’re my best friend.” 

“Ahh! Don’t make this harder than it has to be, I’m already struggling with the prospect of having my wings torn from my back.”  
  


“Yeah. I keep trying to block that part out.”  


  
One of the consequences relating to Dan giving up his angel status, for real, was the removal of wings from his back…permanently. Dan hadn’t experienced this when he was first banished as they were only in suspension. This time he’d be losing them forever. This included having them cut from his back with some kind of special sword. Reading about the ritual had been difficult, to say the least. The books labelling it the ‘ultimate pain’, like some kind of torture. No one had ever gone through it willingly, it had been for the worst offender angels only. Those who Heaven wished to banish for good, never to return. Though, here Dan was, putting his hand up for it. 

Dan sighs again, louder this time, “Me too.”  


  
Brian pauses, “Oh! I did your favour.”   


  
Dan had asked Brian to do something for him before he got carted off to his holding cell. One of the sister branches of the Department of Wishes was the Department of Dreams. Dan had wanted to make sure Arin knew to wait. Dan also knew a chick was crushing on Brian who worked there, so figured Brian could probably wangle a favour from her if he asked correctly. Getting through to Arin through his dreams was the best Dan could do right now, so it was his ideal option. 

He just wanted Arin to know to wait, just hold on for a bit longer while he figured out how to get back to him. 

Dan grins, “Thanks…” He glances to Brian for a second, “Whatever happens, Brian. Just know, you’ll always be my best friend.”   
  
———

The following days passed in a monotonous flash. Dan had been given little to no information on the proceedings of his case.

However, unexpectedly, this morning he's awakened by one of the overseers unlocking his cage, coming in to grab him by the arm and tug him down a maze of different hallways. 

Dan never quite understood why he was locked up in a cage-like prison. Sure, they wanted to keep him from doing anything rash, but surely there were better more humane ways to do something like that. House arrest, at least. Then again, what was the point of being ‘humane’ in Heaven? They’re not human. 

Dan approaches a door he knew all too well. A door that might as well have all his bed feelings thumb-tacked onto the front of it. The black ornate door, through which his last trial took place. 

Dan is thrown through the opening by the overseer who was dragging him and lands roughly on his knees in the middle of the floor.   


  
Although he knew how this worked already, he still flinches when the spotlight above him comes on with a bang and the rest of the panel come into full-view. A familiar figure made of all bright white light sits in the middle of the panel again. The CEO to his left, the rest of the seats left empty. 

“Leigh Daniel Avidan, I have to admit, I hadn’t thought I’d be seeing you so soon again.”  


  
“Me, neither.” Dan squints, the beam of the spotlight made his eyes burn, “But I’ve learnt to expect the unexpected.”  


  
“Indeed.” The figure continues, “Your employer informed me of your rather peculiar predicament and your equally as curious solution to it.”  


  
Dan bites his bottom lip, nodding, “I see.”  


  
“You do understand that an error in wish-granting can be overridden if expressed permission is sent through from your employer to angel resources? It’s unnecessary for you to offer up your place in Heaven for a wish to be granted. In fact, I’d venture to say even, that it’s a step too far, as you’ve just gotten your place back.”  


  
Dan nods. rocking on his heels, almost feeling like he’s being scolded by a teacher. “Did my Boss tell you about who’s wish that was?”

“A mister Arin Hanson, yes? The poor human specimen who denounced you at the last trial?”  


  
“There have been changes in his feelings toward me clearly, due to the nature of that wish…” Dan continues.

“So…you’re willing to give up everything you have up here to be…demoted, essentially.”  


  
“I don’t see it that way, sir. But if we’re speaking formally, yes, I suppose I am.”  


  
“Do you mind if I ask why?”  


  
“Uh…” Dan tilts his head, “Love. As, uh, ‘lame' as it sounds. I dunno. Other reasons too. Quite frankly, if I can speak out of term, Heaven is a far cry from my personal Heaven. And if this love doesn’t work out, it still 

doesn’t matter to me. I want to make my Heaven, on Earth. I feel like…I have the luxury of choice down there. Clean slate. Start fresh. All that good stuff.”  


  
Dan felt stupid. He didn’t quite know how else to put what he just said more formally, but it was getting tiring to explain himself and his reasoning. Of course, there was a means for it, but he’d gone over it himself a million times, and then a couple more million to Brian. He couldn’t back out now anyway. He was already halfway down the track. 

There’s a short silence up at the panel.

“You do understand the pain you will undergo with the removal of your wings?”  


  
“I do, and at least it will be quick. I wish there were another way to go about this, but rules are rules, I guess.”

“This is your last chance to move back on your decision. Once I bang this gavel, your fate is sealed.”

Dan felt his throat dry up. It all seemed suddenly very final. Anyone’s last resort, but not for Dan. If he was going to do it, he had to do it now. Do it. Just do it. Say the words. Just say it. Say it! Say it, say it! 

“I want…” He coughs, willing saliva to come back to his mouth, “I want to… proceed.”

Another short silence follows, and Dan watches as the figure of light lifts his gavel. In slow motion the gavel drops and the bang erupts around Dan like thunder, echoing off into the distance. The world around him fades to black, and he’s left standing on the small circle of the floor that the spotlight had lit. 

Dan feels his stomach drop. He’d done it. He’d said it.   


  
The ‘judge’ appears beside him, “Leigh. Your status as an angel has been officially revoked. You will no longer be allowed access to Heaven, or contact. When you die, if Heaven-bound, you will be graded and treated as a mortal, and will be kept on the human level. Your clearance to your previous standing will not, nor ever be reinstated. Do you understand?”  


  
Dan nods. In the judge's hand a large, sharp-looking sword manifests. It looks more decorative than anything. It shone with an ethereal light that dazzled Dan. 

The judge continues, “Please turn and face away from me.”

Dan does as he’s told, taking a few deep breaths, trying to get a handle on what he was about to experience. Trying to conjure up the most physical pain he’d felt in his life so far, hoping maybe it’d liken to something similar to that. The ‘ultimate pain’ though, it must be something indescribable. Something that shocks you to your core. The most unimaginable experience to ever go through.  


He was not prepared. 

The sound of the sword slicing through the air is the last thing he hears before pain rips through his body. electric fizzling up and coating each individual vertebrae of his spine, one after the other. His hearing fades out and is replaced with an unrelenting ringing. Tears well up across his water-line as he feels himself drop to his knees, letting out an agonised cry. He feels his consciousness begin to fade in and out at the pain, feeling like he’d been hit in the back of the head with the full force a sledge-hammer. 

Then…then…then? Nothing. His body seemed to fade away like dust in the wind. He was just a consciousness in a vacant limbo. It seemed as if he were the only one in the universe for a while. What. Came. Next? 

———

Arin had somehow gotten himself into bed last night. He didn’t remember how, or when, but he did. 

He stares at the cupboard across from where he is laying, eyes still crusted with sleep. He wanted to roll over and go back to sleep, and that was his plan. However, upon rolling over he was greeted by…a back? 

Arin pauses, processing this in his sleepy haze before yelping, sitting up as straight as a rod and shoving himself out of bed, landing roughly on the floor and backing himself up against the cupboard. 

“What the fuck?” He gasps. They definitely weren’t there last night. Arin panics, looking over their bare back. There were two grizzly scars there, an equal distance apart. Still red and angry. 

Arin couldn’t focus on that right now, who the fuck was this, in his bed? He didn’t recognise those scars.  


  
After a fair bit of protesting to himself, from himself, against his better judgment he slid his phone from his bedside, readying 911 on the keypad, should he need it. Carefully, he stands up and rounds the bed so he could get a look at their face. 

Arin almost drops the phone as soon as he recognises their face, their hair, their build. A face he’d never thought he’d see again. A face he was so sure would have to live on purely in his memories. 

“Wh—” He can’t even piece together a full word, just staring at the sleeping man in his bed. 

This was Dan, right? He isn’t dreaming? 


	19. Finale

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan and Arin are back together, at last. Finally, their all-over-the-place love story comes to a comfortable end.
> 
> However, Arin still suffers somewhat from the emotional unrest he'd been feeling for weeks on end because of the relationship, making him clingy and uncomfortable about leaving Dan alone for extended periods of time. Despite Dan reassuring him that he's never going anywhere again, Arin needs a special kind of assurance to make sure Dan's bound to him eternally.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the end! Wow, when I started this fic I never envisioned it being this long, but as I have a knack for longer works of fiction, I'm not super surprised either. 
> 
> There were multiple endings to this story. Some of them a little angsty, but I didn't want to do that to my dear readers, so I just settled for a little bit of fluffy goodness. 
> 
> If you've read the whole way through, thank you so much for your time. I hope it's been enjoyable. 
> 
> In the hope of keeping the egobang ship alive, I'm sure this won't be the last fic I ever post on here! But for now, Streamyyy, over and out! x
> 
> _____________

“D-Dan?” Arin mutters, bending at the waist, taking a look at the sleeping man. 

There was no mistaking it. Dan’s sharp nose, the chiselled jawline, the long dark lashes, the obsidian curls. The man in his bed is exactly who he thought it was. 

While confusion plagues Arin more than anything else, there is also a sense of relief. It is as if everything he’d gone through with Dan disappearing was just some nightmare, something that hadn’t actually happened, when in reality, Dan was really here all along, in bed next to him while he suffered through it and waited for it to end, but that couldn’t have been the case. 

Arin was there when it happened. Arin was there to watch Dan crumble and break when in front of the court. Hell, Arin was the one who had done it. He’d also gone a few weeks without Dan. There was no way that wasn’t real. The crushing disappointment of waking up alone every day was too poignant to have been anything but reality. 

Arin wants to pounce on Dan and shake him awake, check he really is here and it isn’t just another weird dream he was having, like last night on the couch. Just as he was about to do so, he pauses, the angry red scars on Dan’s back cross his mind. They definitely weren’t there before, he can remember Dan’s back being generally bare, aside from a couple of blemishes from before, drawing patterns on it in bed. 

Arin creeps around to the other side of the bed, being careful not to wake Dan, just to check what he saw when he woke up was right. Clear as day, they were still there. The scars look so fresh it was as if they were still open gashes, pouring blood, but no. The rest of Dan was clean, and the scars were the only thing that really stood out as new. What could’ve made them?

It didn’t take long for Arin to piece together. He wasn’t stupid. Sure, maybe a little dense at the best of times (after all, how many times had he attempted to play a game without knowing the controls first?) but there’s no way those couldn’t be scars from his wings. 

A flash of all sorts of emotions fly across Arin’s features. This was too much for the morning. He was pretty sure he still had chip crumbs on his shirt from last night. 

Not really knowing what else to do, he gingerly climbs back into bed, beside Dan. He wants to touch him, but it seems so foreign that he couldn’t bring himself to do so. It had been a relatively short time since they’d seen one another, but it had been so turbulent, so painfully heartbreaking, that Arin had taken into account that his fingers may never touch Dan’s skin again, make eye-contact with him directly ever again, so he was scared. What if he disappears, and like a reflection in a pool of water, Dan phases out of existence all over again, like ripples in the fabric of space-time? Even if he didn’t understand how it works, he wouldn’t put it past the universe, it seems to have a real vendetta against him lately. 

He felt like a creep, his hand hovering in the air just a few inches from the surface of Dan’s shoulder, like some pervert at a party. He exhales a large, disappointed breath, dropping his hand to the mattress in defeat. He truly is terrified. Confusion and relief had been replaced with uncertainty and panic. Arin leans back against his headboard, just sort of looking at Dan’s sleeping form and pulling his knees up to his chin. 

“C’mon, man.” He sucks in a breath through his teeth, the freezing cold air sending a sensitive shock through his jaw, “Just…he’s right there, bro. Come on! Come on!” He continues trying to quietly become his own hype-man until he’s compelled to shut up by the sound of Dan groaning softly and rolling onto his back, immediately gasping in pain, whining and quickly rolling back over, quite clearly awake now from the lack of the soft, deep breathing he was doing just a few seconds before. 

Dan forces himself to sit up, more so focused on the pain he was feeling than realising where he was, or who was there. 

“Fuuuuuck!” He almost pants, trying to stay as still as possible. 

Arin, on the other hand, was too shocked and distressed to say anything, freezing up like a statue, keeping his knees up to his chin. 

———

Dan huffs, eyes closed, trying to keep his muscles steady. 

The kickback from being a bodiless consciousness cast into the ether and then stuffed back into a human body was something he didn’t quite expect. The memory of the pain of his wing’s removal was still fresh. The remainder of the pain leftover was akin to the sharp hurt you feel when disinfecting a wound with an antiseptic solution. Basically, for lack of a better choice of words, it really fucking stings. 

Where is he? He hadn’t looked, he was too busy getting his bearings back in a physical form. There is something distinctly lacking in his skin. The soft, pleasing electric current of magic is missing, and it left him feeling somewhat cold. Was this what he was to expect from now on?

After a little bit, Dan forces his eyes open, staring at what seems to be a somewhat familiar wall. It smells familiar too. The…bed…he’s sitting on rings a bell. He grips the edge of the mattress, sensing a presence behind him. He carefully glances over his shoulder, trying not to aggravate the new scars on his back. 

Arin stares back at him with huge, scared eyes. 

It’s so surreal to both of them, to be in the same room again, like both of them had accepted their fate before this all happened. 

Dan is the first to speak, cracking a weak smile, “Surprise?”  


  
“S—S…” Arin mumbles, “Surprise? I don’t like surprises!”  


  
“You like me, though.” Dan allows his smile to grow into a grin, “Right?”  


  
Arin drops his head forward, peering at Dan from the corner of his eye, before chuckling, “Idiot!” He exclaims, shooting up and leaning toward Dan, “What did you do? Why’d you do this?"  


  
“I was miserable!” Dan defends himself, “You were miserable. We were both miserable. I told you I’d be willing to give my wings up for you.”  


  
“I never gave you permission to.” Arin shakes his head in disapproval. 

“I’m a grown-ass man, when did I ever need your permission?” He smirks, “I feel cold, so shut up and hug me already.”  
  


Arin doesn’t have to be told twice. All his fear melting away at Dan’s request, flying into his chest and throwing his arms around Dan’s shoulders, careful to avoid the scars. 

Dan winces a little at the pain of impact, but it doesn’t affect him with the same ferocity as before, now holding Arin like his life depends on it, more than reluctant to let go, so he doesn’t, keeping Arin close. 

Arin feels elated, ecstatic, even. Dan not disappearing like he might have originally expected was such a good feeling.

Dan and Arin allow the hug to go on for a bit. Something of a missed luxury. Finally, they separate and Arin takes in the sight that is Dan. “It’s…I guess…It’s just so good to see you. I thought this would never happen.”  


  
“I told you to wait, didn’t I?” Dan flashes his million-dollar smile that Arin had missed, “ _Grumps_ had to wait too, but I’m sure you missed me more.”  


  
Arin wants to cry in relief, but it seemed the shock hadn’t quite settled in yet. “So…so…is…this it? Are you here now, for good?”  


  
“Kinda…anti-climactic, huh?” Dan sighs, “Thought maybe there’d be fireworks or confetti, but it’s just you and a particularly new human me, in the same room, in the same bed, together again.”  


  
Arin smiles back at him softly, “I dunno, man. I kinda like it this way. I don’t need the fireworks or the confetti, I have you, and you’re the real prize for the video game boy!”  


  
“Gross and cheesy! But hey, who doesn’t love a little bit of cheese?”  


  
Arin breaks into giggles, just letting his heart sing with glee for a little, leaning against Dan as carefully as possible, “The only problem is, you’re just less attractive without the wings.”   


  
“Hey! Asshole!” 

———

**FOUR MONTHS LATER  
**  
———

Getting back in the groove of Earth had been tougher than Dan expected. Now without the pressure of granting a wish or a time constraint, Earth seemed so much tougher than before, he had a whole new life to carve out here! 

Everyone at the office had greeted him back with open arms, mentioning that Arin just hadn’t been the same without him. No one mentioned that time Arin broke out into tears, or stared at the start-up menu of a game for an hour wordlessly, but it was pretty clear they knew that something had been going on between them at the time, even if it was just a breakup. However, it was so much more than just a breakup.

The only thing that kept Dan moving forward with motivation was Arin. 

It only took a few weeks of constant exposure to Arin for Dan to know he’d made the right choice in coming back down here. Arin was always cheering him on. Urging him to start making music again. Taking him out and helping Dan acclimatise. He’d wondered if the effect of Arin would waver after a while, but it never did. Everyday Dan was happy to see and spend time with Arin. He got to spend all day and all night with Arin, and to neither of them, it felt like a chore, or like there was no escape. If anything, whenever the other one wasn’t around for a while, the one left behind would worry endlessly. 

To Dan, it was the worry Arin would turn straight back around and hate him again.

To Arin, it was the fear that he’d come back and Dan would be gone again.

Speaking of, Dan had been working on helping Arin through some trauma regarding his disappearance. Arin had been through several bouts of emotional whiplash all because of Dan, that Arin was suffering pretty bad with nightmares and was a little more sensitive than usual, showing up in clinginess or a hover-craft possessiveness when it came to Dan interacting with anyone else. 

However, everything was generally calm and happy.

Tonight, Arin had taken Dan back to the Japanese place they had eaten at when Dan first showed up. After eating there, Arin had taken a drive to a small outlook location that looked out across LA’s glittering skyline.

Dan stares at the twinkling lights. Places like this, that he didn’t know existed, just made Dan realise that to some extent, Earth was just as pretty, if not more than Heaven. Breathing out a deep breath he smiles serenely, “This place is beautiful.”  


  
“Mm-hm.” Arin nods, his smile matching Dan’s, “I thought you might like it out here. It’s the highest place I could think of. I’m sure it’s not anywhere close to how high you could fly with your wings but…I wanted to at least make the transition as easy as I can.”  


  
“Arin…” Dan mumbles, looking back out across the ledge, leaning against the wooden bannister that keeps them from falling, “When you say stuff like that, it just makes me realise that I never said something.”  


  
Arin arches an eyebrow, glancing back to Dan, “Yeah? What’s that?”  


  
“I’m sorry.”   


  
Arin pauses and takes that in, shaking his head weakly, “You don’t need to apologise.”

“But I do, though.” Dan continues, “I can’t properly understand how weird and painful all of this must’ve been for you. You had to deal with falling in love with me, and me falling in love with you. That’s a lot on it’s own, especially after the heartbreak you went through with Suzy…and that was also when you still thought I was a human. But then…just…I was an angel, I used you, I destroyed you, and all your trust essentially. I can’t comprehend how you have enough compassion to forgive me. How you have enough compassion to get back together with me.”

Arin lets his head lull back, looking up at the stars, “It’s because I love you.” There’s a short silence between them, “I’d do and put up with anything for the person I love. For my soulmate.”   


  
“S—Soulmate?” Dan blinks. 

“Yeah.” He laughs airily, “You know how some people say, when they met in the weirdest ways, that it makes sense? Because there’s no way your soulmate lives just across the street from you. That’s how I feel about you and me. I can’t even begin to put together a weirder way to meet your soulmate.” He moves to lean against Dan’s side, “So…you’re mine. I think. If not that, at least you’re my guardian angel.” 

Dan pouts, “I hurt you more than any guardian angel should. I did everything to advance my own plight, yet, I said I loved you? That’s why I gave up my wings. It took everything that happened for me to realise that I didn’t deserve you then, so I had to do something to make up for that, so I did. It took me realising that you, Arin, are my Heaven, and I’ll work however hard I have to to be deserving of you.”  


  
“You’re plenty deserving now, Dan.”

“Really? You basically have to go to therapy now because of me.”  


  
“I’m scared you’ll leave again.” Arin says softly, to no one in particular, “That’s what the issue is. That sadness, the one that manifests itself deep in your stomach? That was all I could feel when you weren’t here. I tried to liken it to something similar to anger, dread maybe, but it wasn’t. It was just a sadness that I never want to feel again. So I get anxious when you’re not around, or when you go out by yourself. If you never come back, then I’ll have to feel it again. Nothing could ever repair the hole in my heart that you left behind, so what if you disappear again?”

“That’s not going to happen again, Arin. I promise you.”  


  
“And that’s what I tell myself when I’m trying to go to sleep at night. But that fear is always what’s there. I’m not so much broken as damaged goods.” He laughs again, “But at the same time, I’ve gotten addicted to the relief I feel whenever I wake up and you’re still there. Or when you come back from the store. It’s not healthy, you know, the dependence on relief. So that’s why I brought you up here tonight.”  


  
Dan feels a knot in his stomach, that sounded like something you say when you’re about to break up with someone. “Wh—?”   


  
“I need something other than relief. I need insurance.”   


  
“Insurance?” Dan repeats, “What do you mean insurance?”  


  
“I mean I need something to assure me that you’ll never leave me again.” 

“And…well, how is ‘up here’ going to assure you that I’m not?”  


  
“It’s not the location by itself. It’s what’s going to happen up here. Tonight.”  


  
Dan tilts his head in confusion, “You’re being really vague.”  


  
Arin looks out across the edge again, caught up in thought, “Yeah. Well. I guess I might as well just show you now.” 

Dan watches Arin carefully.

Arin huffs, stepping away from the edge, fishing a small box out of his pocket, dropping to one knee. 

Dan can do nothing, mouth just falling open in disbelief. 

“My assurance, and my insurance, Leigh Daniel Avidan, is binding you to me in the most romantic way possible. So, will you marry me?”  
  
Dan’s eyes sting, his vision becoming blurry with tears. “Arin….Arin, Oh my God.” It was nothing like Dan had ever experienced. Seeing the man he loved more than anything in the world, on his knees before him, asking for his hand in marriage. Dan had never been the marriage type, even with Erin, it wasn’t something he had ever envisioned, but with Arin like this, his future became crystal clear in his mind’s eye. There was no other answer besides “Yes, Yes! Of course, I’ll marry you.” 

Arin grins, popping open the box to reveal a simple platinum engagement band, pulling it out. He inspects it before gently pulling Dan’s hand from his side, slipping it on his ring finger easily. It fits snugly, perfectly.

Arin stands up again as Dan looks at his hand in awe, “It’s beautiful. God damn it…I love you, Arin. I love you so much I could burst!”  


  
“At least wait until we’re married to burst.” Arin leans in, pressing one soft, wonderful kiss to Dan’s lips. 

Dan flushes, wiping away any tears that managed to escape his eyes, “Stupid…I can’t actually burst and leave you if I just said that was never gonna happen again.” 

“True.” Arin looks up as a fleeting shooting star flies across the sky, “Haha…would you look at that? Make a wish.”   


  
Dan laughs a little, “Hmm…well…you’ve already granted my wish…but if I had to come up with one…I just wish Brian could come to our wedding. Come down here, and see how happy I am with you. I should’ve thanked him for everything he did for me, and his support.”  


  
Arin nods, “Who knows. Maybe he’ll hear that. By the way, do you have any idea how to mail a letter to Hell? I’d kinda like Ross to be there too.”  


  
“Yeah. That’d be awesome.”  
  
———

In the months where Dan had been gone, Brian had just been doing his best to keep his head down, doing his work to the best of his ability. 

Dan’s empty seat next to him had been taken up by a new recruit, and it just left Brian feeling at a loss. What, with his best friend being gone for longer than he was before, Brian kind of ached to see Dan again. 

Brian is shaken from his thoughts by the sound of a new wish pinging up on his screen. 

Dan’s brand new human profile stares back at him.

His wish printed in a neat, obvious font. 

Brian bites his lip in surprise before he starts to laugh softly, watching the video of the moment Dan made his wish play over.

There was no way for Brian to get down to Earth… except for one. One way that his best friend went through. 

But hey.

In the end.   
  


“How bad can Earth really be?” He grins, scribbling the wish ID on a post-it note and heading to the elevator to go and see the CEO, for, hopefully, the last time. 


End file.
